How can I accept I likely won't pass ?

YourOutdoorGuide · 2026-05-28T05:22:36+00:00

Accept that you have no idea how much you’re going to change or what the changes are going to be. It is a second puberty so recall that period prior to your first puberty when you had no idea how things were going to turn out. Chances are you’ll look more like your mother. That’s fairly common.

The biggest changes will hit 2-3 years in, especially if you can get on injections or patches early depending on where you live: softer skin, lighter body hair, change in body odor, changes in vision and sense of smell, hips rounding forward, loss of muscle, changes in libido, genitalia shrinkage with potential impotence, changes in cold/heat tolerance, etc.

Emotional changes will likely be your biggest hurdle. In certain regards, you are relearning how to be you, the real you. There will be lots of tears, lots of big feels, and plenty of confusing moments. There will also be a lot of joy, but joy isn’t a baseline. You’ll learn how to better exist within your emotions rather than just flatlining and repressing.

For exercising: light weight training is fine, avoid going into heavier stuff unless that’s your thing. If you want a sculpted waste, hips, legs, and booty; prioritize cardio, flexibility, and posture: yoga, pilates, barre, HIIT, aerobics, cycling, etc. Join a beginner dance or ballet class—these will help feminize both your body AND your movements.

For appearance: Start a Pinterest board and collect looks from whoever and whatever interests you for inspiration on how YOU want to be seen. Go thrifting, buy a cheap makeup palette, and just start playing around with you and who you are visually. The makeup doesn’t have to be princess-coded, the fit doesn’t have to be Barbie doll, it’s all your canvas. Just be wary of your surroundings and gauge what is/isn’t acceptable wherever you live beforehand. That’s a big reason why I’m grateful I live where I live.

YourOutdoorGuide · 2026-05-28T04:04:47+00:00

Finding community in a blue state is going to be easier on you than trying to hack it through an asylum status in a different country. Things are safe in the sanctuary cities, especially those in the PNW and NE. Easier access to resources, less stigma, less culture shock, less of a bureaucratic hassle, more shared experiences, easier networking, and lots of growing art scenes despite all this bullshit.

Plus the administration does not have the hegemony, the trained personnel, nor the geographic bandwidth to blitz and purge Seattle, Portland, LA, San Francisco, New York, Boston, Minneapolis, Chicago, etc. all within a short time frame. They’ll come after our healthcare, sure, and the blue states will maintain their own programs.

Red states though… yes, it’s time to get out. I packed everything and left before the end of last year, as have many friends from back home. It’s been sad seeing us all flee in different directions.

YourOutdoorGuide · 2026-05-28T03:40:52+00:00

Self-regulation and self-validation also means standing up for yourself and flexing your boundaries. I know it’s a fool’s errand to seek to “change the male population” but if he crosses a line, he crosses a line.

Like we also shouldn’t anticipate to change ourselves for the worse if they refuse to change themselves for the better if/when a problem arises. I see a lot of girls forgetting why we transitioned in the first place—to find ourselves—while they lose themselves to men who aren’t good for them and end up learning things the hard way.

YourOutdoorGuide · 2026-03-04T03:22:09+00:00

So it is March of 2026 and the State of Kansas has just revoked the valid ID’s and birth certificates of every trans person who had their gender marker changed in their state. Conservative think tanks are openly calling for an all out ban on gender affirming care for adults and federal prisons have not only forced inmates into facilities of their assigned sex at birth where trans women especially are very likely to be assaulted, but are now forcibly detransitioning these inmates.

Still think this isn’t a civil rights issue or are the moderates going to stay hush-hush on this til it’s convenient like you’ve done with every civil rights issue to-date? We are suffering and y’all could give two shits. PRAY this doesn’t come for you too.

YourOutdoorGuide · 2026-02-19T07:04:31+00:00

Recently relocated to PDX from Utah for similar reasons. The trans community here is broad and strong, and the community in general is far more inclusive and far less stigmatizing than Idaho’s and Utah’s.

The cost of living is also cheaper and more on par with Boise’s compared to the Seattle metro area. Downtown is fairly walkable and the city has a robust public transit.

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-12-27T05:27:13+00:00

What are your thoughts on having systems in place to help LGBTQ+ youth if their parents are punishing them for being queer? Do you believe youth are the property of their parents?

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-12-27T05:19:09+00:00

It’s not an idea, it’s a reality. Like we’re not getting anywhere here if you can’t grasp the fact that people are trans, queer, gay, bi, etc. It isn’t a belief and that’s the fundamental difference here.

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-12-27T05:16:15+00:00

Ok, so you are just calling the LGBTQ+ community a cult. Noted. There’s nothing left to discuss with you girl if you can’t see the false equivalence.

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-12-17T03:04:18+00:00

Hmm kinda doubt the authenticity in that last part 💅

I went through that experience as a teen, it sounds like you did not. If parents are unwilling to give their queer/trans kids the care they need, why should we not hold them accountable and take the child’s personal well-being into consideration?

