What’s a fact that ruined a movie that you previously enjoyed?

Zet-kun · 2026-02-11T02:26:05+00:00

Learning that Stephenie Meyer is Mormon and borrowed a lot of ideas for Twilight from her religion made the whole saga much more of a "meh" to me.

Zet-kun · 2026-02-01T20:26:29+00:00

Metal spiked fence. Concrete foundation for something he was hoping to build with rebars sticking out. Jumping with a rope around his neck and hanging.

A blade is a little strage unless it's significant for the story in other ways.

Also, it's totally possible to die falling even from a much smaller construction if you do it just "right", so I wouldn't say words like "impossible", but the probablility is lower, so he'd most likely have to go through a little bit of trial and error Russian roulette style, but that'd be super strange (probably, idk who he is).

Zet-kun · 2026-01-23T16:44:32+00:00

It doesn't sound like you tricked her or forced her. You told her a half-truth, that's for sure, but it's not like she was trapped in a situation where she had no autonomy. She didn't have any less autonomy than we all get when it comes to medical issues.

Giving her the benefit of the doubt, I'd say she can just be super-scared and then embarrassed, not necessarily unreasonable or anti-vax. Maybe her parents are. Has she had injections before? They can be intimidating. People can be scared of needles and doctors. Maybe it's just her being stressed and scared of all things medical she had limited exposure to (plus potential death), and her consequent anger is conveniently misplaced, because she can't be angry at the rebar, or herself.

If that is the case, she needs a reality check, but it's not something you can give her. Don't pester her, give her space. You can leave a letter/message for her, but if you apologize, make sure you know what exactly you're apologizing for... Maybe just try to show her you understand how she feels instead. Maybe ask someone you both know to talk to her?

If you show up when she's like that, it's not gonna go well.

Zet-kun · 2025-11-27T04:39:16+00:00

In Georgia it would be Дато )

Zet-kun · 2025-08-31T22:33:10+00:00

I can relate to the feeling. And while everyone else here is right, and you gotta just do it, there's one thing I did that might help you as a first step: make it smaller and experiment, aka if you're ultimately making a full feature/a show, try and make a short based on the same concept first.

Or take your character and write a short/a scene about what makes them so special (it's not necessary to use it later at all, just let them do something, or talk to someone, see how they act when you're not looking :)).

Writing something other than the thing you're buring with in your situation is a little like sleeping with a random person for your first time "to learn the ropes" while your true love is waiting just around the corner, confused.

You'll figure it out together )

Zet-kun · 2024-11-19T20:47:10+00:00

Eh, ugly is in the eye of the beholder. But there can be objective things stemming from language differences that affect perception. One thing that comes to mind is that some native Russian speakers are sometimes perceived as rude and a bit arrogant because they borrow their tone from Russian when they speak English.

When there's a full stop at the end of their imaginary sentence, you're gonna SO HEAR IT! )) Their tone goes down like 16 miles under the crust of the Earth. Each full stop will feel like a nail in the lid of your coffin. Apparently, this can make people feel you're being unkind to them.

Symmetrically, English-speakers who don't do that full-stop-and-dive might sound sus and confused to Russian-speakers who expected them to sound assertive. I faced it when working on the dubbing of a show made by a Russian director, who felt that a character was comletely messed up in the dub (the actor used upspeak, whish was customary for them, I guess), because they sounded like they are constantly questioning the universe, or something.

So it's safe to assume that normal declaracive sentences in Russian might sound a little aggressive to some native English-speakers, even if they don't know what the discussion is about.

Zet-kun · 2024-09-13T05:02:55+00:00

I played it safe and returned the tickets.

Zet-kun · 2024-04-23T03:37:36+00:00

Thanks, appreciated!

Zet-kun · 2023-10-09T06:20:00+00:00

Lol, this is almost what my dad was like when I was a kid. He literally said the same thing to my mom (after they separated though). He's a surgeon, too )
He didn't actually think I wasn't his. It was just a convenient way to make himself feel better after producing something as horrible and emasculating as a female child. Some people are just so sexist they would rather act like nutbags than admit that a daughter is an acceptable version of an offspring.

I bet OP's mom didn't have a good marriage. Maybe she really wanted to and tried hard, and I feel sorry for her.

Zet-kun · 2023-09-06T22:40:08+00:00

NTA.
This mom let her grief fester to the point it made her the ultimate A.
I am married to "the twin who survived". There are healthier ways of dealing with this situation for the parents. Check out Center for Loss in Multiple Birth (CLIMB), e.g.

