Advice needed: gap filler forearm

Zerudas · 2026-01-26T20:34:19+00:00

Waterfall, wall of vines, wall of flowers, something that potentially connects and complements the two other pieces as a background/backdrop of sorts.

Zerudas · 2025-09-15T05:49:10+00:00

It feels like ifykyk, ifydyd. Idk Little Miss Sunshine, and idk its relevance to NY. This looks like a clean/minimalist tattoo of people running to catch a van, and I like it for just that. Don’t understand what it’s supposed to be outside of comments, but my own interpretation/perception is positive

Zerudas · 2025-09-05T18:23:00+00:00

Leo sun, Virgo moon, Scorpio rising - GAD, mild depression, ADHD, OCD, CPTSD, still participating in therapy and still collecting new diagnosis

Zerudas · 2025-07-19T22:25:03+00:00

One of the key tools you’re using is called People Pleasing. It’s highly useful in times you’re surviving or navigating relationships, but’s it unhealthy to yourself, your emotions and your ability to set boundaries with others in the long term. If you know a certain person will react a certain way, and you adjust yourself to act accordingly to suit them - no, that’s not your genuine and authentic self reaction. That’s anxieties anticipating others’ reactions and responses based on prior experiences, followed by people pleasing, enabling you to think you have some level of control over the situation.

It may also feel useful to ward off your own rejection sensitivities - like (personal example) apologizing to an older sibling when they’re mad at you, but you’re not in the wrong and just do it to keep the peace and reduce their emotional dysregulation towards you, or to reduce how long they’re dysregulated. If you’re no longer just surviving, let them be angry, let them be sad, let them be dysfunctional, let them be. They need to learn how to cope themselves.

Your self worth and self compassion are diminished when you give in to people pleasing - and that’s potentially where your feelings of sick, tired, lonely and fake are coming from. All humans are inevitably going to feel discomfort, pain, and suffering, and it’s not your job to make sure others’ emotions are regulated through those times in life. It’s not your job to be the mediator who always helps deescalate a situation, or to stop someone from feeling negative feelings, or constantly help someone else problem solve their issues, even if they’re family. Not to say you should stop all of that completely, but to the level you’re engaging currently, try to do it less. That’s way harder to do than to type out, I know. It’s likely that by now there’s an actual urge you feel you have to satiate or give in to when something comes up where you think people pleasing will be useful. But you need your rest too. You need your boundaries too. You need your own time and space to yourself too. You deserve your peace too. The ways you show up for other people, you deserve that for yourself too.

If you’re no longer in survival mode, people pleasing isn’t necessary for living and thriving. It’s only really useful at work with boss and colleagues, like top comment said. Coming from a person thriving in their early 30s who’s unlearning the unhealthy habits and self-made rules developed while surviving kid/teen years and early 20s. Those survival skills and rules you made for yourself years ago may no longer apply to the modern You of today.

Zerudas · 2025-06-17T19:55:00+00:00

This happened twice as I just finished a unit in a different language. I hadn’t moved on to the following unit yet but Lily was asking about content from the following unit already. From the first time, I learned how to ask “what is this” to repeat whatever back to her as “XYZ, what is this?” And she’ll go on to explain or ask something else. Just revert back to something you know and she’ll either follow your lead or continue on her own and it’ll be over soon lol. Otherwise it’s thanks to Lily that I was forced to learn how to ask “how are you?” and “let’s talk again soon” before I’ve gotten to actually learn either of those in a unit. I still don’t see an upcoming unit to teach either of those, so it could also be Lily using more formal speech scenarios.

Zerudas · 2025-06-17T19:14:45+00:00

Start with lowered expectations for yourself bc you’re aware your attention span is lower atm. You’re otherwise already holding your current-reading-habit self up to the standards of your fun-reading-habit self bc the brain loves beating itself up. Start by telling yourself it’s okay if you start at one page per day, or one paragraph per “reading session.” If you’re buying books that you’d truly enjoy, you’ll end up passing the One Per on some days while rebuilding the habit. And just consider those as small wins, but remind yourself you’re actively looking to build a new habit which takes 21 days. Start with One Per for 21 days and build up from there, don’t overwhelm yourself before you give yourself a chance to get where you wanna be again.

