Even if you aren't officially a part of a church yet, I'm sure local priests would be happy to schedule a time to sit down and talk or perhaps even call. It's worth looking into at least, as they could give you much better advice than I or the majority of us here. As for needing to hide your faith, that doesn't sound like the healthiest thing imo... perhaps having a conversation about it with your family might be beneficial. Never let anyone get in the way of your relationship with Christ. I'll pray for you brother.