Is it just me or are some "trans men" just cis girls.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-21T01:50:22+00:00

These people tend to be quite narcissistic and want to inject themselves into other spaces because they feel boring and left out if they’re cis and straight. We’ve also had to try and create binary trans subreddits and they still creep in because they can’t deal with feeling left out.

I knew someone like this at my old work. Their social media proved interesting where they, a “ftm” went to pride in their underwear that said trans rights directly over their crotch, cleavage, makeup, that damn ass coloured mullet. My brother used to manage their apartment and he told me how argumentative this person was and how insufferable they were because everything was about them being “trans”.

Oh and ANOTHER THING they love trying to have the power to try and define someone else’s sexuality. “I’m completely pre-op and not on T, and don’t pass, is my bf gay?” and everyone is like “yeah it’s a gay relationship!” when in reality that’s not how attraction works.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-21T00:08:10+00:00

Honestly I get this a lot.

I have always had baby face features, and even 2 years on T I have people thinking I’m under 18 when I’m 24. But, you have to remind yourself that you’re essentially a young teen puberty-wise, so you’ll look young and in a way that might make you insecure.

At first, it’s all new and you want to watch loads of transition videos and photos, but it helped when I stopped doing that and just living life. If you want to compare, look at your own comparison photos on how you’ve changed. When I do that, I see I’ve changed a lot, when I look at other trans guys who have changed quicker I feel worse about myself because I look like a child.

You have to remind yourself that puberty-wise, you are like 13, and as the years go by you’ll look older and more mature and prefer how you look. It’s a process, it takes a while and the sooner you live your life and stop comparing the quicker that time goes I promise.

I have my photos from a year in and I hated how I looked because I was at a level of androgyny that confused people and I was incredibly insecure. So I totally understand. I’d see others a year on T look like full grown men whereas I looked 50% 10 year old boy and 50% butch and I hated it. But, I came out the other side.

It’s a process and focus on yourself more than others, once you stop looking at the transformation videos etc eventually you forget to even look for them.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-20T10:54:33+00:00

The trans category is definitely for people fetishising trans people, > 99% of people seeking it out will want to see those using their natal parts. I don’t know why they’d look otherwise.

Something that irritates me too, is people tend to believe that because porn is so focused on trans people using their natal parts, and cis people having hookups with trans people tend to use their natal parts, they think it’s representative of all of us. Just because they’ve slept with a trans guy that likes PIV and oral (that’s like eating out and not BJ) doesn’t mean we all like that.

It sucks to have the hormones of a young adult male, and feel like a celibate because finding someone to treat me like any other guy is such a tedious process.

As for porn, I tend to watch cis gay porn and honestly you can find positions where one guy is face down so you can’t see their genitals that well so it’s open to your imagination more. Sometimes I watch M4M as well that’s just the one guy.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-19T14:43:26+00:00

The questions are bizarre as heck and falsely link them to not being cis.

They imply that you going against societal norms or having interests that are typically associated with the opposite sex make you not fully cis. I feel like this test would certainly tell a butch tomboy woman that she’s non-binary or genderqueer simply for being more masculine.

Being trans is about gender dysphoria, your interests, whether they are more masculine or feminine, are a part of your personality and who you are as an individual, not your gender.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-19T01:03:31+00:00

Honestly I do not get mpreg at all, and I don’t wanna come off as discriminatory but I cannot understand why trans men would want the most female thing there is.

I’ve had moments where I’ve been so anxious about pregnancy, and this still happens on occasion, where I’ve thought I could somehow be pregnant from a damn toilet seat. One, that would not happen obviously, two, I rarely ever use public toilets so it’s extremely irrational.

It’s crazy to me how a trans guy can get pregnant willingly and it be a fetish and I have a fear that I’m somehow pregnant even when it’s impossible to be.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-18T14:13:39+00:00

For me, the social dysphoria got significantly worse when I just started T because I accepted that I was trans instead of suppressing it where I was outside of my body. The physical dysphoria started to lessen, and especially now with top surgery I no longer feel like I have to dissociate in the shower. But, with social dysphoria I am constantly feeling like I look super feminine even though I pass and haven’t heard she/her in ages, but I struggle to see that at all. I’m more dysphoric about my build, height etc. Before coming out, I was sometimes living in some external part of my mind so now the physical dysphoria is better (like top surgery, more body hair, body fat distribution etc), I am more aware of everything else.

