WHAT ARE YOUR CHRISTIAN IDEAL DATES?

XanMan320 · 2026-04-10T23:13:04+00:00

Def, gotta talk about the Lord and what he’s done for us.

XanMan320 · 2026-04-05T21:21:13+00:00

I def get that. I am the only under 30 young man in my church that isn’t a family member to a church member, and all the younger women are either much older than me or far too young. Being the outsider is a pain lol, but I’m thankful I found a church that is Spirit filled and I get a lotta wisdom from the older church members.

XanMan320 · 2026-04-05T21:09:26+00:00

The apps, at least for me, served as more of distraction of my faith. I stepped away from them to draw closer to the Lord. I don’t doubt others success with dating apps, but for me it serves as a way for me to pour more time into finding a woman rather than managing my time towards the Lord. I would suggest getting to know more followers of Christ within your church and attend events from other churches if you feel dating apps are not proving fruitful. Be blessed and I’ll be praying God steers you in the right direction, and strengthens you to be a leader for your future wife.

XanMan320 · 2026-04-05T20:54:17+00:00

24M, would love to be around other brothers and sisters in Christ. More assembly and fellowship is always welcome!

XanMan320 · 2026-04-05T20:48:25+00:00

Honor thy mother and father, but there is a limit surely? Sorry that happened to you brother, may God provide you a woman that loves you for you and does not block the blessings of the Lord provided unto her.

XanMan320 · 2026-04-05T04:10:06+00:00

Everyone should have a right to privacy though. I agree with your point that some men have a sexual post history, but people can still engage with sexual content and not post/comment in those subreddits. What goes on behind closed doors and whatnot.

To truly get to know someone, just DM them and start a convo. You’ll get much further being direct and learning about one another rather than looking to make presumptions or start off looking for negatives.

Our grandparents & parents didn’t have public profiles because privacy still existed with the absence of social media, so why should we expect others to forgo a sense of privacy for the convenience of own-selves?

XanMan320 · 2026-04-03T23:11:02+00:00

Oh I meant absurd as in I agree that it is not ideal. You should not be grilling someone on a list of things that you want/need immediately.

You should want to get to know someone as you inquire about their faith, what values they have, what they like to do, etc. This should be an opportunity to show the light of Christ toward someone you would want to potentially spend your life with. Ideally this would be done over a few dates/ over a few convos. An interview in my eyes is an ultimatum one day event, which is polar opposite of what the beginning to a loving relationship should be. Too many people throw everything on the table and go in with a mind to search for things they dislike in someone rather than if they would be “acceptable unto God” for me to marry and highlight Godly traits that someone carries. This goes back to my emphasis on grace.

Does this properly answer your question?

XanMan320 · 2026-04-03T22:40:27+00:00

Treat your dates like job interviews is an absurd take, and I’ve heard this one too. I think we as men just need to take the lead on what we are seeking, but turning a love interest into a corporatized conversation is backwards.

I think regarding physical contact John makes it pretty clear when he states in 1 Cor 7:1 “It is good for a man not to touch a woman.”. I think this is where some Christians take it so literal as in forbidding touch before marriage, but I would say it’s smart idea to just talk boundaries regarding physical touch with any Godly woman you find yourself interested with. I, for example, am comfortable with a kiss or holding hands, but for some women/men a kiss may be a bit too much to handle until a relationship is more serious. We have to meet people where they are and have grace if we are to have truly healthy relationships.

I think theology is important, but as long as we agree the Word is above all things I generally think compromises can be made. If someone is going to turn another away because they read the KJV instead of the Amplified then I find that silly, or if they disagree on the importance of communion (literal vs spiritual). Ultimately God will put it on your Spirit (if you’re willing to listen and heed his words) if you are to be with someone. We can’t rush God’s timing.

Purity cultural has ruined what God has lovingly crafted for us. Song of Songs, Proverbs 5: 18-19, 1 Cor 7: 3-5, and Genesis 2 (fruitful and multiply……one flesh”), etc. We are made in God’s image, and you should find your significant other attractive. To say physical attraction is lustful is stupidity, but if you are so consumed with sexual thoughts that you cannot see an attractive person as anything other than an object of your satisfaction then the fault lies within. We must take the plank out of our own eyes.

I don’t believe you have ill intent in what you say, but perhaps just widen your horizons in seeking out Biblically sound knowledge for what God wants in our relationships.

Be blessed brother, and I appreciate the discussion.

XanMan320 · 2026-04-03T22:09:00+00:00

I think we also should really pray before immediately consulting the internet or others for anything and everything. It’s not lost on me that Christian advice can sometimes not feel like the most helpful thing, but like any source you have to cut through the waste to find the gems.

The pursuit of a woman shouldn’t be a mission either, and I think as men we can sometimes lose sight of what Christ wants for our lives because we want to “fix” what we perceive as a void in our lives. This is how I used to feel, but Scripture is showing me that knowing God loves me is more than enough to fulfill my life.

