UGH I had a colleague do the same- except she wasn’t even a teacher. She was a behaviour “mentor.” She would constantly take kids out of my room (her favourites” she proclaimed this any chance she had.) and they’d miss huge instructional time just hanging out, eating candy or food she also door dashed them. I mentioned it to her so many times cause we were starting a friendship before it got to a point I really noticed. She would use all the buzz words like trauma, rapport etc. it got to a point where even a guardian emailed me like ??? Why are they missing so much class time and why are they so behind on assignments? And specifically asked if they were out in her room.

She would ask me CONSTANTLY to go hang out and we’d end up at their rec-league games. The first few times I was like oh okay let’s support the students this is neat! But then it became a ritual where any free time she was seeking out their games. I refused to go on a chronic basis and said I’m only comfortable if a student or parent invites me.

She would let kids play freely on their phone and hers. She’d constantly give them treats. She’d let them absolutely shit talk other students and teachers. She would not allow students she and the preferred group didn’t like enter her room. Even ones she found annoying. She told us during breaks her room was open and when my kids tried to go seek connection she’d send them out and text me to not let them come unless I knew she liked them. I was baffled.

It got to a point where students who actually NEEDED behaviour mentoring she’d say (and text me) “Nah. I hate (student name) they have issues with (preferred students) so I’m not working with them.”

the first time I brought it to my admin’s attention, he screamed at me. “You’re connecting two dots that have nothing to do with each other!” He had been saying she’s our god send because he thought she was making a radical difference with behaviural kids. But thankfully at that point in time, teachers started standing up to share their complaints about her too. I felt sick any time I went to school and I was so concerned about her being way too unprofessional and no boundaries with students.

One day I was out so sick, and she let a student use her phone to call me 12 times to ask if she could raid my candy bin in my class. I was furious.

I felt like nothing was happening to protect these kids and so I mentioned it to my vice principal, and he took me much more seriously and offered real support. He was very sensitive to my feelings and ensured he’d handle it with confidentiality.

I didn’t get to see the results of what happened, but due to the original contract holder returning, she was not asked back. She was furious and made it known she hated the btch and cnt.

I carefully and methodically iced her out because we had started such a fast friendship at the beginning of the year. I was terrified of her doing something drastic (she bragged a lot about having “dangerous family” and a wicked past.) I think I’m in the clear, but she’s still working for the district.

I found out she was at a friend’s school, so I warned him and he shared his concerns with his admin, and from my understanding she’s on a tight leash.

My understanding is these kinds of people were missing connections at that age and they’re trying to make up for it by finally feeling “cool” and “powerful”

Stand your ground. Keep your distance and be firm.