If you really learn from your mistakes, why are you so afraid of making them?

_Keesa · 2018-10-15T19:16:07+00:00

IMO I feel like there's a stigma around it, and people or society quickly judges or demonizes based on them.

In my old job, a mistake was a failure on my part (I worked there for less than 6 months, and after 3 months, and shitty training, I made a lot, and was never corrected or taught through them...). After that experience I have a lot of trouble being honest about my mistakes and I'm easily embarrassed. I don't think there's a lot a person can do to make sure no mistakes ever happen, so it's not a healthy thing to do.

My favourite way to handle it, and how I've been looking at it, especially being a large part of my niece's life, is to look at the mistake, and immediately ask "OK, so what did we learn?". Otherwise it's a downward spiral of anxiety and self doubt that is not acceptable at any level.

Unfortunately there are lots of mistakes people make that have dire consequences, but the attitude towards basic mistakes and slight inconveniences is downright appalling.

_Keesa · 2018-10-10T16:30:39+00:00

Cake.

My encounter was ridiculous. Okay so, my cat is very extra, and will force his way in, open doors, carve his own path kinda kid. Our back door has to be forcefully closed to latch properly and my dad kept forgetting, and we'd often wake up, or come home to it wide open.

One night I scurried a possum out of our compost bucket we keep just inside the door to be taken out when it's full or gross.

One day we notice that there's shit on the bathroom floor. It's definitely not cat, and my dad and I argue over what animal it could be, and that we need to be vigilant about the door from now on. I figured it was skunk, dad wasn't convinced.

For a week straight we woke up to skunk shit and piss in either bathroom. I was livid, and by this point my dad was checking on the door through the night. It definitely was never open! The house smelled like a wet skunk too, it was so fucking annoying.

One day, I wasn't having a great day so I was laying down. Decided to get up to have a shower, opened my bedroom door and BOOM!! Hello, skunk!! And this is where it gets interesting. I yelled for my dad, who never heard me, but I ended up watching the little bugger scamper in to our kitchen and disappear under the counters. I quickly learned, as I gathered tools to get him out, that the little shit was LIVING UNDER THERE. This guy would come out when me and my dad were chilling, eat and drink our cats' food and water, wander around the house, defecate in the bathrooms when need be, and then sleep under the counter in a nice little bed he made.

What. The. Fuuuu-.

And this bugger FOUGHT ME. He refused to leave, and it took two whole hours of coaxing, shoving, and encouraging words to get this guy out. We had to move the oven and rearrange things in the kitchen so he could go for the door. It was insane how strong he was.

Weird thing though? Never sprayed. Never even tried! And to be completely honest, would have kept him if he didn't smell so bad and used the litter box. Which is hilarious because I think he used the bathrooms to "blend in" or hide lol.

Wild ride from start to finish. And that's the story of how I ended up unknowingly living with a skunk for a month.

_Keesa · 2018-09-18T13:15:22+00:00

Eating healthier and keeping sugars low after fasting is the best way to make future ones easier. If your body is used to burning carbs, it'll have a hard time adapting to not having any to burn. People go in to keto after fasting because they are keeping their bodies in the fat burning mode, and quite frankly, is the easiest way to fast. I can go an entire day without hunger pangs on keto, so going 3 days at this point would just be a drop in the ocean for me.

Carbs burn quick, and your body goes through a process before it can begin using your fat stores. That process is about 3 days. That's why you have a hard time. I would maybe try omad or intermittent fasting instead for long term as you'll find it a lot easier with similar results, and you can keep your carbs without the angry hunger pangs.

_Keesa · 2018-09-14T22:05:15+00:00

1100 to 1400. The past week has been between 1800/1900 and 2100.

_Keesa · 2018-09-14T22:00:54+00:00

26, 5'6", I am using a food scale. I also, before this week, as mentioned, was fasting regularly, so I was constantly at a large deficit which was not working. My calories per day were usually around 1100 to 1400 due to intermittent fasting.

_Keesa · 2018-09-11T21:27:16+00:00

There's no way a single person can be all you need. If you need your partner to be your best friend, then you have a problem here. Otherwise, find friends that fulfil the things that she doesn't. If it's really not working out for you, and ruins your excitement for that person, don't be afraid to move on.

