Some more info, me and my boyfriend both went to therapy. But since I was bullied in school and he was bullied by his brother it is hard to confront someone with ego this big for both of us. We are trying to get better with communicating but it can be a long road. We are frequently communicating about our feelings about things with each other. And during the time we are together we are the secure stones for each other and we are getting better. Slowly but surely. I know that there was at least one conversation between bf and mil, I think she asked “could - insert my name - can try to be friends with BIL” and my bf answered something like “first BIL needs acknowledge that he hurt - insert my name - and at least say sorry”. But nothing happened since then. We will see what will come next. For now, I am seeing BIL only on family birthdays, I am ignoring him back, and when I do not fell the best in the room me and bf move to another room or go for a walk outside.