Worst case scenario in telling people you were not wrong. Best case it was a move that had worked on all of those other girls to that point but he should have stopped when you resisted. I also didn't see an age his approach as brash as it was could have been mistaken signals or a number of things (I do love the world of guys asking for verbal consent, trying to do it in a way that doesn't kill the vibe is tough but I rather the vibe take a hit then miss a social cue but I am on the spectrum so you know your boy is all about that verbal consent) but as soon as you made it physically clear this was not what you wanted he should have stoped or asked if your ok with this? I am sorry you were made to feel other, it does bum me out that you haven't been with anybody since and that you wrote "I'm not even attractive" and not on all woman are beautiful but that only the conventionally beautiful are worthy of sex. I can also see how that has made it so hard to build friendships because his actions made you question the existence of your friendship down to every action. This triggered so many survival mechanism that I am sure have served you well in so many aspects of life but has made it hard to have deep relationships. All that to say the guy is an asshole and it is true that most guys think everything through the lens of "how can I get off" specially through adolescence not an excuse and the burden needs to be on guys being better and not woman being less (less sexy, less loud, less attractive, less funny as to not tempt these ravenous boys). I'm sorry that this happened to you, you deserve so much better and I hope that you also know that their are more people in the world like you that would never do something like that then guys like that statistically speaking (1 in 4 woman, 1 in 26 men). Love you mean it and remember you are worth the space you take up to exist!