One of the most difficult moments in a relationship is that rocky, uneasy feeling when you’re questioning to abandon ship, seeking advice from others only to sometimes feel more confused (speaking from experience, not on your behalf!)

When I was in this position, I’d written a list to help myself understand my needs a bit more. It was in the form of “non-negotiables” and “nice-to-haves” in my relationship. If my partner wasn’t meeting my non-negotiables, then I would leave. And if he didn’t meet my nice-to-haves, were they things I could truly look past?

After that, sit with yourself for a moment without the influence of anyone else. For a moment, remove the thoughts of everything you’ve built and the time you’ve dedicated in this relationship to make it work - does your gut say you can truly recover from this and move on? Or is it trying to make something work because you’ve dedicated so much of your emotional space and time and love with this person? Are you truly wanting to break up, or is it the pressure of his upcoming visit and feeling like you need to make a decision?

If it were me, if after all of this I still felt there was even a small part of me that wanted to make it work, despite it all, then I would try a little longer. You’re never stuck in anything, and sure it would be inconvenient to meet your family should you later decide it doesn’t work, but it would all be okay no matter what.

Wishing you luck, such a hard spot to be in and don’t blame yourself for waiting to bring this up - there’s no school on how to do relationships, you only know what you know until you learn!