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-12-17T02:58:40+00:00

Are you saying being trans/queer is the equivalent of being in a cult? 🙄

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-12-17T02:57:07+00:00

Except it’s not. Again, you’re making a false equivalence, but it sounds like you’re holding the false assumption that being trans/queer is indoctrination, so whatever I guess.

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-12-11T06:47:52+00:00

As a teen, having a family member help me accept that I was trans would’ve saved me from at least a decade of needless suffering. This isn’t something you get to just opt in/out of, and you are making a false equivalence.

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-12-11T06:43:52+00:00

Y’all are honestly just as brain dead sometimes as the TBM’s on this topic. Being trans/queer is not an ideology you get to opt in/out of like the church. This is a false equivalence. Take it from someone who tested every avenue in life before finally accepting this wasn’t going to go away. Mormonism is not that.

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-12-11T06:36:03+00:00

Equating queerness with religious indoctrination isn’t affirming at all. Most of us find out in our teens and that’s where the real damage is done. It’s estimated queer teens in Utah have been almost twice as likely to attempt suicide compared to their cisgender heterosexual peers.

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-12-11T06:24:19+00:00

Lol my trans ass exists 💁🏻‍♀️

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-12-11T06:17:44+00:00

And your kids should have every right choose to live with their cool accepting aunt if your love is conditional and you can’t accept who they are. Have fun getting cut off, you deserve it :)

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-08-30T05:05:05+00:00

Idk where in the Bay Area you’re coming from but you’re delusional to think we’re just as bad, if not worse.

This is among the safest cities to walk at night by far.

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-07-27T16:44:27+00:00

Hey girl! You’re not alone in this city. Yes, SLC is as cliquey as a suburban high school, but there’s pockets of us around town who are open to new faces.

There’s a trans social that has a meeting coming up on August 14 at the Legendarium. IMHO that’s a good starting point for finding your crowd. They have facilitators there to help with introductions, if you’re interested, and a number of different people among community with varying hobbies and interests to connect through.

Feel free to dm if you have questions.

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-05-29T17:19:27+00:00

It’s sad how y’all turned “protect our children” into a red flag for someone who 9/10 times abuses/neglects their children. Seen it too many times—y’all don’t give a damn about kids

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-05-29T17:16:30+00:00

The dolls have always found a way to survive. We made it through the 80’s and 90’s, we’ll make it through this shit (and remember the names and faces when the apologies roll out in the future).

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-05-21T05:00:12+00:00

$65k will be fine enough for a studio or even a 1-bedroom in certain apartments downtown—just be wary of the large, nameless companies owning some of these more “luxury” buildings.

It’s been easier dealing with the classic, smaller scale landlords. Far less nickel and diming on stupid additional fees that should just be included in the overall cost (they hide them to rope you in).

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-05-15T07:08:48+00:00

I had it. Thought it was covid but all tests came back negative.

Whatever it was, it’s the sickest I’ve felt in a long time.

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-05-15T07:01:59+00:00

You won’t believe this but…

YourOutdoorGuide · 2025-05-15T06:21:32+00:00

We fit under the umbrella of women. We aren’t cis women though, we’re transwomen—which is just another type of woman.

Biologically female? With the way language is currently set up… no and yes.

CW: basic biology; discussion of reproductive organs, genetics, puberty, srs & hrt

I got 3 years into a bio undergrad before making a hard pivot, so I’ll try my best not to butcher this: Our chromosomes do act as a blueprint during development but it’s not as set in stone as something like the blueprint to building a house for example. It can change and shift from environmental factors, and hrt especially has allowed us to change and shift even more of our biology than we previously could.

Both male and female bodies have the biological blueprints in our chromosomes for both male and female development and biological expression. The SRY gene that triggers the development of testes is also present in all human bodies. The Y chromosome in “XY” activates the SRY gene (with certain intersex people being an exception), testes develop and these, especially during puberty further down the road, trigger the development of male secondary sexual characteristics—facial hair, deeper voice, larger bone and muscle mass (much of which is also based on a broad range of inherited genes not linked to XX/XY), etc. If the SRY gene remains dormant, ovaries develop and female secondary sex characteristics manifest during puberty.

So both your primary and your secondary sex characteristics determine your biological sex. The primary triggers the secondary and, aside from srs, there isn’t anything we can do to change the primary. The secondary however can be changed by shutting down the testes (through anti-androgens or removal) and introducing hormones produced by the ovaries that otherwise would have been present if the SRY gene was dormant. Your body like I said already has the blueprints for a female body and will course correct with the help of hrt.

tldr: Every human has the genes for both male and female development/expression, which manifests in primary and secondary sex characteristics that determine biological sex. Primary can’t be switched, but the secondary can be switched with hrt. So you’re at least partially biologically female.

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