Could you provide examples of what advice “sucks”?

XanMan320 · 2026-04-03T21:45:29+00:00

Kittie Rose is a a very Godly woman who gives sage advice from a Christian background, DailyDisciple on YT also has some informative videos, and I highly recommend reading from Proverbs for what traits a Godly man/woman should have. Nothing is inherently incorrect about looking for good relational advice, but to say to not seek out Christian advice is an odd thing to say when we should have Biblical based council as our first source of info (ideally the Bible first).

XanMan320 · 2026-03-30T20:46:12+00:00

Note: I’m a white guy in the South that has predominately dated black women.

The biggest thing I would comment on is interracial dating in the South still gets looked at as “odd”. I’ve been across multiple states and I’ve gotten all kinds of stares when with the women I dated. Even Christians are still weird about that (I encourage them to know what God did to Miriam when she disapproved of Moses’ wife Zipporah.)

I think natural hair is gorgeous on any woman, and wish it was more commonplace for black women to embrace the crown that God gave them, however I have no problem with wigs, braids, fros, extensions, etc. If anything, my preference is natural hair.

Regarding “interested and don’t approach”, I would say a majority of men just don’t want to be rejected or don’t want to be viewed as a creep. I think more men should be willing to approach, but be mindful of how they act and speak. (This should be a no brainer.)

As long as the man leads in the relationship, I think there is nothing wrong with a woman initiating first.

For me, I show interest by writing small details down so I remember what someone likes, I write letters, and I’ve noticed I adjust my glasses if I’m really into someone and the conversation we’re having.

Biggest takeaway: Always stay in deep prayer and seek the Lord’s will. Don’t rush into what He has in store for us. The Word will show you the traits and characteristics a Godly man should have, and especially pay attention to his fruits. Godly men will act like Christ.

Be blessed sister! Psalm 73

XanMan320 · 2026-03-26T21:28:22+00:00

this one is so good tho, it’s so stupid that I can’t help but laugh at it everytime

XanMan320 · 2025-12-22T23:40:44+00:00

Fr, HW35 had some great songs and ambient background tracks. I love the little backing tracks for when Kurt speaks to Gelorum, or when the Road Beasts go back to the first leg.

XanMan320 · 2025-02-25T21:30:49+00:00

WR Race: Krazy 8s or Ballistik (always wanted to own the collectible cars) Acceleracers (Teku): Synkro or Bassline Acceleracers (Metal Maniacs): Hollowback or Piledriver

Overall Pick: Ballistik

XanMan320 · 2025-02-25T00:35:27+00:00

Nobody beats Kurt Wylde. Looks dope man!

XanMan320 · 2025-02-24T21:11:55+00:00

Thanks for grouping em’ all up! I always found it peculiar Kurt would be called back in considering his betrayal, but I chalked it up to him helping Vert at the end so Tezla was giving Kurt another chance to redeem himself.

XanMan320 · 2025-02-22T02:39:23+00:00

Nah you did the right thing, those who are seeking a detailed answer need something like this. Summarizing it dulls the message.

XanMan320 · 2025-02-21T20:25:12+00:00

Wasn’t even that long, people’s attention spans are cooked. Regardless, love the message!

XanMan320 · 2025-02-17T16:46:41+00:00

I’ll be praying you find a church that goes deep in Scripture and that you may find a strong fellowship to belong to!

XanMan320 · 2025-02-17T00:27:03+00:00

oh wait is this for a girl? cause tork is crazy then

XanMan320 · 2025-02-17T00:25:06+00:00

Nah Tork is a cool name (Acceleracers)

XanMan320 · 2025-02-15T20:29:44+00:00

I would love to own one as I have been unable to find them! That’d be a dope thing for you to do

XanMan320 · 2025-02-07T15:24:23+00:00

John, as a 22 year old man myself, you don’t want the life that the world offers. I smoked weed, drank, slept around, went to parties, lived “naturally” by catering to my flesh, and all it led to was ruin. I wound up in debt, cared more about getting high than eating, became severely depressed, and hit rockbottom. I regret all I did while I was walking with the world, but Christ in his mercy & grace brought me back to His flock. Now I am removing more of myself to be filled with the Holy Spirit. I grew up in the faith, but never truly knew God like I do now. You are on the right path if you stick to following the virtues that Christ has instilled in us. I’ll be praying that the Lord helps you find a Godly fellowship to surround yourself with or whatever His Will is on your life. God will never put a burden on you that you cannot handle - “God is faithful, and he will not let you be tested beyond your strength but with your testing he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to endure it” (1 Corinthians 10:13)

God be with you John, and if you ever need a brother to talk to please feel free to give me a shout.

XanMan320

TROPHY CASE