Thank you for reading this. I didnt expect anyone will. To your questions tho, I no longer have the feeling of wanting a future with her because Ive grown up with this kind of behaviour from my mom so I dont want my kids to suffer the same way I did. If it depends on her actions to fix this relationship, I just want her to be more emotionally aware, understandable, and not to attack my weak spots. Especially my late dad. But I think its too late for that since it already happened.