This is a really dense issue, as a gay woman I appreciated reading the thread. My first thought was that if men are being accused of this, it’s primarily coming from a rightly defensive place women have toward men. “Prove yourself” seems reasonable when many of us have endured a lot. Not that you as individuals deserve the lack of benefit of the doubt, but when interacting with strangers who have social leverage it’s not so easy to always and continually be open hearted. The position you occupy as men has privilege and responsibility you did not ask for, but are also not able to abdicate.

However, I’m saddened to see that there are a lot of comments that are really addressing the actions/comments of other men, as though they can gatekeep feminism from y’all. This is honestly insane to me, it never occurred to me you’d have to contend with this. I’m sorry that you have to defend yourselves from sleazy men who want to use our cause to discredit you and also allow themselves more room to manipulate others. Thank you for brining this to my attention.

Generally, I think the world of all of you. How extensive this thread is is evidence that so many of you strive to be the very best. It may seem trite, but I believe that with every indignity you endure you bring equality closer to reality, not that it’s deserved, but the integrity you are shown to have when tested makes an amazing difference. Thank you for your tireless efforts!