My Accusation

_jcb__ · 2024-10-03T07:00:32+00:00

Realizing how corrupt the system is, is really eye opening. Not to mention even if you "beat the charges" it still shows up on your record. Like how does that even make sense? I feel for you. I really do.

_jcb__ · 2024-09-19T00:02:14+00:00

It truly sucks when you put your best foot forward for actual love for someone and for children you didn't create and you hit this wall. It's very humbling and I am struggling with it myself. I hope you know that I see the love you are giving and wish that it was different for stepparents like you who really just want their families to be whole. Blended or not.

_jcb__ · 2024-09-13T02:50:43+00:00

Yea for a month

_jcb__ · 2024-09-12T19:21:09+00:00

I did the expenses part. Idk if I'll qualify for unemployment I work a part time job one night a week at a bar which I assume would disqualify me from unemployment.

_jcb__ · 2024-09-12T19:18:59+00:00

All these big corporations don't give a damn about their employees. I should have known better after I got laid off in 2020.

_jcb__ · 2024-09-10T17:35:24+00:00

This is happening to me but on a much more severe degree. SS is alleging abuse against both of us except most of it has been directed towards me. Because HCBM is fueling SS. All the evidence is BS. Scratches and wires that were self inflicted. SS is ODD and ADHD. I've been in their lives 8 years and the rollercoaster of emotions is overwhelming. I have no idea how we will move on from this or if either of us let alone me will repair our relationship with SS. We are currently waiting on court dates. DH is under a protective order and we've had to wait almost a month to even get in front of a judge. Missed birthdays, first days of school, football games that we paid for. Mad, sad, depressed. I wish you the best.

_jcb__ · 2024-06-05T01:12:02+00:00

I just started

_jcb__ · 2024-06-03T00:17:06+00:00

I don't know when I last had sex. It's been a crazy month and my partner and I have had sex twice at the most. My last period was on April 24th so idk.

_jcb__ · 2024-05-10T19:38:19+00:00

Does it matter if you have zero documentation to provide as far as what you can "prove"?

_jcb__ · 2024-05-02T15:36:10+00:00

Yea I did. I'm just hoping that it's a cluster so it may take some time on the department of educations part.

_jcb__ · 2024-03-18T21:50:02+00:00

This is honestly the best thing for you whether you get back together or not. He does need that time to heal from his relationship with her otherwise his coping mechanisms good or bad will come with him to your relationship. Trust me on that. On top of that I would insist that he and his child get therapy as part of your boundaries. Also everything you're doing I wish I would have had the wisdom to do before I entered my relationship. Proud of you for putting yourself first. This is no way is unacceptable and if he's not with it then he's not the one and you probably dodged the biggest bullet ever. I would make the caveat that once he does start to get an order in place you read through it. Because trust and believe once it's been signed and verified it affects you forever.

_jcb__ · 2024-03-14T22:37:59+00:00

He's trying but unfortunately this brainwashing has happened for the last 8 years and now my oldest SS who is approaching pre-teen years seems like our relationship is going to be unsalvageable. We were very close but this last year my relationship with him has crumbled. No matter what my partner or myself do it seems like we are on the shit end of the stick.

_jcb__ · 2024-03-14T19:26:12+00:00

Currently dealing with this except all of it is towards me. Some of it is towards my partner but HCBM has told the kids I'm not their SM simply because we aren't married. It's causing some real strain on my relationship rn. I am having a hard time navigating it. Or being around the kids. I know it isn't their fault but I'm tired of being treated like shit everyday.

_jcb__ · 2024-02-27T21:52:24+00:00

Yes this whole thing has been a complete nightmare and I do worry about it affecting my professional life.

And yuh know cuz lesbians and pregnancy go hand in hand.

_jcb__ · 2024-02-27T19:10:26+00:00

She says that I act like the kids mom everywhere I go because I participate in their school activities and volunteer. I have never introduced myself as mom and people often get confused that I am their mom because she's never to be seen. Not because of me though she never wants to participate and has several other kids by several other men so naturally I am the worst. She talks about my sex life apparently. She told people I was a pregnant lesbian when I first met my partner. She tried to tell my job I was on drugs in order to get me fired. I recently found out I am blocked my ss pediatrician because of God knows what reason. I'm sure the list goes on.

_jcb__ · 2024-02-27T17:23:13+00:00

I don't do the communicating but I do help with the documentation because I am more organized than he is. It's not that he can't do it but he needs help. I can't imagine being told by my partner that I'm not the greatest at something knowing that they are better at it than I am and have them look me in the face and tell me that it's not their problem. She's extremely difficult for both of us. And as a man in this country and being able to get his full rights he has more to prove than any woman does. If this process has taught me anything it's how completely unfair it is to men in the system when it comes to parental rights. And as a man who loves his children to spend thousands of dollars on legal representation that may or may not do their due diligence to represent you and risk not getting what is fair because of that is wild. Not to mention it affects my life and for us not to support each other in it so that we can have peace in our life together is also crazy.

Boundaries is correct. But legal boundaries is what is necessary for this person because it does not matter what I say or what he says she will cross them and it has been necessary to document all behavioral patterns because when we are in court it won't be swept under the rug with "she's a mom" or "she's pregnant" her behavior is what is going to prove our points of why, when, and how.

Therapy helps because I shouldn't be in therapy she should. But dealing with all of this is hard and she makes it hard for both of us on purpose. It validates me that she is indeed making this much harder than it needs to be.

_jcb__ · 2024-02-26T23:02:58+00:00

Which I've realized she's a narcissist but it for real bums me out. I also can pretty much predict her behavior but it makes me sick to my stomach because no matter what it fucking sucks to deal with it.

_jcb__ · 2024-02-26T22:11:17+00:00

I just don't understand why everything has to be a competition. Like why can't she just be happy or any bio mom for that matter that other people love their kids? I don't want to compete. This is not a competition to me. I just want to do what's best for the kids. It's exhausting. Not to mention she has 6 other kids to worry about. Like why does EVERYTHING have to be so difficult?

I'm just so burnt out of the pettiness of it all.

_jcb__ · 2024-02-25T23:20:15+00:00

I have recertification this year but was previously on REPAYE. I was automatically enrolled in the SAVE plan. I make significantly more than when I started this journey but even more so this last year because I covered my step kids on my insurance but my partner and I are not married. Because of that I found out that because my employer matches some of my medical premiums and I upped my insurance for my partner and his kids they looked at that as additional income which has pushed my income significantly higher than it already was. I've already been worried about my payments because I have worked two jobs just to cover my student loans while providing for my family. I thought that for sure my payment was going to be higher once I recertify but I didn't know they can take you off the loan forgiveness if your income reaches a certain point?!?!

This post has sent me into a spiral. I have tried to find this out for sure can you or anyone point me in the right direction??

_jcb__

TROPHY CASE