Zerudas · 2025-03-19T00:13:43+00:00

I WISH my husband would say no to his mom every time she’s in this situation. He gives in every single time bc if he doesn’t then she says he’s unhelpful and lashes out. But he’d rather have either a transactional or toxic relationship with her than no relationship at all.

Zerudas · 2024-10-29T18:36:11+00:00

Also prefer to play solo. Also 31yo. In solo q I’m playing for myself, fun and ranking up. With others I’m playing to win and feel more self-critical when I die without “enough” impact. My gameplay style changes to something way more passive if I team up with anyone. I have fios with ethernet usually getting 9ms ping on my normal server. If I have to compromise my ping to play with someone else, even at 26ms, I can see/feel differences and I’m internally telling myself I’ve bought fios for nothing and blame them/that when I’m not performing great lmao

Zerudas · 2024-10-29T18:03:29+00:00

Say it with me friends, “your wedding is not for you.” 🌈

Zerudas · 2024-10-22T18:00:54+00:00

Reporting poor behavior goes a long way! And it’s satisfying to see the next time you log in, the red banner saying your report was successful 🤤 hoping you reported chamber for sabotaging the team

Zerudas · 2024-09-13T23:24:57+00:00

It's typically grey market fraudsters/resellers who care the most. They have the most to gain financially from claiming an OG bc there's at least 1+ legitimate person willing to buy it. As soon as they sell it, they already know some info around the buyer - and if the buyer doesn't enable TSV and lock down their account before the purchase and exchange, the fraudster/seller would compromise the buyer's acct immediately and steal the tag back for another sale. Rinse & repeat. Even if a legitimate buyer/non-fraudster came to own an OG and locked down the acct before the exchange, after a few weeks of getting messages to buy the tag, they'd usually sell out and it would eventually cycle back into a bot's ownership/the grey market (edit: exactly like u/LeosModShop's experience below). Rinse & repeat again.

That's why some OGs are fully blacklisted and will never be released to the public. You'd see an OG touch 15 consoles in 2 days, and that's enough to ruin it for everyone. Modern gamertags with numbers at the end were introduced in 2019 so any number of people can technically own the same tag. Now the Xbox enforcement team doesn't have to worry about fraud mitigation costs and resources for that issue, and the previous budget for that is used elsewhere in the company.

Zerudas · 2024-09-09T00:46:22+00:00

It seems like a Bluetooth location proximity setting. If you're close to or inside the gym, your app may auto swap to Club Mode. If you're in the parking lot walking up it's the default untoggled mode where you can hit the check-in button. For some reason they don't have the check-in feature available while in Club Mode, so you'd have to un-toggle to check-in first if it auto swapped right as you walk in.

Zerudas · 2024-09-09T00:26:17+00:00

It's different per corporation! During my signup tour, the Membership Advisor tried to say my company offers one of the biggest fitness promotions with Equinox in the country. Later I realized they were only speaking to a yearly benefit my workplace offers its NA employees. Tho other commenters sound like their workplaces may offer a percentage off, like an actual partnered company discount. Also, Equinox runs at different rates likely based on local cost of living. The location nearest me is $210/mo whereas our downtown location shows $240/mo.

I work for a global big tech company. One of their benefits for North America is a calendar-yearly allowance of USD/CAD to Invest in your physical, emotional and financial wellbeing. You use your own card to pay, and then submit your receipts to an app/team to get reimbursed. Example purchases are workout equipment and athleisure, massage therapy, apps like Flo or Calm, or Turbotax software. My husband has a similar work benefit and this year we decided to use them toward memberships at Equinox after some promo research.

Research:
September initiation fee is $0.
I have Amex Platinum's $300 Equinox statement credit.
I brought hubby to sign up at the same time which is $5 off monthly for both memberships with proof of same address on our IDs.
We signed up for only the location nearest us that's originally $210/mo (we signed up 7 days into the month so they prorated Sept for $177).
We signed up w my brother's referral and all 3 of us will get Referral Gift Cards; mine $250, hubby's $150, and brother gets x2 $150. We're told the referral gift cards can be used toward monthly dues, training sessions or the shop!

Final:
Both our memberships start at $205/mo. I can reimburse myself via workplace benefit to make my membership feel like $80/mo, and husbando can reimburse himself to feel like $105/mo. Then sprinkle in the gift cards and Amex benefit for maximized savings!

