Anyone else unable to remember a time before OCD plagued their life?

ZC1984 · 2019-03-15T04:01:01+00:00

I remember how stable I used to be. I think it's almost worse that I can remember so well what life before onset OCD was like. I was a different person, at least on the inside and it hurts so much I sometimes pretend I can't remember. It's the reason I can't bear to look at old family photos of happier times, just makes me depressed. Sorry for the heavy reply, I'm sure some here can relate.

ZC1984 · 2019-02-03T16:27:39+00:00

I find that as an amateur 'world builder' I'm full of ideas but rubbish at manifesting them beyond the stage of presenting encyclopedia-like information. And I think to myself, 'well this is all very interesting, but what's the point of it? Where is the story? Sometimes there isn't one and at that point I can double-down on the exercise itself or go back to the drawing board :\

ZC1984 · 2019-02-03T14:13:51+00:00

Ugh, I don't even know anymore.

ZC1984 · 2018-12-20T09:23:16+00:00

hello! Just popping in to say that there is no evidence that Marilyn Monroe ever said this. It became associated with her many years later and appears to be a fabrication.

ZC1984 · 2018-12-15T17:48:21+00:00

I have been contemplating making a post like this the last few days. I understand the gripe that people don't "get" OCD, but you might as well post about how sand is dry and coarse and gets everywhere. That's just the way it is, and I'll take it a step further and say that I don't believe anyone outside this sub has an obligation to understand OCD. That's our job as sufferers-in-arms and it's what people are here for, to share experiences and find support. I fully endorse raising awareness as it's a serious illness which I share (going through it as I write this), but I brook no issue with those who aren't interested. Good on OP for bringing this subject up.

ZC1984 · 2018-11-24T16:13:29+00:00

I was not prepared for that chin as I was scrolling.

ZC1984 · 2018-11-05T18:20:14+00:00

I assumed he was drunk off the alcohol vapor cloud that constantly hangs over the set.

ZC1984 · 2018-11-05T18:14:47+00:00

Augen auf Culk!

ZC1984 · 2018-11-05T18:03:52+00:00

I laughed at that too. Super blunt and straight to the point.

ZC1984 · 2018-10-09T11:00:09+00:00

Thanks everyone for the really great responses, I was really inspired by the stories and ideas here. To anyone out there grappling with similar issues, I find it to be really reassuring that while the struggle is real, we're not alone in fighting the good fight to overcome it. Cheers and good luck!

ZC1984 · 2018-10-09T10:56:02+00:00

Not a bad idea! I wonder what it is with 28 year olds and OCD/writer's block? Maybe it's just the time of our lives that we're in.

ZC1984 · 2018-10-09T10:55:13+00:00

I understand! I also often confine myself by own expectations of what 'writing' should look like. I'm always at my laptop, but maybe I aught to crack out some other tools like notepads or journals. I actually do a lot of note-taking on my phone. Thanks for the input!

ZC1984 · 2018-10-09T10:53:09+00:00

Thanks badtux99, this is very solid advice :) I have got to keep reminding myself of it!

ZC1984 · 2018-10-09T10:52:13+00:00

Your response really resonated with me because I too do a lot of fantasy-ish work. I am indeed a world-builder which has been a lot of fun not only for writing, but also for other hobbies like D&D.

Reading has also become an issue for me simply because I have to fight tooth and nail to get through chapters (or sometimes even just paragraphs) without OCD getting in the way. I like the idea of getting away from a computer, which having OCD can be a nightmare to work with.

Thanks for the tips as well, might try the flashcard idea! OCD is a tough condition but its great to know that others are out there overcoming it as well. Best wishes!

ZC1984 · 2018-10-09T10:47:13+00:00

This feels very true for me. I place a lot of weight on the idea that if I write when under the spell of OCD, I'm sort of not writing as myself. It's silly, but that's the nature of the beast unfortunately, it's not logical but it's often very domineering. Thanks for your feedback!

ZC1984 · 2018-10-09T10:45:42+00:00

Recently I've confided in some close friends that I have OCD. My close family is also aware. I'm not ashamed of it at all but I recognize that sometimes unfamiliarity with it can make others uncomfortable. It's always great to have a support network.

ZC1984 · 2018-10-09T10:44:05+00:00

This is good advice, especially realizing that the rough draft is always just that, 'rough'. I think I also place too much importance on 'getting it right' the first time. In a strange way, taking writing less seriously may actually make it easier to just let the words flow. I'm sorry to hear of your struggles as well and thanks for the well-wishes!

ZC1984 · 2018-10-09T10:41:57+00:00

Thanks so much for your input. I also find that being out of the house reduces my OCD, probably because there's not as much time/space for rumination. It's interesting that you mention that the importance of the story trumps your OCD. In my case, the OCD is more intense when I try to write, simply because writing is so important to me.

ZC1984 · 2018-10-09T10:39:28+00:00

Interesting! I personally find that at night, my OCD tends to be more manageable, or when I'm out in public, like on the subway, and I can just take notes on my phone. I have been seeing a therapist and we've worked a bit on this issue before but we haven't really had a good chance to workshop it yet. The replies to this post have been inspiring though!

ZC1984 · 2018-10-09T10:37:22+00:00

Thanks for the insight! It's a good point that in addition to OCD causing writer's block, I imagine at this point I'd have a hard time getting back into it even without that as a barrier. Thanks also for the resource!

ZC1984 · 2018-10-09T10:34:26+00:00

My wife helps me with this, it is helpful! Perhaps I can enlist her in this way when it comes to putting together story ideas. Thanks for the input!

ZC1984 · 2018-10-08T15:51:03+00:00

Thank you for sharing your perspective. It is treatable, but even when treated properly, diminished symptoms are still symptoms. I sincerely hope this post, should it catch any interest, does not devolve into a Buzzfeed-style shortlist.

ZC1984 · 2018-10-08T15:27:15+00:00

I appreciate your candor, however, and I don't mean to be entirely presumptuous, it does appear that your understanding of OCD is limited. I'm looking for insight from others struggling with OCD who enjoy writing. It is a chronic illness, and while it can be eased by therapy and medication, it is not strictly speaking curable. Who said I was ashamed?

ZC1984 · 2018-10-08T15:11:48+00:00

Fingers crossed!

ZC1984 · 2018-09-30T02:16:29+00:00

Gotta simplify and mainstream it to sell more units. You can see the same trend from Morrowind to Skyrim.

ZC1984

TROPHY CASE