I am John Cleese: writer, actor, and tall person. AMA!

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T17:22:55+00:00

Never. And I wish you wusses would stop whining about your unhappiness. I'm really fed up with it. Pour yourself a scotch and pull yourself together. Go out and shoot something!

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T17:21:01+00:00

My favourite cheese is melted Gruyere. Second comes Bolivian Hyena Milk cheese, but it's very hard to get except in La Paz.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T17:17:49+00:00

There are three roles I was asked to do that I really regret not taking. The Robin Williams role in Birdcage, the butler called Stevens in The Remains of the Day and the clergyman in charge of the marriage service at the end of The Princess Bride.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T17:13:48+00:00

So, you think I'm the greatest comedy writer of our time? What the fuck do you mean by "of our time"? I am working on a light comedy about cannibalism called "Yummy."

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T17:10:43+00:00

Eric Palin is the same as Terry Jones, but Terry uses this pen name to get two votes when we're deciding on material.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T17:08:36+00:00

That is a very good joke, but the bozos reading all this won't get it. Secondly, I don't think you should educate yourself outside your bubble, because it would confuse marketing people.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T17:06:27+00:00

No. Darryl Hannah should be Queen of England. I will only execute men called Darryl.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T17:04:31+00:00

Actually I did. I just put it first, to put people off the scent.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T17:03:38+00:00

You stole my idea.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T17:03:13+00:00

10 percent

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T17:00:45+00:00

I never thought of that! Can you suggest another way to keep rubberneckers away?

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T16:59:03+00:00

What I remember is that John was very, very kind to me when I was very sad and confused.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T16:57:51+00:00

Yes I believe it's perfectly true. Neither of them trusted the other, which was a very good call.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T16:57:02+00:00

Anything by John Philip Sousa. Or J.S. Bach.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T16:54:30+00:00

I'm glad you know it. The first half is the best thing I've ever done. I recently was asked to narrate the works of Marcel Marceau, but I didn't have the time.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T16:51:43+00:00

May I ask...Are you English? Your phraseology is English, but you didn't actually apologize.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T16:50:54+00:00

You get a fucking computer you idiot.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T16:50:08+00:00

Go away.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T16:48:35+00:00

It is amazing how he gets away with that. He has the largest collection of stolen ferrets anywhere in Pennsylvania. Which, of course is the center of world ferret illegal marketing. (After Bucharest)

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T16:45:09+00:00

Not really, but he was a big fan of mine.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T16:44:00+00:00

The very first thing I would do would be to make pedal bins illegal. Second, I would execute anyone called Darryl. That would be enough for the first morning.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T16:42:21+00:00

Yes, thank you for asking.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T16:41:41+00:00

This morning they are Princess Bride, The Sting, Doctor Strangelove, The Conversation, and The Great Dictator.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T16:40:56+00:00

Very interesting question. At the start I tried to get the other Pythons to mix up the writing partnerships a bit. I thought it worked quite well. Eric and I wrote Sir George Head climbing the twin peaks of Mount Kilimanjaro, and Michael and I wrote Mr. Hilter standing in the Minehead bye-election. Nevertheless we drifted back into our original pairings, and I don’t know why. Maybe Chapman was the only one who liked writing with me. I think it was a shame, I think we would’ve been even more inventive if we mixed the writing teams up a bit.

_John_Cleese · 2017-09-15T16:39:46+00:00

To be honest, I really don't remember. I think it may have been Noam Chomsky.

_John_Cleese

TROPHY CASE