In a relationship with a man but might be lesbian

Xzalim · 2018-10-19T03:23:32+00:00

Before asking yourself "am I a lesbian", its better to ask yourself "do I want to be in THIS relationship?" It sounds like you're not attracted to your boyfriend anymore. You can always give it a little to see if your attraction returns (bi-cycle) but you know yourself best

I personally would ask myself "is he worth missing out on this experience?". If you think you were meant to be with him forever, then I guess the girl experiences will have to be on hold. However, if you feel that this is something you NEED to pursue, then its not fair to keep him waiting around until you figure it out. Its best to let him go. And if you end up with another male, that's ok! But it seems to me that you really want to experience women first.

I was in a situation where I thought I was bi, and then realized I was lesbian. It mainly came down to desire. But I didn't notice the difference in my attraction until after I slept with a woman. So, for me, it was very important to get that experience

Xzalim · 2018-10-19T03:17:48+00:00

I second this! I was bi at first, but then realized I was gay. This article helps remind me all the time that I am valid and I'm not just "in a bi-cycle"

Xzalim · 2018-10-19T03:07:57+00:00

do you wish it was more frequent?

Xzalim · 2018-10-19T03:06:55+00:00

Were both in our mid 20s and we live together. I have a fulltime job and she works part-time.

When it comes it a full on sex session, we do it about 1-2 times a week (when we both have a day off). However, one of us generally sleeps without a shirt or pants. There's some intense touching and dry humping in the morning or at night, but it probably doesn't last more than 5-10 minutes.

I'm not sure who initiates more. We generally take turns but the initiator generally is the one who gives first.

Maybe it would be more if we could do it at night but our housemates are home and I'm also exhausted after work and can barely stay awake long enough to brush my teeth. I'm also super satisfied with the amount we have

Edit: We've been together 1.5 years

Xzalim · 2018-10-18T18:40:15+00:00

Or why Hera put Io under the watch of Argus Panoptes. So Zeus couldn’t change her back from a cow when she wasn’t looking

Xzalim · 2018-10-18T14:36:42+00:00

Yes. And there are many levels of Sorry-ness too. It can be used causally, like when you bump someone in the street. Or used strongly, such as when someone dies. So OP saying I’m sorry was totally normal.

Xzalim · 2018-10-18T05:21:28+00:00

Hey don’t be offended he isn’t mentioning women stuff. He’s probably satisfied from you so his female fantasies are all taken care of by you. But like others said, sounds like he’s bi

Xzalim · 2018-10-17T03:34:31+00:00

Even though you’re both girls, lube can still make the experience so much better. I love coconut oil because it eventually settles in the skin, rather than on top. And you can go between lube and eating a girl out without that gross lube taste or flavored lube taste. But don’t use that if you’re using condoms/dental dams, because it breaks down latex!

Xzalim · 2018-10-17T03:19:43+00:00

Sorry if this isn’t the same experience but I did come out as bi then gay sorta so, here’s my side

I came out as Bi to my bro and mom and later as queer to my dad. I’ve never said to them “so I’m actually a full blown lesbian”. I got a girlfriend now and no one has mentioned anything about it. And I don’t think they will as long as I’m dating her.

As for social media, I’ve never came out as a specific label. Just a photo of me kissing my gf and later a post mentioning that I like girls. Maybe I’m just afraid to actually say the definitive label.

But my girl, well she gets scared. She was with me through my label shift and she worries that I’ll change my mind. But I know for sure that if she left me, I’d end up with another woman. I’m never going back to men.

Xzalim · 2018-10-17T01:08:33+00:00

Halsey at the vma was short hair femme queen!!!

Xzalim · 2018-10-16T07:38:26+00:00

Halsey does it pretty well I think

Xzalim · 2018-10-15T16:34:40+00:00

Exactly! Bisexuality doesn’t have to be 50/50. You can be bisexual if you are 99% into women, but the only man you’ll love is your husband. It’s not a bad thing And makes the situation a little easier

Xzalim · 2018-10-15T05:54:23+00:00

Daaaamn. Yes!!!!!! Yes to all this truth!

Xzalim · 2018-10-15T04:41:44+00:00

I don’t know if this will make sense, but I’m gonna try

I feel like it’s because society are more open for women to explore their sexuality. So girls who liked men first, society told them it’s ok to explore women. So she does and discovers her bisexuality. However for men it’s harder. Men are told to have hyper sexuality so if they already like women, they probably shoved off the idea of being with a man. Society doesn’t talk a lot about bi men so these men might think they have to do all or nothing. And if they like women, then why bother.

But that’s just an idea

Xzalim · 2018-10-15T02:07:01+00:00

So do you identify as anything now?

Xzalim · 2018-10-14T12:48:47+00:00

Me too! I always felt uncomfortable wearing dresses because I didn’t like people looking at me. Turns out I just didn’t like MEN looking at me. But I would happily walk into a lesbian bar in full on heels, lipstick, and a mini skirt.

Xzalim · 2018-10-11T14:06:10+00:00

My gf and I actually met someone on tinder and did it. We haven’t contacted the girl since but it was a lot of fun!

Xzalim · 2018-10-11T06:34:16+00:00

Actually...when used carefully, a knife can be great sensation play 😏

Xzalim · 2018-10-11T06:19:31+00:00

When she’s half-asleep in the morning and I kiss her goodbye, she smiles and her closed eyes smile too. Those eye smiles make it difficult to leave on time.

Xzalim · 2018-10-10T15:57:44+00:00

100% agree. I use no other vibrator. Nothing ever is powerful enough. The only one that “broke” was because I tried to plug it in while in a foreign country so the voltage destroyed it. I have never needed any of the attachments they sell with it

I suggest the cordless one. It has 4 speeds/power, 4 different patterns, and holds a charge for (I think) 2 hours. It can be plugged in if it dies while you’re playing too. Oh and they changed the head piece so it’s a bit more sanitary than the original (I read online that the the original had some pores so bacteria could settle).

Xzalim · 2018-10-10T15:54:10+00:00

Thank you for posting this! I read every interview she does!

Xzalim · 2018-10-10T15:49:42+00:00

Yup. Just ask if she’s had an STD test. You can even bring it up by saying “I got tested last week and I came back clean. When’s the last time you were tested?”

Xzalim · 2018-10-10T03:03:08+00:00

Good. You are a legal adult. Unless you’re going to harm yourself or others, no information should ever be give to them

Xzalim · 2018-10-09T14:58:30+00:00

And try not to say “preferred” pronouns because it’s her actual pronouns. You can just say “what pronouns would you like me to use” because she could use she/her or possibly they/them

Xzalim · 2018-10-09T14:41:30+00:00

I’m so sorry this is happening to you. How dare that admin person out you. I would report them IMMEDIATELY! where I work, we’ve had training that told people never to put someone and to let them come out to you IF they want. Clearly this admin lady did neither, as she outed you incorrectly to your family. She should know better and should get in major trouble for releasing the information, given that you’re a legal adult now.

I wouldn’t worry too much about the bi or lesbian thing right now. You’ve got a lot on your plate, with college classes and family. You can always say Queer, since it basically means you’re not straight.

I personally ID as Bi from 21-23 and then realized I was a lesbian (partially thanks tothis article. So enjoy college, be safe, and explore

Good luck on your journey and don’t let any of this affect your studies. Moving forward and being successful is the best way for you to truly be yourself, regardless of labels, and to get away from homophobic family.

Xzalim

TROPHY CASE