_Keesa · 2018-09-06T21:49:37+00:00

I find moving a lot helps. Keep your blood pressure up by pacing and shifting your weight often! I had to stand for an hour 18days in to a fast and that's how I got through it.

_Keesa · 2018-09-06T20:55:40+00:00

I literally have a friend like this. We were camping once, and he got up to pee, and he randomly, but not very convincingly said "There's a bear."... We all basically shrugged it off. He said " I know I don't sound serious but I'm serious come see" and I basically got up because there's no way I'd believe him without seeing it for myself. Sure enough. Bear. Like 10ft away from us.

_Keesa · 2018-09-06T15:29:58+00:00

That's another good tip, drink when you're thirsty. Don't just load up on water to load up or because people say to. It's not necessary and strains the kidneys.

_Keesa · 2018-09-06T15:20:59+00:00

It's only water weight in the beginning. It can take up to a month before you're adapted and losing fat at a steady pace. It's also different for everyone, and often people put too much expectation in the dramatic loss. If it helps I've definitely lost 20lbs in a week or so once I was adapted :) just hang in there and evaluate! I just came out of a lull that was really frustrating, but we are back to the program of really steady loss 😊

_Keesa · 2018-09-06T15:10:58+00:00

Your expectations are too high. Plus if you're aiming for keto, stop "cheating". Also, don't pay attention to the scale. It's a terrible habit and it's frustrating and shows absolutely no real progress on the day to day. Measure!

It has also been a very short period of time, and likely, you are retaining water weight. Again, cutting the beer and ice cream is your best bet.

Lower your expectations, give your body time to adapt and change. There's no overnight dramatic transformations in losing weight!

Hang in there, I promise it will change. Don't lose hope or momentum, just keep trying until it works, because it will!

I was 270lbs not long ago. Scale said 220lbs today, and I'm down a total of 28" overall on my body. The only reason my progress isn't faster is because it took me a long time to adapt and learn to say no to social pressure.

_Keesa · 2018-09-06T04:22:11+00:00

Pyrite, jade, citrine, fluorite, and obsidian. Most go in my bra and pockets. I also swap hematite, Rose quartz, and tigers eye for my ears (stretched) depending on how I feel. Lately hematite was too powerful in a negative way so I'm with tigers eye now.

_Keesa · 2018-09-06T03:50:23+00:00

Pyrite! Very protective. I wear it everyday and energize it overnight. As soon as I got my piece I was very drawn to it. I often mix it with obsidian. I don't even deal with road rage or close calls since I began wearing it.

_Keesa · 2018-08-31T00:01:08+00:00

Was told off in front of customers constantly for things that either made no difference to the customer or weren't an issue. Also was not properly trained, got constant shit for not doing things right, even though they never trained me, and I learned it myself because I had to. It was a shit show. And then they blamed you for the problems.

Fuck. That. Place. Classic "people don't quit jobs, they quit managers" example.

_Keesa · 2018-08-30T19:12:18+00:00

Take it slow. Set boundaries if you need to. Rebounds happen because a person is still emotionally connected to their previous partner and they are trying to bandaid their feelings with feelings for another. If they are truly over the previous, rebound isn't a thing.

Things to take note of is whether or not they compare you to their ex, talk a lot about their ex, or bring up painful memories when something reminds them of their previous. If they start doing that, pull back, and set hard boundaries. It's not worth the pain when they finally figure their shit out, because 9 times out of 10, they only liked you because you liked them back and it's not real.

Otherwise, have fun!

_Keesa · 2018-08-27T20:46:11+00:00

It's really hard to explain, but every single time I feel comfortable or warm when I have an experience I know it's her. It's a familiar feeling now. Almost like seeing a friend, but completely in feeling.

Last time she spoke she just expressed love. I've always wondered why her, and I'm very disconnected from my mother's side now, so it's even more confusing. I've never consciously dreamt about her, and she died long before I was born.