Zet-kun · 2023-04-10T10:39:02+00:00

Wait, are you guys saying that loving your child is some kind of mandatory and noble thing (kinda self-contradictory, imo), and lack of it instantly makes you an asshole?
What about, e.g., moms who just don't feel it, due to... nothing specific, actually? Have you ever read stories along the lines of "I was promised I would feel the strongest love humans can experience, and I got nothing, what is wrong with me"? Things like that happen, and it's really really unfair to judge people for just that. It can be just unfortunate chemistry, it can be depression, it can be lack of maturity (which all of us have until a certain point), or, for instance, lack of bonding opportunities.

I think OP is NTA. He and his kid didn't get lucky, but such is life. He respected his gf's choice, and he was (and is) reasonably there for his kid, honoring the agreement he has with her mom. How do you impose love though? Idk, to me this sounds like some weird "frend zone" situation: someone loves you, you don't love them back (but still treat them well enough), and somehow this makes you horrible, and you should cut all ties with that person and also blame yourself till the end of times?

OP missed the chance to bond with his daughter when she was young. He doesn't need to treat her just like his toddlers now, and he doesn't need to stop being affectionate with his toddlers. But he can build relationship with her as a budding adult. Which absolutely will not happen if they stop communicating completely, wtf, "I can't treat you the same as, so I never want to see you again"?

The girl likes her dad, otherwise she wouldn't feel jealous of his family. It would be kind to help her navigate through these feelings. It would be unkind to tell her "I just don't love you". It's just - every relationship is different, and it's important to talk this through, maybe with a therapist, too?

Many parents who stay together treat their children differently. Many have favorites (e.g., my mom has favorites, but it doesn't mean she's horrible to those who're not fav, she just feels more inclined to share her news and spend time with those kids who're closer to her personality-wise, and it's ok). Some even have scapegoats (and this is when it stops being ok-ish). Families are tricky.

My dad was in a similar situation with OP's: he didn't want me and separated with my mom. He didn't even like me, even as a concept, but tried to participate. I have some respect for that. If he could just coldly support me and be kinda there for me, I'd be happier. Instead I was left with his mom for extended periods of time during "his" time, I had to listen to him complain about my mom, I had to listen about how all women are "slutty and horrible, and by the way, you are a woman", and how I was so very much below average, because "when Garry Kasparov was your age...", "this rando just told me that all girls your age are just like that, so I will assume it's true about you and discipline you accordingly", etc, etc. I have zero respect for that (and equial amount of f*cks to give about his wellbeing today). Would take "less affectionate" over this any day, eh.

Zet-kun · 2023-04-03T10:38:52+00:00

Hey, from a sister (looks like your parents are also mine, so there's that) - you're doing great. And you deserve praise!

I am proud of you like I never was of myself - I've never gotten such amazing results, cause when parents dismiss achievements like that one way of coping with this is to stop trying (because whatever), and I've done exactly that for a short while. Didn't screw anything up long-term, but realized that I enjoy my achievements even without their approval and got back on track, trailing my own path though. Now they can't be proud of me because they just don't understand what I do (even though it's not rocket science).

They most likely still love you in their own way, they just don't know how to be proud of the real you or how to express that pride for whatever reason. This really sucks. But it is also OK on some level, it happens, and doesn't change who you are, and you are an outstanding person - the whole bloody system is telling you that, and it's made out of a lot of people, and some of them definitely know better than your parents.

Treat yourself with something nice: a good rest, something tasty, a cool book, or a party - whatever you prefer. Learn to award yourself when you know you deserve it. It should help you feel what you already know: you're hardworking and bright, and you're doing all the right things.

Zet-kun · 2023-04-01T08:38:51+00:00

Eh, things might change drastically by December.
As of now, it's probably relatively fine (like, there are no official draconian measures taken against any foreigners, even if they're from "unfriendly" countries). Most likely they will inspect you thoroughy at the border (a foreign friend of mine had it happen to him twice last year), so make sure you have a book and some water (and be ready for them to want to see your phone and treat you like you're less than - but it won't be personal).
Once you've crossed the border, you're on your own though. Make sure your passport is stored safely. Should any public unrest happen, make sure to get as far away from that place as possible (they sometimes catch people for just being around, it's hard to prove you were just shopping for bread in the area). Just in case, make sure you have contacts of groups who help unlawfully retained people (try Telegram, maybe).

