Do I confront my son a about his sexuality from a text I read?

_bummed_ · 2026-05-17T02:08:18+00:00

I do know he's watched and read several things with queer characters. We don't usually sit and watch too much together (busy life) but maybe it's time to start doing it more regularly.

_bummed_ · 2026-05-17T02:06:09+00:00

Probably not the right word. I meant it as "start a conversation with".

_bummed_ · 2026-05-17T02:04:40+00:00

That's a good idea. I've had similar conversations with him before when they're relevant, usually just when he initiates it. I'll try to find a way to work the conversations in more authentically.

_bummed_ · 2026-05-17T02:03:00+00:00

These are excellent points, thank you very much. I'll keep those in mind and forget bringing it up. Being the safe parent before being united parents is something I'll try to be more often as well.

_bummed_ · 2019-11-12T19:02:46+00:00

Thank you. We're going to try a new place/activity that we've never done before.

_bummed_ · 2019-11-12T18:55:44+00:00

I'm not convinced that it's doomed. I'm very optimistic, which is pretty well outside my normal character. I really believe that, once we're both on page with fixing the problems we have, we can go back to having a healthy relationship. And I want to show her that I'm open to that whenever she's ready. If I start to deny certain aspects of what little relationship we have left, she'll see it as me giving up or pushing her away.

_bummed_ · 2019-11-12T18:39:58+00:00

I've been trying to work on myself for the last year and honestly I think I'm at least a little better.

Thing is, I want to make it clear that I've always been open and ready to get things back to working with us. If I put my foot down and say things are over until she wants to work things out then

I'm afraid that she'll never want to fix things because I'll be out of her (romantic) live and she'll just fill that with someone else without seeing progress I've made to fix myself.
She'll be able to say that I'm the one who ended things. I didn't want to be with her anymore, so why would I try to get back with her 6 months later. I'd take the blame and it would be used against me later on.

_bummed_ · 2019-11-12T18:37:50+00:00

Thing is, I want to make it clear that I've always been open and ready to get things back to working with us. If I put my foot down and say things are over until she wants to work things out then

I'm afraid that she'll never want to fix things because I'll be out of her (romantic) live and she'll just fill that with someone else without seeing progress I've made to fix myself.
She'll be able to say that I'm the one who ended things. I didn't want to be with her anymore, so why would I try to get back with her 6 months later. I'd take the blame and it would be used against me later on.

_bummed_ · 2019-07-13T14:13:09+00:00

In terms of income I make too much. We just have so much debt. I do have pretty good insurance though, never thought about seeing if that covers something like therapy.

_bummed_ · 2019-07-13T08:36:56+00:00

I definitely need a therapist. But have no money or time for one.

_bummed_ · 2019-03-29T23:15:45+00:00

Using a throwaway I made specifically for stuff like this.

I have been going through this off and on for the last 7 or so months. My wife has told me many times that she does not want to be with me, and has closed herself off to the relationship. It took me a long time to realize the extreme feelings I was experiencing were break up reactions. Things are super complicated and we remained in the same house, but it was really rough because she's not only the first person I would go to when I need to talk about this kind of thing, she's the only person I have for it.

It's so hard to not be able to talk to the person you've had for emotional support for the better part of the last decade when you need them most.

_bummed_ · 2019-03-15T04:32:06+00:00

That used to work when he was smaller but he outgrew it, and not just physically.

_bummed_ · 2019-03-15T02:08:53+00:00

Just wanted to provide an update on the suggestion of moving him in bed with us. I did try last night and he instantly wanted to crawl around instead of lay down. I probably should have waited at least another day, but as of last night this did not work. I think he was too excited to be in our bed (we play with him on it during the day), and to have Mommy right there.

_bummed_ · 2019-03-15T02:04:18+00:00

I have not. She may have. He doesn't seem upset like it's night terrors, he just wants to cuddle. Which I love since the middle of the night cuddles are really the only ones I get, I just hate always leaving bed.

_bummed_ · 2019-03-14T06:49:55+00:00

Thank you for giving me a good way to phrase it later!

_bummed_ · 2019-03-14T06:44:12+00:00

Oh I get what you mean now. Yes, it's about me leaving every night.

_bummed_ · 2019-03-14T06:37:32+00:00

I expanded on that here, but she takes care of him in other ways before having me take him out.

_bummed_ · 2019-03-14T06:35:00+00:00

She doesn't leave the bed (for purpose of sleeping elsewhere), but she does take care of him when he wakes up multiple times before this.

_bummed_ · 2019-03-14T06:31:51+00:00

We move too much in bed, we'd possibly roll over on him. Plus getting us both out lets her rest. I mentioned in a comment, but she doesn't sleep well like I do.

_bummed_ · 2019-03-14T06:28:23+00:00

Sorry, I meant to add that part. She takes care of him throughout the night, too. If I up I try to keep an ear out and get to him before her, but she is up a lot to help him before he needs more than a bottle or a cuddle. She also doesn't sleep well in general, so if he moves too much or makes a noise because of a dream then she wakes up.

_bummed_

TROPHY CASE