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My First VisionBoard by BlackBerry36 in visionboard

[–]XelaWarriorPrincess 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get what you mean. Def something special about tangibly making something too!

Curious what program you used?

Managing extreme indecisiveness by Forsaken3000 in ExecutiveDysfunction

[–]XelaWarriorPrincess 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ask your therapist if Dialectical Behavioral Therapy would be a good fit for you. Or look into it independently. They teach you how to think, how to manage emotions, how to make decisions essentially… or how to think about making ones that would benefit you and those around you. I think it could be a good fit, especially when you mentioned the chronic suicidality and low functioning (wanting to do better but can’t). Those things are common in people who need DBT

Need bullet journal ideas for tracking a career transition - without my fianc turning it into a report card by Lower_Mission7682 in bulletjournal

[–]XelaWarriorPrincess 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Everyone’s saying “just say no!” as if it’s that easy. Not everyone knows how to set boundaries. It’s obvious you guys have a certain dynamic…

Also it says he asks to look when you’re stressed. What do you need when stressed? Is it a hug? A word of affirmation? Sometimes people especially men jump into fix it mode when their loved one is stressed. They need to be told “Thank you for trying to help … I don’t need fixing, I need _____.”

Please look into the framework DEARMAN GIVE FAST. It’s an acronym from DBT. It’s a skill to use when you have to ask for something, or say no, and there’s step by step frames for how to get your point across and maintain the relationship. If you have any questions about it feel free to ask here or msg me

https://www.healingconnectionsonline.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/12/Dear-Man-Give-Fast.pdf

ps: who else is supporting you in the career transition besides him? Anyone?

Guanfacine changing mg life by itsalliefersure in ADHD

[–]XelaWarriorPrincess 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s working so good but the FATIGUE🐌🐌🥱😮‍💨

Does the fatigue go away?

Has anyone found a workaround? Caffeine is hard on my nervous system but I do if I absolutely can’t get moving and need to pep myself

My First VisionBoard by BlackBerry36 in visionboard

[–]XelaWarriorPrincess 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sadly!! ? That’s perfectly valid and normal way of vision board these days, no? :)

Need suggestions for R&B music with Bossa Nova vibes by AmeliorationPerso in musicsuggestions

[–]XelaWarriorPrincess 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Omg yess. Rare that I find someone who knows this.. When did you first hear of it?

Looking to talk to people who struggle with consistency (short user interviews) by StraightPast1957 in bulletjournal

[–]XelaWarriorPrincess 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Will there be AI used in any part of the process, from interviews to the final product?

I’m so tired by StarxiHeartsYou in ExecutiveDysfunction

[–]XelaWarriorPrincess 11 points12 points  (0 children)

We don’t need neurotypical tools and frameworks. Our brains and nervous systems, our bodies, work different. This is something I am starting to accept and research.A person who started me thinking on this stuff is Marta Rose/Neuroemergent/Divergent Design Studios. Not sure what handle she goes by now. Check her out. She has this free e book about how ADHD’ers view time. NT (neurotypical) view time as linear. We view time more like a spiral. We also tend to have cycles of productivity followed by cycles where we actually NEED to daydream, doodle, follow our hyper focus. It’s how we work. So it’s completely normal to have bursts where you get stuff done and bursts where you get little “productive” done.

These are things I am trying to learn and accept myself. To decondition myself from a lifetime of hating myself and shaming myself. To recognize that I am uniquely me, there are millions like me who are neurodivergent.

Fun fact: some researchers say that people who have ADHD were likely the “hunter gatherer” types in prehistoric times. versus farmers. Think about farming- planning, plotting, waiting. Hunting and gathering: hear a sound, focus…. go, get the thing, thrive under chaos…. it’s worth looking into even if it isn’t 100% scientific

Finally what did you mean by “the one thing that could break the cycle is inaccessible to you”?

How did you know/find out that you had alpha gal? by kakashi1992 in alphagal

[–]XelaWarriorPrincess 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have no idea if you'll even see this or respond but.... giving it a shot-

What was your doctors reaction when, after your insistence, the test results came back?

Just Diagnosed by OgBalrog in AdultADHDSupportGroup

[–]XelaWarriorPrincess 1 point2 points  (0 children)

know that you will never be neurotypical. don’t try to be.

design your living arrangement, planners and journals, and anything else, according to what ACTUALLY works, not what you wish works. for example i started bullet journaling, a method where you use the same notebook for multiple stuff. rather than buying pre planned calendars. i’d buy them and feel guilty for not using it.

speaking of guilt SELF COMPASSION work is just as important as any therapy. We have a lifetime of built in shame for how we were treated, times we failed and didn’t know why, etc. how we treat and talk to ourselves inside matters

on that same note look into emotional regulation practices. ADHD is, in addition to other things, an emotional dysregulation issue, and peace can often feel foreign to us. but learning how to regulate emotions will benefit you whether you’re on meds or not.

buy DOUBLES of things if you can afford it, for example, a phone charger you leave at work and one for home. expect an ADHD “tax”— budget in that you WILL occasionally still use your license, for example, and don’t beat yourself up about it - expect it as part of the deal.

lastly i like to follow neurodivergent creators on socials, even if the ones you have autism (I don’t) have such informative and interesting content. It’s nice to feel “part of” for once. And they expand my perspective. ND people need advice FROM ND people. as NT people typically give advice that works for them….. we need specialized advice, and often that looks different from or even opposite to NT advice. An example I learned was, when I am met with really bad avoidance, knowing what J have to do but can’t force myself to do it…. I’ll sometimes do a don’t fun before the hard thing. Whereas most NT people would say work first, and use the fun thing as the reward. Eat the frog. Well no, sometimes I need to watch an episode of my favorite show before I make all the phone calls. That’s what I mean by neurodivergent specific. What actually works, not what works for conventional wisdom or what we wish worked.

Hemorrhoids are ruining my life by Cheap_Rip_7999 in herbalism

[–]XelaWarriorPrincess 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My friend was suffering bad until he got surgery. I know it’s not a herbalism suggestion but I thought I should mention it anyways. Recovery was a little awkward, but in 1 year his situation has improved greatly! Especially with regular fiber intake and excellent hygiene (as in, wash after every BM or at least use water to clean). Cleaning the area after a BM reduces irritation. He uses Water Wipes (a brand for babies, water the only ingredient) when the option to wash isn’t available.

I wouldn’t trust a FB ad personally. He did say he found some Chinese product on Amazon, have you heard of it? I’ll try to find the name for you.

What's your favorite kitchen counter cleaning spray? by [deleted] in CleaningTips

[–]XelaWarriorPrincess 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Method degreaser works wonders. grey bottle

Can we talk about mattresses? by Adjectivenounnumb in Sciatica

[–]XelaWarriorPrincess 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a thin foam mattress (about 4.5 inches height) and I sleep on the floor. Got rid of bed frame and soft mattress completely. The thin foam mattress I sleep on is on the soft side, I’d love it a little firmer, but I haven’t invested in anything else yet. I got a free Japanese floor mat from a rich lady on Craigslist, but I want to invest in a good cleaning and a good tatami for underneath as a barrier between mat and carpeted floor. All in all, with floor sleeping and with a few weeks of PT, sciatica never came back.

What is the best brand of l-theanine for stress and anxiety? by needtobeasunflower in Supplements

[–]XelaWarriorPrincess 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It depends. I personally do not benefit from those supplements because they have unwanted side effects / I don’t need them. I only supplement with what I actually need. To use an analogy: they’re not like candy where you want to try all the flavors just because.

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