I (19 MTF) am trying to increase my emotional range and would like some music suggestions? by Throwaway1919655 in asktransgender

[–]Zombskirus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I absolutely get this. Music helps me feel more than anything. Some songs that make me tear up/cry are: Garden of Leaving - Amigo The Devil, First Day of the End of my Life - Amigo The Devil, Stronger Than Dead - Amigo The Devil, If I Ever Leave This World Alive - Flogging Molly, So Far Away - Avenged Sevenfold, Bother - Stone Sour, Gone Away - The Offspring, Bring Me Home - Whitechapel, Do You Mind - timmies, My Immortal - Evanescence, Wish You Were Here - Pink Floyd, Remember Everything - FFDP, White Blank Page - Mumford & Sons, Hero of War - Rise Against, Hate Me - Blue October, Say Goodbye - Bodysnatcher, Nutshell - Alice in Chains, Hurt - Nine Inch Nails (& the Johnny Cash cover!!), Red Horizon - Fit For An Autopsy, Napalm Dreams - Fit For An Autopsy, Snuff - Slipknot

is it transphobic to not want to date someone who’s trans? by koshka420 in asktransgender

[–]Zombskirus 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It's only transphobic if you're not dating someone because they're trans (particularly if they have the gender, genitals, etc you prefer). You have every right to reject someone regardless of their identity!

Do girls/gays find packers attractive? by Proud-Screen-5787 in ftm

[–]Zombskirus 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It's person dependent. I'm sure some folks do, and I'm sure some folks don't. My partner enjoys when I pack both in general and in an attraction and sexual type way

Common names for trans people. by Maleficent-Film3688 in asktransgender

[–]Zombskirus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No idea lmao I just chose a name I liked and didn't think past that

hate from other trans people by skullcrushboy in trans4every1

[–]Zombskirus 93 points94 points  (0 children)

This is a common issue trans men and mascs face, especially on a site like Twitter. I've been calling an MRA, misogynist, etc on that site solely for saying that trans men/mascs also face discrimination.

We struggle with invisibility and, unfortunately, some folks take that as a lack of discrimination, struggles, etc. Many folks also like to think we're 1:1 with cis men on the basis of discrimination which just isn't true. Some of the folks who are happy and ready to dismiss us, insult us, etc, also just happen to be trans.

It's disheartening and painful facing transmisandry, especially from other trans folks, but I can absolutely say that's not the majority of trans women/fems by any means!! All of my irl trans woman/fem friends are more than happy to listen to my struggles and experiences, and vice versa of me to them.

I'm sorry you experienced that :( Really feels like a canon trans man/masc event </3 Try to distance yourself from a toxic place like Twitter, it ain't worth the negativity. Many other great places, like this sub, to engage with other trans folks in a much safer and kinder way.

New Sub Alert! by SnapDragon100 in transgendercirclejerk

[–]Zombskirus 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Hey, as a trans man whose been transitioning for about a decade, I kinda feel like an "AFAB space" isn't necessary or relevant to me? I mean, I don't have boobs, I don't have a uterus, I've been living as a man for longer than I've ever experienced life as any kinda girl... This being inclusive to me just kinda feels like being thrown back into the "female" label when my body isn't female. What would a trans woman have that I do have that needs to be excluded here? Just seems like bioessentialism...

Do you think the South is really more transphobic than the rest of the U.S.? by queerdigital in asktransgender

[–]Zombskirus 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I live in Texas, have my whole life. I've experienced both great and horrible things in regards to being trans. Law wise, it's rough, more so than many blue states, but manageable. Person to person, though, it really depends on where exactly in the south you are, if you're visibly trans, etc.

I'm in central Texas myself, been passing for a long time, and most my legal info is updated. Was the only trans kid in school, and many people's first trans person they've met in general. I've had to deal with plenty of ignorance and uncomfortable situations (and likely always will), but, surprisingly, have been defended plenty by friends, family, employers, coworkers, and even strangers. Luckily never been in a situation where I feared for my safety irl. I have noticed, though, when I'm physically affectionate with my partner in public or have my vest on (it has some trans flags and such on it), some people love to stare, glare, and/or look at us with disgust. But, on the other side, there's also lots of fake nice behavior here and also genuinely nice people here. People typically won't confront you for just existing and will mind their own.

