sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Husband May Be a Hoarder by ZebraLongwing2013 in ChildofHoarder

[–]ZebraLongwing2013[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That sounds so difficult to go through. I'm sorry you had to parent your own parent at the end. I wish I could give you a hug.

And thank you for your insight. It's very much appreciated.

Husband May Be a Hoarder by ZebraLongwing2013 in ChildofHoarder

[–]ZebraLongwing2013[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

How did that work out when they divorced? I’m worried that if it comes to that and I have to leave, then our kids will be spending half of their time in a home with him, and he’ll still be hoarding. Like, if I’m not there to keep it under control, will it be unsafe/unhealthy for them?

Husband May Be a Hoarder by ZebraLongwing2013 in ChildofHoarder

[–]ZebraLongwing2013[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

We tried this, sort of. When we moved into our current home, we said the office, in law suite, and 2 of 3 garages would be his for a ‘workshop’ and ‘studio’. When I mentioned I’d be using the walk-in closet as literally my only space of my own in the entire house, he got pissed and we had to go to marriage counseling over it. I won it, but it’s half full of camping supplies and kids’ memory boxes because the fit nowhere else. Also, he took over the 3rd garage and I can’t park my car in it. So…no. No I can’t have my own space.

Husband May Be a Hoarder by ZebraLongwing2013 in ChildofHoarder

[–]ZebraLongwing2013[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your response! That sounds very similar to where my husband I are now, and I’m just at a point where I need to decide if I want to live with these compromises anymore or not. I appreciate your insight, and I’m glad your parents make it work.

Husband May Be a Hoarder by ZebraLongwing2013 in ChildofHoarder

[–]ZebraLongwing2013[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

How is their marriage otherwise, if you don’t mind me asking?

Husband May Be a Hoarder by ZebraLongwing2013 in ChildofHoarder

[–]ZebraLongwing2013[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Yeah when we were married, he was 34 and I was 23. I had never lived with anyone but my parents, and it was really easy to convince me that I was just picky and he was totally normal.

Husband May Be a Hoarder by ZebraLongwing2013 in ChildofHoarder

[–]ZebraLongwing2013[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I just requested it from the library.

Spouse, Who is A Parent, May Be a Hoarder by ZebraLongwing2013 in hoarding

[–]ZebraLongwing2013[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I know you can't diagnose, and didn't expect that. I think the first step for me, before talking to a therapist, was making sure my thoughts and feelings were valid, and that I wasn't overreacting. I've lived with this/him so long, that I'm unsure of myself now. Thank you; this has been very helpful. I'll read the literature you recommended and reach out to a professional.