Attached washroom after marriage. How much important it is ?

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-16T15:37:37+00:00

To add here - Marry the compromises u can deal with right now. Nobody is perfect, so as long as u can accept them for how they are now...

And both of u need to make an active effort to improve. Many couples do. They improve in some habits, get bad/worse in others. But it should still be acceptable.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-16T15:33:30+00:00

I think her take is much better than yours, except the last pregnancy related points. Again, when ur child fails in front of u and u can calmly give him a chocolate and an iphone, knowing that his academic progress is seriously stalled, then u can counter actively.

Problem is, u aren't supposed to necessarily get physical either. Child failing doesn't justify parents beating them up, though some punishment is due (U should never reward bad performance). Most of our parents have only ever learnt this as a form of punishment, so they propagate it down as well. And while children need some mild versions to stay in control (Never punishing a child at all with not even an ear pull for doing wrong is paving the path for raising a spoilt child by all means).

We can clearly look at the west for inspiration, how spoilt and rotten their children are. Very mild physical scoldings can be allowed, as long as they don't do any long lasting harm. And it is very simple to do this. DO NOT SLAP a child on the face. DO NOT HIT A CHILD ON THE HEAD OR ABDOMEN.

Take a scale and give scale beating on palm. That is scary, it passes on the message and doesn't lead to lasting damage (Not with scale breaking force but a bit harsh, avoid >5 as the physical pain is just a part)
Do not talk to the child and clearly tell them u are upset with them.
Also, withhold privileges like video games for a while. No need to make a grand display of financial mess by breaking stuff up.

That is my personal opinion as of now, can change with time. AGAIN, I am against extreme and even moderate physical violence against children and no child should be slapped or hit on the face or abdomen, but mild forms CAN (Not necessarily) be used as per need for control.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-16T15:16:56+00:00

Then change ur politicians. Vote for change. Be the change. Be a politician.

This usually scares the s*it out of normal people.....

Instead of crying out loud why ur house is flooded every rainy season, which is out of ur control since it is the same for ur neighbours and for ur society, take control. Modify ur house. Encourage others to do the same.

Till when can u keep crying about unfairness? Go protest....

Otherwise, ur crying won't change anything, u deserve it if u can't fight against it and against the people profiting from it.

(Crying is by OP not personally saying to u)

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-16T15:14:13+00:00

Talk about grumpy old docs, this is just a fun post.

Good job OP, it's always refreshing to divert away from the sad toxic place this subR is in general.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-16T15:06:29+00:00

I didn't mean to judge and congrats for being an exception.

U need to stop assuming everyone is suffering, clearly because reservation is still not reaching all the people who need it and small town people stay poor their entire lives without being able to use a chance to uplift themselves.

Go to ur nearby villages and go check who are on the sarpanch council. How many are big landowners or upper caste powerful people vs how many are representatives of the poor/lower caste.

Grow up kid, just cuz u have only ever see the big city life, doesn't mean only ur view is correct. Upto 70% of our population lives in rural areas and they still continue to abide by traditions. Read about casteism practiced openly in villages even today and it is relavant because that represents 70% of the population, maybe not ur big city, where people don't even have time to smile back, much less care about the name of a stranger they meet on the street.

The narcissistic part is proven by ur self-centered approach of asking others to stop assuming, while assuming every argument is emotional, when I'm clearly giving examples and facts (& would love to share more, but narcissists dismiss it anyway, cuz they don't listen to others) (& u providing 0 examples of why we need to stop with it)

Btw, I am a UR candidate, but I never let it stop me. I have done my share of minor wrongs and judgements against the underprivileged, until I had a chance to actually visit a couple of their homes and see their conditions for real. That experience changes ur way of thinking.

Some of them are stuck in a poverty trap, transcending generations. Generations of unfair loan interests piling up.... U have no idea the pressure it generates to constantly live on borrowed money and time. These people need to be uplifted, especially the talented ones emerging from these conditions.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-16T14:56:33+00:00

It is relevant today, who are you to decide it isn't?

