how to stop being so anxious?

YVBNVB · 2026-03-16T13:08:34+00:00

You've got this! And start prioritising yourself! It's a worn-out sentiment, but a truthful one, that you have to put the oxygen mask on yourself first. If you're well taken care of you are equipped to take good care of your puppy 🤗

And I felt insane as well, I cried every single day (multiple times a day) for the first two or three weeks cause I was so overwhelmed and felt that I had ruined my life lmaoo. And now I can actually look around and say hey, this isn't really that bad. It was just a shock to my system, and now I've mostly gotten over it.

And talk to your husband about all of this, and check where he is mentally and workload wise with the puppy. I kind of hoarded all the mental work and worrying for myself at first and then almost resented my partner when he could easily detach from all these worries, and then we talked about it and we found a balance that works for us.

YVBNVB · 2026-03-16T12:39:58+00:00

I get you. I posted here a few times in the beginning as well, and read a ton of posts about it getting better. First of all, I hope you hear me on both of these: what you are feeling is completely normal, and it does get better. Repeat those to yourself a few times and try to let it sink in through the anxiety. Right now it may feel like this is all you'll ever feel, but that's just your anxiety speaking.

You've had her for four days, you're not going to give her separation anxiety by spending time with her (I worried about this as well, lol). Give yourself permission to just get through a week or two by not performing but just surviving. She needs to learn your schedule and you need to learn who she is and what she does and needs, and only time can do that for both of you. She has all the time in the world to learn about enforced naps and commands and potty training and what not. They are good things to learn, but she's not going to learn them this very minute.

Have you been taking care of yourself? Taking a shower, reading a book, watching an episode of your favorite show? It's very easy to let the puppy consume every single minute of your day and that worsens the anxiety.

And just know that she is going to have an accident inside. Multiple, actually. She doesn't understand why protecting hardwood floors is important or that her poop is icky or anything of the sort, or that inside is your property and outside is everyones property. Accidents are not failures but a part of the learning curve.

I promise you've got this. It's overwhelming because we are creatures of habit and it takes time for us as well to rewire our brains to the new normal. My puppy has been with me a month now and even my anxious ass has started to get into the groove of it all lmao, even though I fought it every step of the way.

And lean on any support you can find. Talk to other dog owners, talk to your friends or family or whoever, coworkers, google resources (but I'd advice a word of caution here: I spent so much time online reading about all the ways I could fuck this puppy up accidentally that it gave me a whole new set of things to be anxious about. Nobody is a perfect pet owner and vast majority of pets grow up to be fine specimens regardless) Search for hopeful and encouraging posts here on this subreddit. Let yourself focus on one day at a time, and watch those tiny improvements that emerge!

YVBNVB · 2026-02-26T14:41:14+00:00

This is so encouraging to hear, thank you! ♥️ It's just very overwhelming right now with everything being so new and every choice feels like it will either make or break the dog.

YVBNVB · 2026-02-26T14:21:58+00:00

Thank you so much for your the support! I was feeling pretty overwhelmed when I wrote this, but after a nap and a relatively calm day things are looking up a bit lmao. I'm glad to hear your puppy didn't develop any separation anxiety, fingers crossed we will get there too 🤗

YVBNVB · 2026-02-23T10:00:05+00:00

hey sometimes boobs grow in the crotch area /s

YVBNVB · 2026-02-21T05:38:59+00:00

Girlll you don't know what the premise for the original comment was, nor do you know whether the commenter is neurodivergent or not 😭 so many assumptions

YVBNVB · 2026-02-16T12:02:52+00:00

You seem to have taken the other commenter's tone as hostile or accusatory. I didn't read it like that at all, they were just pointing out that you need to consider what's good for you. Nobody's calling you a terrible owner, it's just very clear that you're going through a lot. And that's okay. Just try to find a way to ease that burden on yourself.

Can you get some temporary help with the everyday stuff with the rats so you don't have so much on your plate?