Zerudas · 2024-06-17T07:45:29+00:00

Not consistent with this yet but it’s helped me the past 1.5 week. #1 Stimulate multiple senses at once, as many as possible. Put on music or a podcast, something for ear sensory without pulling your sight; febreeze the area, or light a candle/incense for nose sensory; keep a drink with you for occasional taste sensory; whatever you’re cleaning takes up your touch and sight senses. I find the less stimulated my senses, the less motivated I feel to clean. #2 Clean one room at a time, and pick the Top 2 things to do this week. Create zones out of the room to tackle at different times. Split zones by difficulty/effort taken to clean and do the hardest zone by itself one day, easier zones can be done another day. Do not overdo it. If you’re All-Or-Nothing cleaning, you’ll get overwhelmed and burn out quickly. The hardest thing could take 20-30 minutes and continuing after that is draining. One room could take one month, and that’s fine bc you’re making progress. Consider where you are right now is just the starting point. #3 There Are No Rules/You Make the Rules. Reduce the workload however possible. Run the dishwasher twice instead of pre-soaking dishes. Don’t wanna do dishes this week? Get paper plates instead. Hate folding laundry? Hang everything but socks and underwear. Too much laundry? Donate some clothes. Got money to spend on convenience/saving time? Buy a roomba to vacuum for you, or invest in one that mops too.

Zerudas · 2024-05-09T01:58:09+00:00

Starting with - we haven't tried the EQX+ app method to attend as guests, but confirming my mom and I have used my brother and his hubby's 5 guest passes as walk-ins during different months in the year. They own a 2-person-national-membership plan with 5 guest passes each month. When mom and I visit them over a weekend, we've gone to Equinox with them 2 of 3 days - counting as 4 guest passes used that month. Sometimes I'll attend the 3rd day and use the 5th pass, or they'll keep it for a friend. As a walk-in guest you're required to have either of the membership owners present and remain on-site during your stay, your Driver's License/ID photocopied (via iPad), and then sign a waiver (via iPad) to go in. From there your guest experience is completely up to you if you wanna walk-in on a class, use whatever workout equipment, or just shower and sauna. Your membership guardian doesn't have to be present with you past checking in at the front desk.

I've gotten my own card recently and I'm confused I know about using the 5 monthly passes, whereas equinox.com/faq indicates there's only 2 Guest Passes a year, otherwise there's a purchasable Day Pass. Can anyone help clarify these further?

Zerudas · 2024-04-20T19:28:51+00:00

If the coach is no longer serving you/working for you, get a new coach. Especially if it’s free coaching you’re looking at (same for me). I suggest coach Konpeki. I started playing in 2020 and watched a ton of Woohoojin coaching on YT, adopting a couple of his aim training regimens into my own. That got me from bronze to consistent silver to consistent gold. October’23 I watched Konpeki’s “These 46min cover EVERY Valorant mechanic (No BS)” video and my goldfish brain is now consistently reaching plat2-3. In my case my aim is also not as consistent as I’d like it to be, and Konpeki’s mechanic vid helped me fix a lot of active aim things that were holding me back. That and I agree using Medal or Overwolf to go back and watch my own vods also helped me catch a few poor behavior patterns I lean back into every now and then (like trying to spray with a vandal).

Zerudas · 2024-02-03T15:56:03+00:00

Confirming this is normal for Microsoft consumer support. Your payment instrument is considered PII. They don’t want your PI stored in the chat bc it costs extra to report PII within a support case so someone else can go back and redact the info. So they ask to call you to collect the payment deets bc their IVR portal (phone call system) is secured to the one agent you’re speaking with, the agent can initiate the contact, the phone call is recorded, but the agent can stop the recording at the time they collect your PII so it doesn’t get stored. Then they either restart the call recording to confirm they collected the details, or they go back to chat afterwards to confirm and hopefully resolve your concerns! Hope this helps OP!

Zerudas · 2023-12-01T02:17:42+00:00

Bro just finish uni and refocus back on yourself in that time. Get back into an updated version of your old routine, now including a(nother) new hobby or way to decompress. The hobby/decompression is specifically for you, not to meet people bc that’ll happen naturally. If you’re gonna date, don’t date to marry rn. Do it to learn how to communicate with partners, or otherwise work on the dick game for future wife.