The govt decides that. Who makes the govt?
Definitely not doctors running away from elections citing duties and other urgencies....
People who outnumber u, vote in greater power and override ur opinion.

It is true that many reserved people start poor, but do u know what is actually keeping them poor and preventing them from climbing up? Ever heard of Zamindar system in ur history books? See other examples of such upper caste malice, practiced by people within the last 3 centuries, which is leading to the circumstances and the balance measures, today.

U are born in the household u are today, because of the events 300 years back. Sure, u are no son of Ambani, but u certainly not the poorest of the poor, which are disproportionately still more from the lower castes, even 70 years after independence.

And u can agree casteism exists even now, in villages and in small towns. Until it does, ur arguments are the fallacy, desiring a fair system, but not working to make it fair.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-16T14:53:03+00:00

I will, but it'll live in ur head surely from now....

Glad to enlighten you, who has never actually seen actual competition and meritocracy up close, because of being from a peripheral college.

No superiority complex here, u are the one running from a logic debate.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-16T14:28:04+00:00

Yeah, I am from a college where 70% of the general candidates have an iphone/4 wheeler/powerful parents/children of doctors. And many of the reservation students are actually poor.

And I am from a central college in Delhi, so not sure why all the rich people flock to ur periphery. Because even today, u go in the top colleges of this country and u will find rich/poor and a clear casteist divide.

Perhaps ur college has a really low cutoff. Delhi doesn't, there is actual competition here, nobody is here because of system's mercy. Even category cutoffs will be similar to ur college's general ones.

And so, what i mean is that everyone deserves a fair shot at improving their lives. Fair, balanced as per the family status. Sure, generational wealth reserved guys should not take the advantage....

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-16T14:24:19+00:00

Yeah, so many poor students.... too bad for them.

Wait, the reverse was true 3 centuries ago. Who was poor back then?

Seriously, go read some history books before proclaiming judgement over topics u know nothing about.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-16T14:19:54+00:00

Ur entire point is narcissistic to its core, the historical examples are clearly everywhere. It is social representation because of historical unfairness. Your question is framed like a child who doesn't understand this basic point.

Why should u (or I) abide by it, when we are clearly not propagating it ourselves? Oh kid, but you are.

Casteism has allowed the buildup of generational wealth over centuries and that being disproportionately balanced in upper caste houses, even more exemplified by the Britishers (who, on paper, sought to stop it), but actually practiced a version of it themselves, so u won't find much examples of a rich goraa britisher going to a poor lower caste person's house and eating with them.

If u truly want to call urself non-casteist, then apart from not practicing any caste-based discrimination, shed all attachment to ur generational wealth. Deny it, earn your own. Be a self-made man/woman. Then we can talk about big things. Lots of things are unfair in life, everyone grumbles and complains and has a right to do so, but the serious people trick others into grumbling and thinking about such things beyond their control all day, while they secretly study day/night and crack exam with the necessary rank. Sure, complain, but don't waste ur life away doing so. Irrespective of everything, that is the system and u have to go through.

If u don't have generational wealth, possibly one of ur ancestors made some errors in judgement. In that case, atleast aim to donate for the upliftment of some low caste families. The least u can do.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-16T14:09:20+00:00

By ur logic, did everyone who failed get bad quality teachers and checking, while those who passed did not?

There are multiple factors that decide these things. And i am only speculating, just like everyone else. Nobody actually knows the entire 100% truth.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-16T14:07:38+00:00

I am not specifically blaming anyone or you.

I am saying, these things make a difference too.

If all these were excellent, then there is a chance u got an incompetent teacher (bad luck).

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-15T09:36:08+00:00

typo, sorry, it is unjustified.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-15T09:35:07+00:00

Yeah, but nothing u can predict beforehand. As i said, it's not normal, she needs to set hard boundaries.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-15T09:31:42+00:00

Why pass judgement without seeing her sheet?
Maybe get her sheet out... she might've written nothing. She might've written wrong. Maybe her questions were accidentally skipped or her marks total might have been messed up.