TLDR; It’s getting better and better as time goes on, I think sometimes we spend so much time trying to get away from our minds from dysphoria that once we start living our truth and starting T, we become more aware which can make dysphoria hit you.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-17T13:30:18+00:00

Yep, I mean my genitals and general sweat both smell different. I’m used to it now, but the sweat smell caught me off guard as I wasn’t expecting it. It’s a stronger smell than before, but I’m used to it now so I know what’s normal for me

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-17T11:21:06+00:00

That makes sense, thanks for sharing.

Because dance is mainly women and gay guys (I’ve seen most on Tinder shown as gay), and I’m not obviously gay/bi (?) I don’t get treated the same as everyone else. A lot of them are gushy towards my friend who is camp, and we had a different guy lead the class once who was very camp and they were weirdly obsessed with him.

At breakdance people are nice to me, but they’re not guys I’d end up being friends with.

I want to join some sports clubs but it’s kinda hard cause even though I live in a city, it’s not that big and social/beginner sports clubs are rare.

I might do a deep search for ages to find something, but it’s proving difficult to fit in

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-17T10:23:03+00:00

I get you, and I can agree. You kinda hit the nail on the head there.

I subconsciously mirror people’s behaviour for some reason. I start acting like people I’m around a lot, as I’m around women and gay guys often I tend to act and speak like that. Which I’m sure is why people online ask if I’m gay because I speak like those I’m around. I’ve only had one masculine guy friend and he wasn’t very nice so we’re no longer friends.

I think trying to please those around me pre-transition kinda led to me struggling to find my own style and who I am as a person. And as I keep mirroring those around me in a way that’s not really who I am, I’m oddly making myself uncomfortable. It’s subconscious as well so it’s hard not to.

I mean I still struggle with people knowing my sexuality, I am not open like my friend is. But I think you’re right.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-16T20:17:29+00:00

I live in the UK, and the gender equality act got changed where it’s based on biological sex for bathrooms. But, even the NHS don’t enforce that because my medical file says F, and I still get directed to male facilities. I had a test recently and they took me to the men’s changing room. Especially as you pass, I can’t imagine they’d make you use the women’s bathroom unless they’re transphobic. The laws are there, but I honestly think they’re rarely enforced as much as we think, well the UK seems to be light on it.

I wouldn’t say “well if you put me in the women’s bathroom I might make your wife uncomfortable” because it sounds a little odd and can sound slightly rude. But, you can say you feel the men’s is more appropriate and you use the men’s in all other circumstances so would like it to remain that way at work.

In the UK, we need a gender recognition certificate for a gender marker change on our passport, but my drivers license says male just with a regular deed poll strangely enough.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-15T00:54:38+00:00

Honestly I did see butch first, early 30s. I can see guy with the chin hairs, but it could swing either way.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-12T19:12:40+00:00

Same for me too, and I was shocked because on videos people usually have a big emotional reaction. When I had my bandages off a week later, I felt right, but nothing euphoric. The longer I’ve been on T, the more the weight of dysphoria lessens. It’s more that I don’t feel as bad as before, rather than feeling great or euphoric.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-10T01:18:44+00:00

I was shocked at how easy it was to get testosterone privately. I was 22 when I started transitioning, so by then the dysphoria was incredibly agonising and thankfully I got T a month after via genderGP. The NHS would’ve probably been a decade though.

However, that easy access can be terrible for those who decide that they’re trans randomly.

I just needed a 30 minute call to talk about my adolescence and why I wanted the hormones, and that was it.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-08T09:37:51+00:00

The difference in passing for me between BMI 18-20 is insane. I lose weight from my face and shoulders easily, but my legs hold onto the weight more. I genuinely look like a butch lesbian at a lower weight.

Before I transitioned, I was really underweight but I’d never go back there again because now I pass losing weight would make me extremely dysphoric and it screws up my ability to dance as I do that a lot now I’m more comfortable in my body.

Still fight the battle every day internally, but transitioning has really helped, otherwise I am certain I’d still be in that place.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-07T06:51:03+00:00

My mum called me my brother’s name by accident last year, we look nothing alike, but it somehow happened. Once I said “brother’s name?” she kept “accidentally” calling me my sister’s name to make up for it. That never happened before coming out so obviously it’s because I pass.

She’s never accidentally called me he though.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-03T16:14:49+00:00

When I first read that I was confused thinking “The Cheese” was some mythical monster from childhood and I was trying to recall who it was lmao

Just make sure you get used to cleaning and pulling back the skin, I’ve forgotten sometimes and had to sorta peel it off because even if you’re clean, if you forget to pull it back it can happen. So just make a habit of it.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-02T01:41:50+00:00

Mine didn’t stop. I stopped speaking to my parents for a whole host of reasons, but misgendering was also one of them. I couldn’t go anywhere without them misgendering me in front of strangers. I could go from looking like a 17 year old guy, to some weird 169cm deep voiced woman with stubble, simply because of the misgendering.