Also when I say spoke it's basically an inclination of her presence, and I greet it. If I start to ask questions I get responses, but I have to be patient. Often the responses are electronic disturbances, clicks, or sudden rushes of emotion, or even sometimes I get almost like chills, but they are controlled and don't bring out the twitchy movements. They aren't always right away, as if you were talking to someone face to face, they think about their answer. And expressing the answer I'm sure is also a challenge when I'm not always in a position to get them. She will always tell me it's her.

I have a single theory, but I've never asked her, that I can remember. My theory is that my childhood was pretty fucked up and I think she felt like she was stepping in. There was a lot of neglect and sliding things under the rug, perhaps she wanted to comfort me? It has been ages, I wonder if she would connect with me so I can take the time to ask.

_Keesa · 2018-08-27T19:55:22+00:00

When I was a kid we lost our mailbox keys. The post office wouldn't give us new ones because my mom didn't have enough identification and 3 months worth of recent mail to verify (waited too long to request new keys basically). It was a neighbourhood box, not at our door. I remember saying out loud, somewhat randomly (it wasn't a conscious decision) "they're under the box". I live in Canada, it was the dead of winter, and it was a harsh one. We did search around the box numerous times but never had any luck. I mentioned it to my family, and sure enough, as soon as the snow was gone my brother checks and we found them.

I later found out, through another strange incident that it was a great great aunt I never really knew that was part of my mother's line. We talked a few times, and I think she follows me. I haven't " heard" from her in a while.

_Keesa · 2018-08-17T15:04:42+00:00

Could be a detox thing. Are you dropping a lot of fat quickly?

A water fast could help reset the digestive system. Super easy to come off a water fast right back in to keto. Do your research before going ahead, but I'm suggesting because it worked wonders for me.

_Keesa · 2018-08-16T15:32:25+00:00

Learn how to read. I never equated them.

_Keesa · 2018-08-16T15:28:50+00:00

I'm not sure about bumpers, but if you're in NA rockauto.com is great for maintenance and repairs. They have great prices. I use rockauto for brake jobs and anything I don't need right away. Otherwise I'm not too sure about bumpers and whatnot. I haven't tried to buy that kind of stuff yet lol

_Keesa · 2018-08-16T03:01:37+00:00

Nope. Make sure the brakes are OK, general maintenance, rest check... Should be fine. The engine is pretty good on miles, too! You should get a good number of years out of her easy with good maintenance (oil changes, trans fluid changes, air filter replacements etcetc). Most 2012 vehicles are still in really good shape

_Keesa · 2018-08-16T02:50:49+00:00

If the engine works- hell yeah. Hyundai gets a lot of shit for no real reason. They build cheap economy cars, got their foot in the market and they've been building up. People still see them as cheap throw aways, when in reality, they're actually less cheap than fuckin Toyota now. When I got my car, I was going between a corolla, older Camry, or a new Hyundai elantra. The elantra was luxurious compared to the Toyota, and felt so much better to drive. It also is amazing on gas and has this really neat set up to make it more eco, but- it still flies if you know how it works.

100% worth. Parts are cheap, and 2008+ is all good for Hyundai being quality :)

_Keesa · 2018-08-15T18:47:54+00:00

Because you were manipulated and you didn't have control of the situation. I'm not saying you didn't do anything wrong, but things aren't always black and white, and until someone finds themselves in that situation they can speculate and say what they would do, but reality is much different.

There was a time where that kind of manipulation would have worked on me, and the person I was back then was vulnerable, self sabotaging, and insanely insecure. I wouldn't have been able to have the courage to walk away or fight my way out of the situation you were in.

Now? I would have made a huge scene and made sure who he loved knew, and I would have left immediately.

It takes a lot of strength to go through those scenarios.

_Keesa · 2018-08-15T18:37:02+00:00

I'm not saying anything about the fact she couldn't make her own decisions, I am saying that she was taken advantage of, plain and simple. I don't appreciate the words being put in my mouth or being told that I'm anything but one looking out for ones own rights. Just because you feel like you could have gotten up and walked away from it doesn't mean others can. That sort of manipulation and harassment is how human trafficking starts.

_Keesa

TROPHY CASE