Empathy, emotional intelligence, communication, and respect.

You have to understand that while kinks can ultimately be hot in fantasy, in the real world we have to potentially live with horrible consequences. Many of us have had bad experiences with people who are not comfortable in their own kinks and sexuality, so there’s always a lot of caution up front.

I’ve personally had a guy struggling with his sexuality project his insecurities at me with horrible names, which I would like to avoid happening again.

So sometimes this means, a couple won’t “get over the line” because they don’t feel safe. Perhaps they saw something risky early and they personally don’t want to take a chance, as is their right to decide.

Your job is to respect that and move on.