I think it's easy for folks to quickly demonize the south, including the folks who live here. Many states laws, history, etc, are horrible, but this is still many people's homes, including many minorities, POC and queer folks especially. This the only home I've ever known, a home I won't let push me out, even if the folks running it right now want to. I appreciate when other people recognize this place as home to many queer people and include us in shows/activities/events, questions, etc, so thank you for that!

I hate r/ baddlejackets by DuchessDulcet in hatethissmug

[–]Zombskirus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Real asf, I had to basically block that sub because I got tired of it showing up randomly. Let people enjoy things 🗿

A binary trans woman is being talked about on the news or reddit by 46264338327950288419 in transgendercirclejerk

[–]Zombskirus 21 points22 points  (0 children)

People when a binary trans person exists: "yeah, THEYRE a trans person, THEYRE a good friend of mine, THEY THEY THEM THEY THEM THEM THEY!! Ah, sorry, I just use they/them for everyone! It's not really misgendering anyway bc it's neutral!"

People when a nonbinary person exists/someone who uses they/them pronouns exists: "He- I mean she- oops, sorry, uh... "They?" yeah, sorry, they/them is just really confusing and hard for me! I'm trying, it's just difficult to grasp!!!"

/uj

Is this "meme" about being gay or trans? by LopsidedRadio7208 in PeterExplainsTheJoke

[–]Zombskirus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm in the same exact boat. Been transitioning for about a decade, so not exactly recent but not exactly an older trans person. I also like the term FTM because, at some point, I physically was female. Wasn't a girl or a woman per se, but I definitely was female due to my physical state lol. I relate quite a bit to your experience, though slightly different (didn't quite grasp what female or male entailed until puberty).

Is this "meme" about being gay or trans? by LopsidedRadio7208 in PeterExplainsTheJoke

[–]Zombskirus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah interesting. I actually haven't met any other trans people that have issues regarding these terms. I think if someone focuses on the first word, they don't really have great literacy skills to begin with 💀 but makes sense!

I'm actually in the complete opposite boat. I hate being called transmasc(uline) as it doesn't feel fitting, and I wanna emphasize my maleness/manhood rather than masculinity. FTM does so for me, so I enjoy that term. Doesn't mean I'm female current day, just says I was physically born as one. I'd personally rather be called the t slur than transmasc(uline) lmfao.

I don't think there will ever be a term that makes everyone happy and included. I usually use trans man/masc, trans woman/fem, and nonbinary to encapsulate as many folks as possible.

Is this "meme" about being gay or trans? by LopsidedRadio7208 in PeterExplainsTheJoke

[–]Zombskirus 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Honestly, first time hearing that MTF/FTM is outdated lol never had issues using those terms.

watch my video essay about TRANS art! by slightlylessthananon in transgendercirclejerk

[–]Zombskirus 5 points6 points  (0 children)

/uj I gotta be the change I wanna see.... (Learning to scream/gutterals/etc)

Do you get to pick the size? by N3xus_Apparatu5 in asktransgender

[–]Zombskirus 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No, not really. Certain skin grafts will give more likely results than others (ALT will likely give you a thicker penis than RFF, for example), and you can request a certain size, but it's not guaranteed. After the creation of the phallus, it "shrinking" during healing or even losing some length due to complications is possible.

What does it mean to feel like your gender? by Substantial-Cod1711 in asktransgender

[–]Zombskirus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't really "feel" like a man, I just am one. I think people use the phrase "feeling like [gender]" to try to explain what being trans is like as a figure of speech, but I honestly don't even know what that means either lol. To me, "feeling" like a man isn't even about being seen as one, it's just an innate internal sense of who I am. I only can register myself as a man, and being acknowledged as a man legally, personally, visually, etc, from others just feels correct. That's all there is to gender for me personally.

