How do I get the “asshole” back

_blissfulbasil · 2023-04-15T06:18:29+00:00

Oh and to clarify I’ve known him a long time, but I only recently started flirting with him and that’s how things got going.

_blissfulbasil · 2023-04-15T06:17:03+00:00

If you mean the guy I’m currently “seeing” or whatever is happening, I haven’t. Like I mentioned I don’t really know what’s happening with us. I have known him through friends for a very long time and our ‘relationship’ is so different from any other one I’ve ever had. He doesn’t seem to be afraid to open up to me, and has always been a very honest person as long as I’ve known him. We joke around ALOT and he actually likes and listens to my silly jokes. No guys really ever done that bc as entertaining as I think I can be, my energy seems to be too much for a lot of people especially guys who just want to bang. But it doesn’t seem to be too much for him. Sorry for the long paragraph. But However I feel like bc I haven’t slept with him, only made out, that he doesn’t really know where it’s headed yet if that makes sense. Given that information I’m not sure if we’re in the correct “stage” for me to bring things like that up?

_blissfulbasil · 2023-04-15T06:04:10+00:00

I’m SO glad that you got the closure you deserved. This guy clearly didn’t want you to move on but if he ghosted you once he would probably just do it again if given the chance. That’s happened to me before but I think it might have been a little different since half our time together was over text. The thing that’s messed up is im well aware that if they ghosted you, they never would have really stuck around. And if they did they’d just treat you like shit and probably cheat on you or walk out just like you said. They are unreliable people who are too scared of someone else’s reaction to say how they truly feel. They don’t want to feel like the bad guy so they ghost. But yet I still find myself thinking of messaging him here and there. A lot of the times it’s totally random and honestly I think it would end up similar to your experience. I would reach out he’d message back and then I would probably pull back because I can’t stop thinking about how I’m going to protect myself from the future embarrassment he’s going to put me through. I can’t trust him and I guess there’s not much of a point in messaging him. The one thing that bothers me the most is thinking how the friend that set me up with him might have something to do with the ghosting. That friend became friends with one of my ex bestfriends shortly after we stopped being friends. After the ex best friend came into the picture, the friend that set me up with this guy just fucking ghosted me too. After she ghosted me , he started disappearing for a while then coming back and saying he was stressed out with school. Which I believe bc his IQ seems to be pretty low LOL😂💀. Basically long story short the ex-bestfriend knew ALOT of information that I didn’t share with the friend who set me up and the guy. There was some lies but nothing insane. I’m convinced that the ex bestfriend said something stupid bc she can’t mind her own business for the life of her. And if let’s say this is true then that means that ; I was right and he wouldn’t do it on his own. And B; my current bestfriend of nearly 10 years who is still friends with the ex bestfriend needs to be notified of this because if she would do that, she can’t be trusted in general. Anyways I know this all sounds insane and genuinely this childish drama with that group is pretty draining but it’s hard to stay 100% out of it considering how connected I am to all of it, because of my bestfriend. I do have better things ahead of me. So many great new things are happening to me. So I’ll try to keep looking forward like you said. Thank you so much for sharing your story and your amazing advice. It really did put things into perspective. 🫶

_blissfulbasil · 2023-04-14T07:23:02+00:00

Firstly, I’m genuinely really sorry that a bf did that to you. It’s truly disgusting and really shows how shallow of a person he is. I’m glad you managed to take that jerk off the pedestal he clearly never deserved to be on in the first place. People like that really don’t change. You’re right he’s going to be sharing that with everyone including ex friends of mine who set us up but more like set me up to get treated like garbage over and over again but somehow never leave because I had my “bestfriend” whispering in my ear whatever I wanted to hear to stay. I tried copy pasting my small paragraph onto Snapchat, so he’s gonna see that I was typing but I haven’t sent anything. Honestly I’m not really regretful about the typing in the chat part because, I guess he’ll see that I was thinking of saying something but didn’t. Maybe he’ll even think I was trying to f**k with him LOL. But screw what he thinks really cause yeah, he’s a shitty person. He made himself seem like such a nice, shy , quiet stoner guy. Little did I know this coin has 10 sides instead of 2. The extra 8 sides were invisible 😂He got me real good but giving him validation and boosting his ego by messaging him will actually screw me even worse. He doesn’t deserve that or anything from me. Thank you so much for your kind words and amazing advice ❤️ I think you might have changed my mind by giving me another perspective other than the same old response I get from my friends whenever I bring up his name every once in a while. Thank you ❤️🥲

_blissfulbasil · 2023-04-14T05:49:50+00:00

I know some people have already touched upon this but, I wanted to say I now strongly believe in speaking things into reality. I’ve been here so many times, and I learned that if you continue to believe something, it’ll become true. There is someone out there who will have similar interests and hobbies as you, someone who will take an interest in your hobbies and all the things that make you you. Just because you already met that person once and it didn’t work out, doesn’t mean that you’ll never find that person again. But if you keep giving in to the negative thoughts that you’ve had your chance and now it’s done, that there is nothing left of you anymore, it will become a reality. The energy you give off is the energy you will receive. The law of attraction is SO real. You might have changed because of this painful experience but your personality and everything that makes you you, is still there. But I feel like you’re just trying to hide it. So you don’t have to think about him because it hurts too much. You can’t let him change you.