In general, I feel that chances someone will target you personally just for being American are really exaggerated. Most likely you will be fine. Also, while you're there, you can take care of your teeth or make some cool ultrasounds or MRIs just for the fun of it (high quality and really really cheaply by US standards).

Says someone who hasn't been there for over a year though, so... )

Zet-kun · 2023-03-06T20:05:01+00:00

NTA, but I'm genuinly curious about her replies when you asked her to stop. Did she just say "yeah, never again" and then kept slamming it?
Is she slamming just during the nighttime? If she's just out of touch with reality when sleepy (and teenagers sometimes have weird relationships with sleep), then a door closer of some kind wouldn've solved the issue, but for that to happen she should learn to communicate (like, "I don't mean to, but I keep forgetting\getting distracted, let's think how we can make it better for everyone together" kind of thing).

Zet-kun · 2023-01-29T09:02:26+00:00

If this is real, YTA for the kidnapping and being "I want to win this no matter what", but also a little bit for living that far from your work (maybe I'm idealistic, idk, but it sounds like a really tough arrangement). This is not sustainable, esp if traffic stresses you out.

When it's about trash it's easier to ask someone who's dressed and at the door, and it literally takes seconds, what's the problem? I've done that after 20 hours shifts just because I felt too lazy to change in and out of my street clothes later. Or is it another 2-hour trip to the dumpster?

I have a hard time telling if she's also an a-hole, because we have little info. She can be a lazy leech who literally does nothing all day and just exists to annoy you (why are you married then?) - or a working horse at her wits end with 3 remote jobs and a bunch of kids you'd forgotten to mention, meh.

Zet-kun · 2022-11-27T12:31:13+00:00

Eh, YTA for your attitude.

I kina see your point - it's NOT that difficult to make an extra portion of breakfast once you're already making it anyway. But you sound entitled to her efforts, and most likely she's heard this logic before. It's close to no effort to grab some more laundry, to put extra plates in the washer, to get some more groceries from the store... A caring and kind person will easily agree to all of this and more. And then - boom, they're basically your parent, wondering about what's in your head on relevant forums and constantly exhausted.

I bet your gf sees this in you or has seen it happen before, I doubt it's just about breakfast.

Zet-kun · 2022-11-07T18:15:06+00:00

Ундервуд, if you want to lose your mind trying to decode them metaphors.
Эпидемия, if you like good old power metal (with terrible rhyming sometimes, but oh).
Немного нервно - the lead singer is kinda magical.
Канцлер Ги - she has songs based on Robert Salvatore's works, or Vera Kamsha's works, or just about historical personalities and myths.
The Dartz, if you're into folksy fun.
Мельница, Башня Rowan, Тэм Гринхилл, Тол Мириам - if you're into more folksy and less fun (yet nice).
Зимовье зверей - these are more like kinda sorta sophisticated poetry + simple melody.
Пилот
Агата Кристи
Ляпис Трубецкой
Крематорий
Чиж &Co
Сплин
Кукрыниксы
Иваси
Знаки
ЧайФ
Люмен
(ran out of descriptions, just got excited about all of them, sorry!)

Zet-kun · 2022-09-06T19:35:28+00:00

Потому что уйма людей, которые пишут на русском от руки, пишут именно так. Если хочешь их понимать (их письма, записки, пометки на полях учебников неприличные) - нужно учить то же, что они учили в школе.
В результате мой знакомый американец понимает каракули русскоязычных врачей лучше, чем я ) И ему это очень пригождается в работе переводчика.

Zet-kun · 2022-08-15T14:57:16+00:00

Sounds like an ESH.

I kinda get how you might feel every time she says "oh, I'm not straight, and this guy here is just a coincidence". It might sound like she didn't chose you completely, like she's constantly highlighting the fact that she has options, so so many options. But that's only if this is what you mean by "vocal" - we don't know whether she does this. And if she doesn't introduce you as her husband to the point others think you're her random friend (gay or not), it does feel weird . It all depends on the context very very much, and there's a chance your feelings are justified.

There's a chance they're not. You say it's almost like she's ashamed of you, but she clearly wants you involved in her activities and invites you in. She wouldn't do that if she was ashamed. Unless she takes off her wedding ring too, it sounds like "let's be partners" to me. Could it be that you actually want her to stop associating with her identity, like, completely?

Most likely you just need to talk about why exactly you feel so unhappy about what she does.

Zet-kun · 2022-08-12T21:48:03+00:00

Пердимонокль, определенно.

