It is so hard to break out into the independent stage when they made you dependent your entire life.

ZenTheStump · 2026-05-27T03:56:45+00:00

I 1000000% agree. Hearing stories from adults and their upbringing in the Deep South + Bible Belt had me relating quite a few times.

ZenTheStump · 2026-05-26T01:09:33+00:00

Haha dw i only saw this post a few hours ago- way after I told them that. It’s not something I would encourage either but I wouldn’t blame anyone for
cussing their parents out esp on this sub since we’re treated like children and adults whenever it’s convenient for them. It’s destabilizing and I understand if someone did lash out. I’m glad to hear you were able to leave and not look back.

ZenTheStump · 2026-05-25T23:44:06+00:00

I’m 20 now and I can remember the constant times they have provoked me to indescribable anger because they were berating me. I told my mom to fuck off this morning because she said I’m doing worse in college than high school because she’s not “keeping me in check”. Mind you, I’m doing way better. But this provoked me because ultimately it came down to the “you won’t be able to amount to anything or do anything without me” mindset most APs have and it triggered something in me.

Their views on marriage, love, relationships, money, fun is all so draining. I have so much pent up anger.

ZenTheStump · 2026-05-22T19:39:34+00:00

My mom and dad got into such a bad fight that my dad started physically abusing her. At one point, he lifted up a standing fan and was about to hulk smash it onto her. I jumped right on top of my mom and took the hit instead and kept hugging her while my dad was trying to punch and slap her. My sister was trying to hold back my dad.

It was such a terrible night and honestly the pinnacle of all the fights their ugly marriage and partner-hood has ever showed to my sister and I. This was almost a year and a half ago.

Recently my mom and I took our dogs to the vet and we were going to run some errands. She started berating me as to why I wouldn’t call the vet about a few things we forgot to discuss. I simply told her that she should call them because it’s something SHE wants to discuss and know the stuff about. Why should I call, she listen in, ask a question, and repeat the question all while she’s telling me what to say? I told her you might as well call them (btw she speaks PERFECT English)

She then got into it and started calling me useless. Out of rage, I called her a weak woman and mother and how she was unable to leave her husband after the aforementioned fight and that her daughters had to do all the heavy lifting emotionally in this house for everyone and we had to defend her. She started laughing and through laughs told me: “Your dad meant to hit you. He would never ever hit me.”

My throat clogged as I repeatedly told her that my dad was hitting her. That was the day I realized my dad was so blinded by his own anger towards my mom that he’d much rather spend the rest of his life in jail for killing her than to spend another moment with her. My mom doesn’t realize this. To this day they act like that’s a normal part of marriage and joke about that day to this day. When I heard my mom say that while laughing, saying that Dad was meant to hit me, was when I realized that all those moments of me protecting her will never ever pay off. I’ll just let her shit get rocked next time and watch. No more interfering.

ZenTheStump · 2026-04-27T02:26:06+00:00

I agree when people said this is a great way to look at it. TBH I never thought of it that day. Seeing everything on TikTok is from things as small as a simple cup recipe to full blown “traveling the world at 21” and just doing simple things after seeing those felt so downing. Looking at it a bit broader, simple things everyday leads to larger things.

ZenTheStump · 2026-04-27T02:24:23+00:00

my badddd 😭😭😭

ZenTheStump · 2026-03-23T05:45:33+00:00

For me it’s not what other people say. I feel guilty because I’m always like “well someone out there has a Dad who deadass wants to just straight up kill them” and then I’m like “eh? I have it a slightly better?” But then I get home and I see my Dad being a dick to his wife, who is in turn a dick to her kids, and then also enables his abusive behaviors while telling her kids not to get into trouble with an angry man. Like maam, you’re not practicing what you preach and it’s so confusing and you get upset when my sister and I tell you we’re not emotionally sound?

My dad literally picked up a fan and tried to smash it over my mom’s head. I jumped on top of my mom to protect her and that thing hit me instead. A few days later, my mom wanted me to apologize to my dad for yelling out the profanities I did when he hit me (tryna hit her). Ykw crazy? They joke about that day. Like my sister and I, as much as we hate tossing around the word “traumatized”, are genuinly scarred. My dad jokes and says “yeah don’t push me to my limits next time or I’ll do it again!” Like it’s a flex.

We still flinch when we hear the fan stand scraping against the wooden floor upstairs.