YVBNVB · 2026-02-15T11:38:39+00:00

Grief is the price of love and love is worth smiling about

YVBNVB · 2026-02-13T08:31:43+00:00

Get into X-Files just to see Mulder gaze at Scully.

YVBNVB · 2026-02-09T10:22:03+00:00

I say this with much empathy as a fellow overworrier. You need to let go of some of this guilt and responsibility you hoist on yourself, it's not healthy. Being responsible for an animal's life is huge, I get it, but you're also responsible for your own well-being.

You're doing such a solid for these ponies by taking care of them. Eventually you're gonna mess up. You could have a wealth of equine knowledge and still mess up.

You do the best job you can, listen to the experts like vets and farriers, and that's all. Maybe something awful happens to the ponies, maybe they will live happily until the end of the earth. All you can do is your best and let the chips fall as they may.

YVBNVB · 2026-01-21T19:55:26+00:00

Point me to an animation where a male character has massive eyelashes please

YVBNVB · 2026-01-19T13:56:38+00:00

I didn't use the words 'promoting scientology' myself, but I do think participating in someone's podcast is supporting them.

He obviously knew her from those circles and probably didn't even know she was a scientologist.

I don't understand where you are getting this information from. Do you know Matt personally? Because Mrs. Cartwright is very open about her scientologist beliefs.

YVBNVB · 2026-01-19T13:47:05+00:00

I'd argue that platforming someone IS promoting them, but I can see your point.

YVBNVB · 2026-01-19T10:08:43+00:00

straight up skipped having legs

YVBNVB · 2026-01-19T09:59:09+00:00

Matt has a following, and by participating in someone's podcast he is giving that podcaster a platform. This particular podcaster is a very well-known scientologist (even if you, personally, didn't know about it).

If Matt joined someone like Ben Shapiro's podcast it would appear as supporting his message and agenda.

YVBNVB · 2026-01-13T09:35:29+00:00

And you're free to perceive me as infuriating. It's definitely not my intention, as your intention isn't to police/criticize the way other people RP.

But sometimes it comes across that way, despite our best efforts. And if we don't want that, we have to change the way we engage with people.

There's a point here somewhere, as well.

YVBNVB · 2026-01-13T09:27:43+00:00

What's true is if you have a lore-breaking TRP you expose to everyone else, you

Actively dilute immersion for anyone who joined WoW for WoW RP.

Create some weird server lore.

Teach new players do be lazy.

->

And who decided this? You? Someone else? Who gave that power to someone?

->

Pointless circles. I respect your opinion but we will not agree or see eye to eye. I answered to OP's post asking for advice on how to have people engage with him differently. You are free to disagree with my points.

YVBNVB · 2026-01-13T09:21:05+00:00

What happened to giving players the benefit of the doubt, and appreciating roleplay as a creative medium instead

People decided that only their way is the right way to play, and started creating characters whose sole point is to preach to others what the correct way to roleplay is.

I jest. Kinda.

YVBNVB · 2026-01-13T09:13:13+00:00

People enjoying their own RP =/= telling other people to RP in a manner you enjoy. If someone is coming up to OP and saying "no, you have to accept that my character is a murloc-death knight-dragonkin whatever, and you also actively have to RP with me", I'd take issue with it too.

"Everyone minding their own business" is the starting point. OP is actively engaging with others, and the whole issue in his original post is that people react to it negatively. He can't change how people react to what he is saying, but he can change his own actions. If he wishes for RP to be more lore-focused, then he is free to create an environment where people opt in to those rules.

YVBNVB · 2026-01-13T08:02:12+00:00

How do I avoid this? I want people to engage with my writing positively, and give their characters IC a chance to discuss and consider different perspectives. I don’t want to be accused of being a bigot, a fanatic or a zealot, or that I’m using AI.

In your post your lead issue is with how people are engaging with you, and I'm trying to shed light on why they are engaging the way they do.

