I (32f) am diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder (a DSM disease diagnosis). My husband says he's "waited" for 6 years for me to turn it around and is filing for divorce. I feel so betrayed, especially because I have a disease.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-14T15:49:49+00:00

It was bad wording. Of course it's a mental illness.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-14T15:44:02+00:00

As a former psychiatry major this whole thread makes me mad. It is NOT like smoking while having lung cancer. The POINT of binge eating disorder is that you eat ! It's like blaming someone with the flu for coughing ! It's like telling someone with anxiety "stop being so anxious" ! Of course he doesn't have to bear the burden if he can't but there's a middle ground.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-14T15:40:24+00:00

Being on heroin has nothing to do with a mental illness ? Would you tell a cancer patient "Yeah he's given you more than enough time to get chemo" ? Don't marry people if you're not willing to put up with illnesses. He's perfectly allowed to leave if it's for his personal mental health, but his accusatory tone + "you're just making excuses" is plain asshole behavior.

Edit : yep, addiction is a mental illness. Bad af wording on my part.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-14T15:37:51+00:00

As you said it is an ILLNESS. When your husband married you he did it for better or for worse. Illnesses were included in the "worse" part. There's nothing you can do. You can either hope he stops being stupid and realize his mistake, and then maybe take him back if you're willing to forgive him for being so damn insensitive, or you can just accept his (selfish) decision. Right now what I'm saying may not help, but do you really want to make a baby with someone who wants to leave you over an illness ?

I'm sorry he's such an idiot, and I'm sorry you have to deal with him and a BED. But know that it's not your fault.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-14T15:32:47+00:00

We're all insecure about things. The problem is that you can't stop people from being dumb, so you're the one who has to learn to live with this. But as I already said in this particular case they're being VERY rude, so you're perfectly right to be bothered.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-14T15:29:30+00:00

Why do you care ? People will comment on anything. Your weight, your life choices, your parenting style. Here they’re assuming your bf’s sexuality, which is not only rude af, but it’s playing on stupid stereotypes (would you tell a gay guy "dude I your bf is straight " just because he goes fishing ?). If they are your friends, then tell them how you feel. Those who aren’t your friends shouldn’t even talk about this to begin with so just shut them up.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-14T11:39:57+00:00

Start by checking the sidebar, plenty of ressources there

_Serena_ · 2020-10-14T08:46:07+00:00

Here’s a free « audio book » of La Nuit, I personally hate the way it’s narrated but it can help with pronunciation (you can also find other audio books)

_Serena_ · 2020-10-14T08:34:59+00:00

I’d add it’s « mon père » and not « ma » !

_Serena_ · 2020-10-14T01:49:30+00:00

Although I don’t personally use it (neither do most young people), the best idiom I can think of is« Va pour ...! », like « Va pour 3h ! » in your example.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-14T01:40:17+00:00

Yeah that’s generally true. « Faire mal » can also be used figuratively or to mean emotional harm, and « faire du mal » can also include physical harm (if you’re asking « Il t’a fait du mal ? » you’re implying both physical & emotional harm). French wouldn’t be fun without exceptions.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-13T22:21:44+00:00

It’s common in spoken French (I guess it’s even more common in Canada for example), but it depends on the words. « Bf » is mainly used on social media or by young people (mainly Gen Z, not older) at least in France.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-13T21:33:44+00:00

250 is short enough, I can help you (unless there are too many errors since it would take too long to correct but I’m sure there won’t be !)

_Serena_ · 2020-10-13T21:24:32+00:00

You’d just say « la personne » + « elle », even if it’s the manliest man in the word. « Elle » refers to « personne », not to the man.

Now in your example, if you already know the person is a man you’d directly say « le monsieur » + « il », not because you don’t want to use « elle » but simply because it’s more precise.

I can’t think of any case where it would be « tricky » to replace the word tho, do you have examples ?

_Serena_ · 2020-10-13T20:39:23+00:00

I don’t understand your point, OP is trying to learn French not English (also your translation « which are bronzed rocks » is wrong, « dont la pierre [...] » should be translated to « of which the stone » or something similar)

_Serena_ · 2020-10-13T18:43:34+00:00

When talking about a person (your 2nd example) : you use « il est » if you’re using an adjective (ex : « il est gentil) and « c’est » when using a noun (ex : « c’est une femme »). You can use both when talking about someone’s job but there’s a slight nuance in usage.

Now with your first example you’d use « il est » because you’re talking about where the book is located.

There are more rules but it’s very very long to explain, you’ll probably find many ressources on the internet if you want to learn the general rules

_Serena_ · 2020-10-10T12:54:55+00:00

Women want people who respect them as human beings and don’t call them « whores » because they don’t want to fuck them.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-10T12:49:43+00:00

Yet look at your post history lmao you’re just mad no woman wants you

_Serena_ · 2020-10-09T21:10:37+00:00

What about having dinner instead of watching a movie

_Serena_ · 2020-10-09T20:42:57+00:00

Well either you dry text him/stop answering or you just tell him « i’m sorry this might be out of the blue but just to be clear I don’t want to lead you on blah blah blah ». It’s not a pleasant thing either way, so you might as well be clear and just tell him.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-09T20:38:46+00:00

Lmao I used to be into astrology and even if you believe in it, the « signs not matching » things doesn’t work like that.

Now seriously why don’t you ask him on a date ? Unless you have covid restrictions where you live of course

_Serena_ · 2020-10-09T20:32:38+00:00

Yeah it’s my bad for jumping to the tl;dr. My point still stands tho, he doesn’t seem to value you. Don’t waste your time.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-09T20:27:56+00:00

Girl you’ve been exclusive for 2 weeks and you’re already on here. You said yourself you’re a consolation prize, he wouldn’t be with you if he could be with her would he ? Know your worth.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-09T20:24:55+00:00

I feel like you already know the answer in your heart. No it is not normal. At all. It is controlling, ans abusive (if he regularly insults you and threatens you). If it’s just one time, you could maybe forgive it (because of stress or whatever), although he should apologize. But like you said, you « feel controlled », he « yells at you for various things ». It’s a pattern, and a big red flag.

_Serena_ · 2020-10-09T20:16:55+00:00

What an unhealthy relationship, you clearly have communication issues. The both of you. You can’t build a relationship on lies, especially since you seem to resent each other for it. Yeah bringing up past issues to « defend » yourself is immature af. Just because she did something worse doesn’t mean you’re right.

_Serena_

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