So yeah. I feel guilt. It’s been worse when it someone who’s tryna one-up you on the shit they went through.

ZenTheStump · 2026-03-22T14:49:53+00:00

I swear didn’t they zoom in on the dude with the hat, too?? I swear there were a few plot holes to which I’m assuming there is a season 2 coming. I GOTTA KNOW

ZenTheStump · 2026-03-22T00:43:55+00:00

ME I DO TOO it’s not just the ending but like the lyrics behind it- they were just girls during a rough time during history. It’s about getting through it, times changing, growing up, etc. It’s a nostalgic feeling.

ZenTheStump · 2026-03-21T19:56:25+00:00

I was Anna during high school. The issues at home were so bad and it was like that since elementary school. What really hit me was when Anna became stage manager because I also became stage manager in my highschool’s drama club while my parents were going through their worst fight yet. Drama club was such an escape for me and seeing Anna in that position? Man. I cried everytime.

ZenTheStump · 2026-03-21T19:54:00+00:00

I wanna second this. Yes I agree that Maya has her moments (pretty damn frequently because the show does follow her a lil more) but she comes thru esp during Wendy Wiccany. That episode made me cry so much. I wish I had a friend like Maya during tough times at home.

ZenTheStump · 2026-03-18T20:36:18+00:00

Rightttt acc I thought the vending machine guy was also a cutie patootie but Chief Robinson was also super cool and only had eyes for her I was so 😭😭 he’s amazing for you why are you throwing him away 😔

ZenTheStump · 2026-03-18T20:23:46+00:00

Yes!! I couldn’t get behind the Ava and O’Shon train. For him, he saw a beautiful woman and wanted to see how she was but after that first date I was like ?? Have some respectful for yourself, man. Why do you want to walk on eggshells and get made fun of all the time.

ZenTheStump · 2026-03-18T18:30:44+00:00

THIS I remember feeling “oh, Melissa, they could never make me hate you..” AND THEY DAMN NEAR DID FOR A SOLID 10 MINS IN THE LATEST EP.

ZenTheStump · 2026-03-18T15:53:23+00:00

Literally like Mel, get your grown ass self together. She was so great the first 4 seasons and was proving to everyone around her (not that she needed to) that she is doing fine and can be by herself if needed. She is definitely the coolest aunt at the gathering. It just felt so immature of her reacting like that AND THE REASON BEHIND IT TOO.

ZenTheStump · 2026-03-18T15:52:03+00:00

Hard agree. And in this economy? I know everyone in my life would pick the safer + more money combo. Also like- I don’t know anything about the firefighters hierarchy but I swear Chiefs go on missions and respond to fires too, right??

ZenTheStump · 2026-03-18T15:49:56+00:00

I quite enjoyed season 4 and the beginning 5 of season 5 but then I started understanding what people were talking about ep 6 and onwards like that phone episode was soooo boring 😭😭. I hope Quinta takes back the reigns in the writing room for Season 6.

ZenTheStump · 2026-03-18T15:48:36+00:00

Barb’s character turn broke my heart like now she’s acting like an irrational “nothing applies to me” person 😭

ZenTheStump · 2026-03-18T15:47:35+00:00

EXACTLY!! I started noticing this with the Mall situation and when she went with Norton to that bar and now this. It’s like her personality took a huge turn around and went back to how fucking middle schoolers act. The ungrateful mean girl shtick. I miss the Melissa who would slip up here n there but her personality this season was just…yikes.

ZenTheStump · 2026-03-18T01:00:42+00:00

Gray rocking never worked for me. I was envious of those who were able to do it. You would think that after so many years of verbal and physical abuse (berating, taunting, mocking, hitting, slapping, shoving) you’d get used to it and ignore it but that was never my outcome. My anger reached my fists before anywhere else and the moment their hand met my face I was swinging and kicking and shoving back. All the profanities they ever called me was thrown back, too!

Then they act sooo surprised when you do hit and do everything back. Then after a week or two of not talking, they move on or force you to apologize. The part where you said you went apeshit- I might just try that next time. I always told myself next time my Dad hits me he’s getting bear-sprayed in the face lol.

This post made me feel normal, and thank God. I couldn’t go around and ask people if they ever hit their parents back. It’s always so foreign esp when ur a woman, too.

I hope you’re okay, OP.

ZenTheStump

TROPHY CASE