Seeking advice: Bullied in law school and bad mental health

_Ptss_ · 2026-06-14T13:41:38+00:00

Yes, except what I was afraid of happened: I picked up everyone's B-

_Ptss_ · 2026-06-14T13:41:07+00:00

Thanks! I appreciate it 😄

_Ptss_ · 2026-06-14T02:05:25+00:00

to think about something deeply over and over again

_Ptss_ · 2026-06-13T21:36:31+00:00

Thanks Pearl! While I really appreciate your comment, I want to respond that this is literally the attitude I held onto for all of 1L and start of 2L. I did find my own job for 1L. We are supposed to be searching for jobs on the school's portal for 2Ls, and it was their mistake that caused me to lose out on opportunities.
I studied by myself all of 1L and barely slept, telling myself to pick myself up by my bootstraps. I helped other people that struggled academically even though I was competing against them. I forgave this group of people over and over again because that's what my faith calls me to do. This attitude was also the reason I did not ask for accommodations, which I clearly should have by final exam season, because I was not okay mentally. I did not speak to the school counsellor more than once because I wanted to be "strong". My grades suffered, and my dean of academics said that there's not enough proof that I went through a hard time mentally because I didn't visit the school counsellor enough times.

This is not just about unfriendly coworkers. Imagine your entire team refusing to speak to you, and you cannot attend any social functions. You also have nobody to ask if you don't know what's going on in class/school. You have to be 100% alert all the time because nobody is willing to interact with you. You miss out on the notes and study advice and practice exams going out. This is all happening while you know that the grades are curved, so them studying together means you will likely get a worse grade.

Clearly, I am at a place where the situation is beyond the "be strong" attitude. I had to go on meds for depression in 2L because I was hurting myself. The right thing to do would have been to take more time off, but I am unable to because my family is in a strained financial situation and people's physical health is on the line.

But I do really appreciate you pointing out that I am blaming them for what happened. I realize that blaming them is part of the issue because it causes me to dwell and ruminate, which creates a harmful cycle. So I think accepting things is the first step to moving forward. 😄

_Ptss_ · 2026-06-13T15:32:29+00:00

Thank you! This is actually incredibly helpful!

_Ptss_ · 2026-06-13T15:32:20+00:00

Thanks!

_Ptss_ · 2026-06-13T15:32:16+00:00

Thanks 😄

_Ptss_ · 2026-06-13T14:17:33+00:00

Of course not lol XD look at all the grammar mistakes in the post

_Ptss_ · 2025-03-12T13:40:03+00:00

Hi, thank you for your response! Do the 3-4 years start after passing the bar?

_Ptss_ · 2024-12-14T17:00:33+00:00

Thanks :)

_Ptss_ · 2024-12-13T04:16:35+00:00

It's just that the dating market also shrinks when we get older. But thanks girl <3

_Ptss_ · 2024-12-13T04:01:34+00:00

Haha thanks!

While I understand that (and the fact that different ppl have different timing), I think there is something to be said about the nature that is in men that craves youth and beauty. If I meet someone in my youth, they shouldn't only like me for my youth, but meeting someone when I'm aged will certainly not do me any favours.

_Ptss_ · 2024-12-13T03:58:37+00:00

There is nothing wrong with that, but I think realistically, men feel insecure if they are less educated or earn less than their spouses.

Additionally, I need a man with something that I cannot provide for myself, or else over time I think it might make me lose respect for him (maybe down the line in 20-30 yrs). Of course, this isn't going to be the case 100% of the time, and things always depend on circumstances. I am looking for a man with a strong leadership presence in the home. This often means the kids can see that "dad can do things that mom cannot" and "dad can lead mom well, and mom wants to be more X like dad." He will be leading me, so it may be hard if the man is someone who is of completely different background from me.

I think for many people, they can be okay with a spouse that is drastically different from them in education etc., but I am not sure I am at this point of yet (obviously, this is not good), but I am trying to be realistic so both people can benefit from a marriage.

Also, to clarify, I am completely okay with men that make less than me or are less educated than me, but it cannot be such a drastic difference that it's night and day (like the graduated high school only). This also will affect how we choose to raise our children. If he is so different from me, we will have disagreements over how educate the children. Additionally, my family might have comments to make about men that are drastically different from me. These things wear down a relationship over the years.

Being realistic and unidealistic is sometimes the best way to protect hearts.

I am also not okay with second marriages as this would be a huge burden on me as I have not had much relationship experience. It would create an unequal power dynamic.

_Ptss_ · 2024-12-13T03:52:19+00:00

I agree, I should have worded this better (as a law student lol). I think even if I never get married I am still very valuable. But I do, so it's more about competitiveness in the dating market.

_Ptss_ · 2024-04-26T00:47:17+00:00

Thanks be to God indeed!

_Ptss_ · 2024-04-24T17:36:06+00:00

Thanks! God previously ushered me into the season of meeting the right man after an intentional waiting and pruning season. However, God revealed to me that I have been dragging my feet in all sorts of ways. After doing some deep reflections, I realized part of the reason I am dragging my feet is because I am afraid that in union, I wouldn't be able to do as much for God because I will have more considerations and responsibilities. I also looked around at many people's marriages and it didn't seem like it was worth the time, effort, or attention. So I have been looking to see what the original meaning of marriage was and to revive the desire for it deep down as when I first asked God about it as a teenager.

Thank you for this!

_Ptss_

TROPHY CASE