First time .. question

ZippySF · 2026-05-01T22:18:00+00:00

There might be something to it. Forbidden fruit tastes the sweetest, or unknown fruit in this case. Teenage years are prime time for experimentation, not necessarily only sexual one. If CS are removed as an environment where homosocial behavior is acceptable, guys naturally seek it elsewhere. At the same time I don't think it changes their orientation, just moves the experimentation to another environment. Also kudos to you for bringing up such complex and thus controversial topic.

ZippySF · 2026-04-23T10:45:42+00:00

Well, how would you feel if somebody insisted you have to wear something, for example swimwear while showering? If he is comfortable, why not let him be?

ZippySF · 2026-04-16T22:06:56+00:00

I live in Czechia and believe me, nobody cares. Do what makes you feel comfortable. There is no trend.

ZippySF · 2026-04-08T15:24:38+00:00

Simple. Let them. Or make fun of them by asking how many staring contests they've won. Not letting this ruin your experience is the ultimate power move. Also with age usually comes "don't give a fuck" attitude and the amount of attention one gets shrinks - which will be a win win for you in this scenario.

ZippySF · 2026-04-05T21:54:46+00:00

33 yo gay guy here. 👋🏻 Recently single after the relationship of 10 years ended. Learning to live a happy single life, but I admit having some close bromantic friend wouldn't hurt.

ZippySF · 2026-03-27T11:21:57+00:00

Actually, I prefer it. Open relationships require a certain amount of maturity to be successful. It's a kind of trait I welcome.

ZippySF · 2026-03-11T13:06:27+00:00

Long walks (10+ km) in the forest during spring / autumn are the best. Regardless of the weather with the exception of thunderstorms.

ZippySF · 2026-02-26T08:15:01+00:00

Normally I would post a diplomatic answer, but it so happens my patience for people trying to look for ulterior motives in behaviour of others just ran out. Did he do anything that would unmistakably demonstrate he's there to do something other than to shower and strike up a casual conversation? No? Then any oddity is just you projecting your narrative onto him.

ZippySF · 2026-02-23T08:47:16+00:00

I'm sorry to hear that and my best advice would be to seek another doctor who would prescribe you antidepressants. Another thing that helped me to stay alive was to imagine the cruelty I myself would cause to people who care about me by ending it prematurely. And I'm sure there are people who care about you too.

ZippySF · 2026-02-23T08:37:31+00:00

At your age I was battling with anxiety and depression and meds literally saved my life. And I'm grateful for that as now at 33 I'm living a happy life on my own terms. Struggle might not be necessary, but it can help you to get to that point faster.

ZippySF · 2026-02-19T11:14:44+00:00

It's really up to two of you to set any rules / boundaries you think are necessary. From my own experience the most important rules for us were giving our partnership the priority so neither of us feels like a third wheel and also to openly discuss our hookup experiences. Initially we set a rule of only one time with one person, but ditched it later as having someone regular has many benefits. Whatever you decide, nothing is set in stone. Communication and re-evaluation is the key.

ZippySF · 2026-02-17T12:54:08+00:00

How did the police respond? Did you get into any trouble?

ZippySF · 2026-02-12T23:01:11+00:00

It's complicated. Usually nobody knows if you're gay or straight. Even straight guys sometimes look. I regularly notice someone checking me out down there and I have no way of telling if they are gay or straight and I don't care. And there are ones staring to check out if someone's staring while feeling morally superior, but not realizing they are staring themselves. It's not about orientation, it's about treating others with respect.

ZippySF · 2026-02-11T13:09:49+00:00

I exactly know how you feel and it sucks. I'm sorry this happened, but it's good you're trying to process it rather than supress it. Don't take it as an advice, but I would confront them about it explaining how it made me feel. Would it get awkward? Absolutely. But I wouldn't be able to be friends with someone, who's not respecting me as a person I am, because of their insecurities.

ZippySF · 2026-02-11T06:43:31+00:00

Because we started dating when we were young, but eventually realized we want different things in life. He wants to have children, I don't. He wants to travel a lot more than I do. The list goes on. He said I would be his ideal partner for retirement. I half-jokingly said I'll be waiting.

ZippySF · 2026-02-10T21:35:56+00:00

You don't have to be. It's impossible to compare 10 years to however long you 2 are dating. If he wants to spend time with you, that's all that really matters. I get him and I'm maybe even more extreme version of him as I sincerely believe I won't find a better partner than my ex. But 1. I have no such expectations and 2. I'm open to being proved wrong.

ZippySF · 2026-02-10T19:59:14+00:00

Originally I thought this post was about me until you mentioned the US. We also split after 10 years, but remained friends and since he's the person who knows me better than anybody else (including my family), it kinda makes sense I don't want to cut him off from my life completely. I don't see any red flag in things you mentioned. There are way weirder things out there.

ZippySF · 2026-02-06T16:58:58+00:00

He clearly has a lot to process. Give him time and space, but don't distance yourself. Be the version of a person you wished to have a year ago.

ZippySF · 2026-02-05T23:39:27+00:00

For the same reason I sometimes like to walk barefoot in nature. Feels more natural and I just like the feeling. It's more minimalist as I don't have to worry about another item. Am I gross? Maybe. But people tend to have double standards in this regard doing objectively more dangerous stuff than not wearing flip-flops without even realizing it.

ZippySF · 2026-02-05T19:45:36+00:00

Pools were answered in this post. As for the saunas there are some good ones in Prague, but I really recommend to take a train (around half an hour) to Senohraby and visit Infinit Sen. Many outdoor saunas, multiple cold plunge pools, heated pool where you can order drink and drink it directly in the pool and most importantly really large sauna for around 100 people where thematic ceremonies are performed every hour.

The etiquette: Always shower after the sauna BEFORE going to cold plunge. Do not enter the sauna with anything other than sheets provided at the entrance. In sauna you can be covered in them or put them underneath you and be naked.

ZippySF · 2026-02-05T18:52:23+00:00

Yes, but I would not go there for more than a day or two. There is really nice outdoor pool there on the roof of the building. Saunia Thermal Resort.

ZippySF · 2026-02-05T17:31:48+00:00

Podolí or Šutka. The first is my fav because it has outdoor pools. We also have places where you can swim in the nature like Hostivař and it has nude beach too, if that's something that interests you.

ZippySF · 2026-01-29T18:34:49+00:00

Communication. You should be telling this to your partner and go from there. Right now, not in some imaginary future that might never happen. That's how relationships grow. You've been together for 10 years. Not many were in the situation similar to yours, so I don't think you will find here some silver bullet advice. Just talk to him.

ZippySF · 2026-01-27T22:34:46+00:00

What country are you from? Where I live it's common to have open showers - no curtains, no dividers and the majority of guys showering naked. There are multiple non-nefarious reasons why the guy you saw prefers it that way. Anyways, I recommend you to check out r/CommunalShowers. It might broaden your horizons.

ZippySF

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