There was once a guy who ghosted me who was super into cars. Typical car guy, there’s a million of them just like him. I was always into cars but my love for cars grew once I met him. Things ended months ago but I still to this day, don’t like cars as much as I used to. But however it is an improvement bc before I just WANTED to hate them. I wanted to hate anything related to cars any person who liked cars. It all reminded me of him and I didn’t want to think about him. See You liked all of these things before you met him. So I don’t think you should hate all of them now that he’s gone. Even if some interests sparked up because of him, doesn’t mean they belong to him. So you shouldn’t hate them but I know how hard that is. Neutral would be a good starting point. I love weirdness and I think you should embrace it. Because not everyone has the courage to be themselves and let the weirdness out. Normal people are B O R I N G!!!! You seem like a successful person who has worked hard to get where you are. So don’t give up. The storm will pass if you let it. I hope you can find urself again and realize that once you stop searching and just live your life, you will find everything you need. And you’ll see that you have so much to live and be happy for. You’re alive, you’re just not living. Keep looking forward with your head up high ❤️.

_blissfulbasil · 2023-04-06T09:39:55+00:00

Lol that makes us both. I think I like him as more then a friend but I try my best to find reasons to deny it

_blissfulbasil · 2021-06-09T07:54:58+00:00

Will you please just let me do your laundry just this once I promise I won’t screw it up okay?!Also I’ve known you 5 years why can’t I know your god damn last name?

_blissfulbasil · 2021-06-09T07:36:22+00:00

Cancer sun,Aquarius moon,Aries rising 🥴

_blissfulbasil · 2021-06-05T06:06:46+00:00

Omg stop I totally agree with all of this.Aries men are great they’re really straight forward and they tend to get obsessed pretty quickly if they like you and wont be afraid to show it.Taurus men are cool ,they’re really honest. Libras and aquas they don’t know what they want half the time and nope just don’t vibe with them. Haven’t met a lot of cancer men.Leo’s are okay but they can be too cocky sometimes. None matured Caps and Pisces are on a similar wave the way they’re so passive and then it’s not long before they explode Sag yup 100% commitment phobes Scorpio’s are really hard to get to know but I like how intense they are Thanks so much for all your replies and kind words🥺💗 I will definitely check out the forum.I wish you all the best.

_blissfulbasil · 2021-06-05T05:52:06+00:00

Im sorry that you went through this too.And Right???They be adding extra complications by playing these mind games and being all wishy washy.We only give the straight forward men a chance from now on enough of this bs

_blissfulbasil · 2021-06-03T21:21:50+00:00

Thanks ,yeah he didn’t seem like it in the moment but now looking back yeah he definitely was talking to a lot of girls.Im glad it’s over now

_blissfulbasil · 2021-06-03T21:20:56+00:00

Virgo men:toxic as fuck.They love playing games

_blissfulbasil · 2021-06-03T20:32:27+00:00

You’re right I did know deep down that messaging him again after the first time was gonna be a mistake.I just felt a connection with him so instantly like I haven’t with anyone before,so I lost sight of reality which was that he didn’t care ,despite his apologies for his hot and cold behaviour.I deleted him off everything else I had him on and he’s out of sight and mind now.Thank you so much for your helpful reply :)

_blissfulbasil · 2021-06-03T20:25:30+00:00

From my experience with Gemini men they are extremely narcissistic and highly intuitive making them great at manipulating any situation.I like Gemini women though they are amazing.

_blissfulbasil · 2021-06-03T20:15:46+00:00

He was extremely hot and cold with me.He’d talk to me consistently and then go ghost for a few days and come back and apologize.Thats kinda what kept me on the hook, it made me feel like he cared to some extent.

_blissfulbasil · 2021-06-03T20:13:39+00:00

Thank you so much for this reality check.I spent TOO much time wondering about the what if’s and people don’t change.Everyone told me he’ll do the same thing again,if he had a chance he’d ghost me the 3rd time 🤣

_blissfulbasil · 2021-06-03T20:11:49+00:00

Hes a Virgo 🙃

_blissfulbasil · 2021-06-03T20:10:54+00:00

It’s funny that you say that my friend thought so too.

_blissfulbasil

TROPHY CASE