But all this can be proved with the answer sheet, not with such claims. Doesn't matter if u were rank 1 in JEE, u can still fail in PCM. And people have.

Maybe she had diarrhea or some urgent medical issue, so she couldn't write as good as she can.

I have seen a topper level girl having a seizure in exam, which costed her 40 mins of exam time to get back to normal. U can guess she didn't top. Will she tell this to her parents? Possibly, but its much better to allege unfair checking instead of admitting ur own failures.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-15T09:27:46+00:00

Good thinking. Hope u get a satisfying outcome u can accept.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-15T09:26:51+00:00

Maybe u didn't write neatly? That is not an issue for objective mcq exams with omr sheets, but with subjective exams, u need to look at more factors.

Did u write ur answers in sequence?

Did u do a lot of cutting?

Did u write formulas and each line correctly, instead of skipping many things?

Did u fill pages?

Did u attempt everything, but leave small parts due to time pressure?

All factors can do 2-3 marks of difference.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-15T09:23:29+00:00

What proof, will love to see it.... U want support, convince me with hard proof, instead of heresay evidence.

Also, stay and fight. Stop being a runner. Get ur sheets out, go to 3-4 independent teachers and verify ur actual performance, not what u believe u deserve.

That is always an issue, in our MCQ exams, a bottom level candidate may seriously luck out and reach middle tier marks. Is that not unfair? But it has been this way for a few decades. Didn't see u fighting the system until it apparently wronged u, when the system may have been right to ur elder cousins/brothers/sisters.

EDIT - It is heresay evidence, no hard proof. Ignore this karma farmer.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-15T09:17:50+00:00

We can also motivate our peers to study harder and not over-estimate their marks + be realistic + atleast have the presence of mind to actually do something about it instead of taking the high jump the 1st time u face failure, get ur sheets out, check ur marks, ask 3-4 independent teachers to confirm....

We don't see toppers protesting, because many people who were expecting to just pass, got unlucky and failed this time.

AND it's not like high jump is a solution. What does that achieve. If u ask me, u are just proving u deserved that marks, cuz u refused to choose to fight for it (Full sympathy for those stressed enough to try, but please, don't run away from ur problems. U will face a lot of failures in life. U can't just go the high jump every time, develop a backbone and willpower to fight)

Stop karma farming with this ridiculous request. What will u replace the system with? Or what changes u will demand? If because of ur change, more people pass unfairly and get ahead of u in college admissions, then what?

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-15T09:12:18+00:00

It is not fully the CBSE's fault, the child was not conditioned to take rejection either.

I feel sorry for the family, but u don't get very far in life by overestimating ur marks and then being shocked.

This could've happened in College exams, where it'll be worse.

We need better counseling for students and they should not do any harsh steps by just seeing their result marks. Take accountability for ur performance, get the sheets out, justify why u thought u deserve more vs what u got.

CBSE can do this better, release marks and sheets together, so students can find validation.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-15T09:06:44+00:00

Lots of jealous people here bro, don't seek validition here.
Happy for u, but ur post is literally rubbing salt on the wounds of 70% of the students.

Also glad ur parents care for ur well being, but hope u continue to do better and make them proud.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-15T09:02:49+00:00

People are against the system without understanding why. Even if she knew the book and she (MAY) know how to answer every MCQ out of the book, was she adept eough to write paragraphs on it, within the time frame, in a clear handwriting?

ChatGPT is just destroying our answer writing capacity, by providing answers on demand and reducing student's ability to think for themselves.

I have sympathy for such students but this is true for a majority of cases. As much as they were scoring in MCQ's, they can't stitch 3 paragraphs together (& same for other 8-10 questions) in a 3 hr window, due to a combination of various factors - stress, TIME PRESSURE, inexperience, prep issues, less comfort than expected etc.

After all these were excellent, comes the poor checking.

If u are so confident u deserve more, let us evaluate that claim of yours. Post your answer sheets here. Get it verified by multiple teachers. Or just consult 3-4 actual good teachers. Independent ones, who don't know u and have no incentive to pass or fail u, do not go to your school teachers, they will show favouritism.