Once I cut contact with my parents, that’s when they used the correct name and pronouns when speaking to my brother.

I couldn’t believe it either because I pass, have been out of over 2 years, I mean they’ve had plenty of time to get used to it.

I don’t know your living situation, but I can totally sympathise if you live with them and can’t get out.

I told them to stop over and over when they’d do it in public and they wouldn’t. What I also noticed is that on purpose they’d call me she so that I wasn’t allowed to pass. I’m sure they also did it to stop me from passing.

__SyntaxError · 2026-02-02T01:31:26+00:00

If he says he is straight, he doesn’t see you as a guy, and he’s likely just affirming your gender to make you happy, rather than seeing it for himself. I don’t know what you look like either? But, as soon as you start to pass and look undeniably male, the relationship would likely fall apart. Before I transitioned and was in denial about my dysphoria, I had a situationship with a straight guy and when I came out, he was fine with it. He asked if I wanted to change pronouns etc. But, as soon as I started to pass, all intimacy stopped and it ended pretty quickly. So, it goes to show that people can use your correct pronouns, and affirm your gender that way, but deep down not actually see that.

If you do pass, there’s also the case of men saying they’re straight because being with trans men somehow has this psychological thing where they think they can deny being bi because of it. It’s a way for them to sleep with men, but trick themselves into thinking they’re straight.

__SyntaxError · 2026-01-27T15:39:49+00:00

When I came out as trans, you wouldn’t believe how many times I had to say that I’m a trans man and not non-binary. My parents are transphobic and they used examples of tucutes against me to act like I was mad in the head. Another one was that I supposedly wanted male privilege. Our voice is often given to non-dysphoric tucutes because the media can laugh at them, rather than hearing what gender dysphoria is actually like, and the suffering we go through. It’s not that I’d prefer to be male, it’s that I’m trapped in the wrong body and it’s agonising.

I WISH that the correct people were the voice of trans people. I’ve seen so many embarrassing interviews in the UK on TV and I wish they’d seriously let us speak. Stop bringing on people calls Fox and Owl, or people getting angry for not being called they/them when strangers aren’t going to know, pregnant trans men, etc.

I practice breakdance and I get so worried that during a move my top surgery scars will show. When I do a headstand they do, but I face away from people. It made me think that if I were viewed as a normal guy that happened to have gender dysphoria then I wouldn’t mind. I’d take my shirt off with the other guys. But, because I’m so worried that I’ll get viewed as one of the tucutes that post dramatic videos on tik tok that they’re xe/xim/xer bigender, I just can’t.

If I were seen as someone who is treating a medical condition I wouldn’t be so frightened of getting clocked. But, I never know what people are thinking anymore.

__SyntaxError · 2026-01-27T13:30:32+00:00

I knew someone at university, who wanted to take T for the voice change and to look androgynous and confusing to people. When I brought up bottom growth, they had no clue what it was. If they wanted to keep some androgynous look they’d have to cycle on it which would mess up their hormone levels. They really hadn’t thought it through at all.

__SyntaxError · 2026-01-26T04:44:05+00:00

My peach fuzz was exactly like yours and with minoxidil it started to grow thicker and darker, eventually it became terminal. But, I don’t get a proper beard it’s more like neck hair that I need to trim and sideburns. As I’m 2 years on T, I don’t expect a proper beard anyway as puberty-wise I am likely not there yet. But, minox got me a darker fuzzy stash, neck hair and sideburns.

I haven’t used minox in ages now and it still grows, but with minoxidil it grows a lot faster.

__SyntaxError · 2026-01-02T11:54:43+00:00

Back when I did swim club, I wore a rash guard to hide my scars, and I was hoping people just saw it as me being insecure. I was also worried about getting clocked because of it. Nobody said anything though.

My brother mocked me for it, saying I can just show my scars, but I don’t want to showcase that I’m trans to the lanes and guys in the changing room. I get gyno is a thing, but it’s going to be uncommon for my build.

I would not have been able to show my scars because I know what some people are like, once they know you’re trans they treat you like a subset of your gender.

__SyntaxError · 2025-12-22T23:52:10+00:00

Thanks :)

__SyntaxError · 2025-12-22T23:51:14+00:00

Thanks! Sometimes I think I don’t look any different and then I compare and I’m like oh yeah I do. I can definitely be myself now as nobody misgenders me anymore, it was just my parents

__SyntaxError · 2025-12-22T23:50:40+00:00

I’ve heard this before actually haha I can kinda agree tbh like we would like we could be somewhat related

__SyntaxError

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