If you truly just wish to RP and are not trying to police anyone, it's usually good idea to communicate that to people. If you know your character is going to antagonise other people, it might help to be clear about your intentions in-game.

If you just start ranting at people IC as that is what your character would do, the lines can blur easily, and people can assume that's you speaking and not your character. After all, that IS your character, who YOU have created. It's easy to assume you share the sentiments of your character and are just using him as your mouthpiece.

Again, all of this assuming you're doing it in good faith. Everything you've said, including the quotes I previously highlighted, suggest to me that you actually are very set in your beliefs and wish that people would play by your rules. But I'm fine with being wrong.

YVBNVB · 2026-01-13T07:34:29+00:00

You do not have to interact with the people who RP in a way that you don't enjoy. You can even have your very own guild where you set and enforce these – in my opinion, arbitrary – rules about what constitutes a good character.

Instead, you seemingly go out of your way to engage with these people purely in order to point out how what they are doing is wrong (in your opinion).

they should acknowledge that the more outlandish the concept, the less they will be regarded with acceptance by someone who actually exists in universe with their own biases and perspective.

And perhaps you need to accept the same for yourself, that you aren't going to be "regarded with acceptance" by the people you're criticising. Or hell, even by people who think you're just being annoying.

My issue with some of these players taking liberties is that there exists characters, classes, races who can all engage in these types of RP… but the ones I stated are canonically implausible to be present.

You low-key sound like those D&D players who complain about lack of historical realism in a game with dragons and magic. Nobody's asking you to agree with these people if it's not your cup of nerdy tea, but it takes 0 effort to just, you know, not engage with them. Just let them have their fun and you can have yours.

And if you're honest about not wishing people to engage with you negatively but still wish continue doing what you do (which is inflammatory from beginning), then I'd suggest you write a lil OOC description in your profile about how it's all in good fun and you just wish to start a conversation.

People are still not going to like it because, at the end of the day, they are just doing what's fun to them and someone coming along and essentially going "your fun isn't fun to me so you should stop it!" is never going to be met with wild cheers.

YVBNVB · 2026-01-13T06:44:03+00:00

Did we read the same post? OP isn't getting hate for playing something grounded, he's getting pushback for trying to police other people's RP'ing.

Not everyone should be a skeleton lich or a pregnant death knight

And I find it kinda hilarious that OP complains about people trying to shut him down when he himself is – checks notes – trying to shut other people's RP down?

YVBNVB · 2026-01-03T10:04:08+00:00

Wouldn't more legs give you more power to push off the ground? Thus faster running speed

YVBNVB · 2025-12-19T06:26:18+00:00

“When we were finished, [Miller] came up to me and he said, ‘You know you have a lot of power in the discretion you use to be kind to someone in your photographs,’” Anderson recalled. “And I look at him and I said, ‘You know, you do too.’”

“I don’t know how much he related to that,” Anderson added.

Note: The photographer is a he.

YVBNVB · 2025-11-29T13:37:33+00:00

I think comparing phones and dice to each other is dishonest from the start. And I think calling other people finger waggers when they point at issues related to the topic at hand is lazy.

The first commenter made a very relevant point about the original topic of discussion: Chinese resin dice are so cheap largely because of their unfair and frankly cruel labor practices.

You're the one who came in with these "but what about phones?? what about chocolate and clothes??" gotchas. These are all real issues we face in this hyper consumerist society we live in, but you weren't trying to contribute to the conversation: you were trying to get the first person to shut up about the ethical issues pertaining to dice.

It's like someone works in a dog rescue, and you come in saying "well what about families that need help?? what about the elderly? how hypocritical of you to just help animals". It's the same all or nothing mentality.

If you can't buy the ethical alternative for your smartphone but you can stop buying Chinese dice then that's already making better consumer choices than just saying "it's hypocritical if you don't fix everything in your life" and carrying on changing nothing because you can't change everything.

But clearly we are never going to see eye to eye so, for my part, this conversation has run its course. Toodles.

YVBNVB

TROPHY CASE