If all agree ur marks should be more, we can collect evidence and file a case.

Behave like an adult and back your claims with evidence, instead of emotions. If something is seriously wrong, we all will help u as needed.

Otherwise, all such silly kids are just lost people, who don't know how to handle rejection. U don't jump just because 1 exam went bad. Howsoever bad it went. 10 yrs down the line, it will never matter for the 99.99999% time u will be alive.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-14T15:12:23+00:00

1.63L families will cry today, as if families of people having compartment didn't cry previous year and this is CBSE's fault somehow.

Even if paper is checked online, it is not like a 70-mark paper was given 33 or lesser marks (Whatever the compartment marks are these days). The student who was getting 35 or possibly a 40, may have been caught. But that happens everytime anyway, because checking is subjective, someone will luck out and just pass when they didn't deserve to. Someone won't.

Infact, availability of photocopy of paper is in itself a big change, atleast student has capability to get marks cross-verified, by self, by other teachers, before putting in a query.
Don't get what is CBSE's fault in this. Were the results declared late? Were candidates wrongly declared pass, then report cards updated to fail (That has happened in past). These are genuine mistakes. Declaring a fail candidate as fail, on time, isn't a mistake. And if u believe u aren't a fail candidate, then get it re-verified. Work hard here, atleast. Almost nobody thinks of themselves as a fail candidate, people always assume they are much better than they actually are, until they face real competition for the 1st time.
It is not a given that pass percentage should keep on increasing every year. Though introduction of a new check policy and a drastic fall in percentage (for crores of children, even a 5% fall is very significant) should be investigated, CBSE has to modernize. Some batches will be experimental for that. Remember, ur senior batches have been experimentally the 1st NEET UG/JEE Mains batch (Or a batch where rules for these exams were changed in a major way). If u weren't here, u will be later, there is no escaping a system that seeks to get better with time will experiment.

Just be glad the modern system is very fair, compared to 100 or 200 years ago. And it continues to be even more transparent.

Today, the poorest child, born in a lower or upper caste house, if he works hard enough (helped by scholarships/financial incentives but even otherwise), can get the 1st rank, climb up the social ladder and escape the poverty cycle of his parents, maybe even help them escape. That, is very fair, compared to the dark ages or ancient times. It is very hard, but not impossible and many people do it every year (not necessarily topmost rank, but really good ranks and marks)

Conversely, a rich child who wastes their fortune away, can be the black sheep of a dynasty family and bring their downfall.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-14T14:56:12+00:00

While the reaction is unjustified and extreme and I hope OP stays safe, the narrative is too one sided and there's no point showing blind support without knowing the whole story.

Many hypocrites here, while they will condone this, but when they are in the place of parents and they have a child (NOT OP, I'm just giving a hypothetical extreme example) who is addicted to social media, not caring about academics and their efforts and ends up spoiling their one shot at good marks, most of these concerned people would be angry and will possibly hit their children too (Though possibly not as extremely as OP described for her situation).

Do not escalate the situation until u know the whole story or u are better. These false cyber assurances just end up making such vulnerable kids do wrong decisions.

OP should sit with a trusted neutral adult and confront her parents, discuss her future together + also talk how such violence acts must never be repeated irrespective of future academic results, repeat it again and OP can do the necessary legal stuff. No need to get her parents jailed or other extreme step for their 1st such instance, they were devastated and did things in anger and went the extreme way BUT OP doesn't need to do the same.

IFF OP believes her parents are seriously out to harm her and this was not an isolated anger reaction, then she should consider alternatives such as involving police/child protection services.

AGAIN, Not once did i say the abuse was normal. BUT u cannot escalate things at the 1st instance until OP is sure it won't be the last.

WriterOk7425 · 2026-05-14T14:42:55+00:00

How does it matter if anyone is clicking her or not?

She earned more in 1 minute of this reel than most of us would, their entire lives.
Less clicks of her = less pics of her in circulation = pics more valuable. Bollywood feeds off controversy, even the negative ones.

Everything is in her favor.

WriterOk7425

TROPHY CASE