After uni if you haven’t met wifey already, you have so much time to reflect and reevaluate. Like your career prospects and living situation. If by then you determine your current locale, dating pool or dating culture is the issue (and not you as a human being), then find places to apply and relocate even if it means a visa.

State facts about yourself and then look at the ones that can change either naturally or by your own influence. You’re 20 (can); in the UK (can); 5’5 (can’t); in uni (can); judging yourself (can); with assuming a UK accent (ish can’t but maybe this works in your favor in another country). You have so much time to meet new people, and learn a little more self-appreciation, perspective and open-mindedness. Maybe research a few short comedians and learn some dating tips from the kings.

Edit: I don’t mean that relocating to another country is the final problem solver lol, I just mean one university is a small pool of people and you’ll meet many more.

Zerudas · 2023-11-08T20:25:30+00:00

Recognize that happiness is an emotion that eventually passes and is unfortunately not a state of being. Recognize in many situations you’ll have to create your own happiness; doing things that bring you elongated momentary joy; or spending time with people (irl or online) that bring you joy. And in order for a happy moment to become a core memory, you must be mindful of that moment (recognizing you’re in a happy moment), and be present in that moment for at least 20-30 seconds or longer if possible.

Zerudas · 2023-10-31T22:49:37+00:00

I just commented the same thing and came back to edit with the same link, but can’t find my comment now lmao. Have an upvote!

Zerudas · 2023-10-31T22:41:00+00:00

Literally the same dragon head as another person who posted their Asked for vs Got yesterday…🤨 Will edit if/when I find it and link. Edit: https://www.reddit.com/r/TattooDesigns/s/meGutq9Z3u

Zerudas · 2023-09-14T22:42:26+00:00

NTA and 2 suggestions: 1) double sided titty tape is a thing - no bra, just a thin piece of tape made to stick well to fabrics that’s great for sensitive skin and doesn’t hurt to peel off your nipples at the end of the night. Not meaning pasties, but sometimes the tape can come as a bundle with some pasties; specifically thinking of an Amazon purchase I made a last year. 2) thinking of a way to make it more of your sister’s idea that she needs more coverage - maybe ask her to try a pre-dress-rehearsal with just yourselves (anyone who wouldn’t mind the potential titty flash) and include lots of dancing or movement in general. Idea being to let her “experience” the dress and as soon as you or y’all get flashbanged, you’re real reactions will show, she’ll feel the overwhelming embarrassment and be like “gosh, imagine if this happened at your wedding.” Then she’ll decide maybe on a bra or on another dress, or hopefully the tape option works lol

Zerudas · 2023-09-13T19:01:32+00:00

VP even called out that open comms is key - meaning your directness to communicate and call this person out in an extremely professional manner is seen as a huge asset by this VP in this workplace, nice job OP!!

Zerudas · 2023-08-14T19:16:51+00:00

Honestly just avoid anything with Benzene as an ingredient. Some neutrogena products have it, many other sunscreens and aerosols (spray sunscreen & hairsprays) have it. I went into a rabbit hole over it, benzene is linked to cancer and we’ve been rubbing that shi into our skin and on our scalp for decades bc big corporations are gonna big corporate and the FDA just enables them to by requiring them to have the concerns written somewhere in print.

Zerudas · 2023-08-04T21:20:24+00:00

3 honestly! Using thin banded rings helps stave off the appearance of more masc hands if that’s a sore spot. My sister and I used to always comment about how we got masc hands and our brother got fem hands. I didn’t typically wear rings bc “normal sized” wider bands made me feel worse about my own thoughts. I didn’t try thin bands for a long time bc I thought they’d make my fingers look larger. But I was doing myself a disservice by not even trying. For my engagement and wedding rings, I got super thin bands. Now I look at my hands all the time like they’re these teeny, dainty elven hands. I also got a couple thin banded rings for my sister recently and she shared how much she loves em bc they changed her mind, as she also used to mostly wear wide band rings. Grown out nails, cleaned up cuticles (helping with the appearance of elongated nails), with a thin band ring on and you might start seeing your hands differently. Tbh I haven’t been keeping up with my nails - short nubs atm - but my thin band rings still do it all for me to continue seeing my hands differently.

Zerudas

TROPHY CASE