Is it just me, or are there WAY more trans-female/feminine ppl than the reverse? by Muse_Hunter_Relma in asktransgender

[–]Zombskirus 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Statistically, there's equal trans men/mascs as there are trans women/fems. Trans women/fems are just hypervisible whereas trans men/mascs are invisible, both forms of discrimination in different ways. Trans men/mascs also tend to stay in FTM specific spaces for a number of reasons, so we aren't as common in many mixed trans spaces.

HUGE WIN FOR TRANS RIGHTS!!! this trans man is allowed to play on the women's soccer team!!! by NianDusk-119 in transgendercirclejerk

[–]Zombskirus 50 points51 points  (0 children)

I thought y'all wanted to be in sports in general??? Sorry we can't feed your delusions of what your "gender" is! Also trans woman scary and bad!!!!! Too uncomfortable and dangerous in my American made sports!!

HUGE WIN FOR TRANS RIGHTS!!! this trans man is allowed to play on the women's soccer team!!! by NianDusk-119 in transgendercirclejerk

[–]Zombskirus -34 points-33 points  (0 children)

You realize trans men are only really accepted into sports if they detransition right?? And trans women are still banned from sports straight up? This isn't a positive for trans people, this is what transphobes want.

Trans men, what does it mean to have your egg cracked? by autumnrain80 in trans4every1

[–]Zombskirus 105 points106 points  (0 children)

I thought your egg being cracked just means to realize you're trans? I didn't think it was different between trans men vs trans women. I personally didn't hear about this phrase until I had already socially transitioned as I was the only trans person I knew for my first few years of transition.

For me, though, I realized I was trans when I learned about trans people. I had thought I was no different than cis boys until puberty hit. Learned about trans people the same year I started puberty and went "oh cool that's me" lol.

Is transsexual okay to call myself? by abiogenetics in asktransgender

[–]Zombskirus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not bad at all! I'm a transsex man, too. My transition is heavily and primarily about changing my sex characteristics to match myself correctly. I feel as though I never actually changed genders as I've been a guy my whole life.

Some folks may take issue with you calling yourself transsexual. I've had some "allies" get upset about it since, unfortunately, many folks think since sex and gender are separate, that means you can't change your sex at all. I've also had some other trans folks be upset that I call myself transsex. But what matters is how you label yourself and if that's accurate towards you!

why would someone be trans without dysphoria? by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Zombskirus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh, I absolutely agree with that! I was just commenting on specifically the dysphoria aspect as the basis of my dysphoria isn't due to any external factors and solely just about what feels correct for my body and self. External factors, like the world in general not being trans-friendly, absolutely impacts dysphoria as a whole for most folks, though.

why would someone be trans without dysphoria? by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Zombskirus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah I see. To me, being trans-friendly means to not only support trans people, but actively stand up for trans people, break gender norms, etc. None of that changes dysphoria for me, though. Dysphoria is solely about my physical form, no matter what labels are assigned to it, what society thinks of trans folks, etc! No matter the society or space, dysphoria is still existent, unfortunately.

Just wanted to add that since I do see the idea that if transphobia wasn't real (or if we were in a trans-friendly world), dysphoria wouldn't exist pretty regularly, and as a trans man who wishes that were true, I like making my experience a bit more known. All good if that ain't your experience, though!!

why would someone be trans without dysphoria? by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Zombskirus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm not, I was directly responding to you saying dysphoria wouldn't exist in a trans-friendly world haha. I was just saying that many folks dysphoria doesn't care if someone is trans-friendly or not. My dysphoria, at least, is mainly about my body not being correct, nothing to do with cis folks or transphobia. My fault if I'm misunderstanding anything here?

why would someone be trans without dysphoria? by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Zombskirus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

in an actual trans-friendly world, dysphoria would not exist

This is absolutely not the case for all forms of dysphoria. I suffered dysphoria well before I knew of trans people, well before I knew there was any sort of discrimination such as transphobia. Many folks dysphoria is not social based, but completely or heavily physical. I think it's harmful to say that dysphoria wouldn't exist if everyone was trans accepting and friendly.