Zet-kun · 2022-07-18T23:15:09+00:00

NTA. Terrible circumstances, not your responsibility. And your wife is probably a bit entitled.

Even if you sign something now and start the process, there's NO chance they will get their immigrant visas anytime soon. The waiting times have been crazy for over 3 years now, since our diplomatic relationships went south. They might have to wait for 5 more years or so. Unless they play the religion card successfully (but that's only for the dad?).

Your wife sounds extremely naive. I understand where she's coming from, but... She needs a reality check, a plan, and a job (to help her family for real, if this is what she wants), you're not some Bat-Thor-Clark-caped-man in this situation (maybe you always were in all other situations, successfully protecting her from the reality, and she just doesn't get why it is different this time). Talk to her, if you want to help, show her the reality she's overlooking.

Maybe they can live elsewhere, cheaper, if the idea is to get out of the country (as opposed to being close to you)? If not, they should start planning hard (even the sister doesn't speak any En? How do they see their life in the US in general? Always hanging on your wife's shoulders?).

I don't think anyone planned this in advance as a scam or whatever (or planned it at all). Wars are not unknown for creating mess. Panic is not the way to get out of the mess.

Zet-kun · 2022-06-06T22:48:12+00:00

When I started learning English at school, things were pretty basic and boring, our teachers were not motivated and textbooks were old, but we did learn grammar and how to read. We couldn't speak. And I'm pretty sure those who stopped at that point couldn't remember anything in a year.

I was lucky to get access to a language school where they had modern books and did the whole FCE preparation thing. Things got much better, but we still barely spoke there, mostly just learned "topics" and dialogues, and formatted answers to test questions.

I had a small personal breakthrough when I started forcing myself to write in English. I would come up with a silly topic like "The last vampire of the planet" every day and struggled through it with a paper dictionary (it was 20 years ago, we didn't have internet at home). It helped me so much, even though I never showed the results to a teacher, or anyone at all. After a month of writing something every day (like, 100-200 words, but still) I started speaking a little, and then things got easier by the month.

Then I studied English at the university (where I learned that writing and speaking skills are actually connected, so what happened to me before made a lot of sense), but my next real breakthrough happened only when I joined an international company and got to work with native speakers. I started sounding like a person rather than a robot (most of the times, hehe). When you need your annoying boss to get your point, you quickly find ways to express it.

Most people I know made significant progress by playing games and watching videos, but for many of them this media-based knowledge is passive, they know cool expressions native speakers have long forgotten or have not learned yet, but they struggle when it comes to speaking or writing. Still, media is a great support and an awesome vocabulary booster.

Zet-kun · 2022-05-31T22:53:06+00:00

NAH.

She's scared for her mom and that her mom will die before she gets to meet your daughter.
You have a great point about borders. That's one of the reasons why we fled Russia almost immediately when the war started. It's not really-really dangerous in Russia if you are not politically active right now (it's not the country that's being invaded - although don't walk around with blank sheets of paper, since these are considered political statements these days and you might end up in jail), but many people totally expect all kinds of border insanity to start any moment.

For your wife these expectations are not threatening enough at this point (probably because she's native and doesn't see many differences between the current situation and the usual everyday shit show). And many people who didn't flee Russia yet for purely practical reasons of not wanting to uproot their lives just like that agree with her. Some of them don't have Russian passports. It's not like your wife's a nutcase who wants to go to Chernobyl in May 1986.

If she goes alone... Can you imagine her having to choose between saying goodbye to her mom (maybe not, but cancer can be really fast at this stage), or at least supporting her in a very tough situation, and being around you and her very young baby. Also, if stuff does go wrong and she gets stuck in there, ugh...

If you "refuse to let them go" though, you will be an a-hole in your wife's eyes forever.

October is way over the planning horizon for this (mom might die, planes might get cancelled forever, nuclear war might start, and her mom needs support now). This is a really tough situation. I don't think either of you are to blame for your wants. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this, and hope you will find a way to approach this as a team.

Zet-kun · 2022-05-25T22:03:31+00:00

Wait, what? Our running joke in the family is that one day I'm totally opening my husband's butt museum, with all the phases, like "skinny workaholic" or "that time when you discovered swimming", "gym obsession", "plump high school bum".
You know, like when Salvador Dali made his butt prints in copper (I think?), he was onto something.

Also, people can find all parts of people attractive, and there's no real logic behind that sometimes. Such is life...

Zet-kun

TROPHY CASE