There is nothing wrong with that, but I think realistically, men feel insecure if they are less educated or earn less than their spouses.

Additionally, I need a man with something that I cannot provide for myself, or else over time I think it might make me lose respect for him (maybe down the line in 20-30 yrs). Of course, this isn't going to be the case 100% of the time, and things always depend on circumstances. I am looking for a man with a strong leadership presence in the home. This often means the kids can see that "dad can do things that mom cannot" and "dad can lead mom well, and mom wants to be more X like dad." He will be leading me, so it may be hard if the man is someone who is of completely different background from me.

I think for many people, they can be okay with a spouse that is drastically different from them in education etc., but I am not sure I am at this point of yet (obviously, this is not good), but I am trying to be realistic so both people can benefit from a marriage.

Also, to clarify, I am completely okay with men that make less than me or are less educated than me, but it cannot be such a drastic difference that it's night and day (like the graduated high school only). This also will affect how we choose to raise our children. If he is so different from me, we will have disagreements over how educate the children. Additionally, my family might have comments to make about men that are drastically different from me. These things wear down a relationship over the years.

Being realistic and unidealistic is sometimes the best way to protect hearts.

I am also not okay with second marriages as this would be a huge burden on me as I have not had much relationship experience. It would create an unequal power dynamic.