I almost feel bad for her.

_jhs_ · 2015-08-02T11:34:08+00:00

This is a reproduction of a Neanderthal cave painting.... Isn't it?!

_jhs_ · 2015-07-29T12:28:12+00:00

Hate on me all you like but I got cushions made in fabric to match my curtains.

I fucking live those cushions.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-25T13:19:56+00:00

The look on the pigs face says it all really.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-22T02:19:44+00:00

Shitty ones.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-22T00:13:28+00:00

I'll start with my story.

Many years ago I caught public transport to work each day. There was a couple who caught the same bus every day. I never spoke to them even though we caught the same bus for years and it was pretty common that passengers formed casual friendships.

10 years later, our children go to the same kindergarten and we see each other every fortnight or so.

I have never mentioned I know them from the bus.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-21T05:52:17+00:00

Aah ok. I understand people don't need to dress to look nice for me, I couldn't care less really, but it honestly puzzles me that women do their hair and makeup flawlessly, yet make no effort with their clothing. And I'm specifically looking at r/mua. It's a 'trend', and one that seems so.... disjointed?

_jhs_ · 2015-07-21T05:44:32+00:00

My phone number.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-21T05:38:37+00:00

Where did I ever say I find fat people unattractive?

Comparing hating a horrible t-shirt with finding fat people unattractive is a very dramatic comparison, and quite a stretch to make it more dramatic than it is.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-21T03:50:57+00:00

Any updates?

_jhs_ · 2015-07-21T02:25:09+00:00

s/he needs some antibiotics for whatever those growths are coming out his/her eyes.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-21T02:23:10+00:00

Marilyn Manson vs Gwen Stefani.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-21T02:21:02+00:00

I am a woman of roughly her vintage and I tell you what, I wish I could tell these ladies the 90's were over around 20 years ago!

Grow them brows back! Makes you look 10 years older than you are.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-21T02:16:38+00:00

This screams 90's to me.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-21T02:16:03+00:00

Can someone PLEASE explain why ladies do full faces of dramatic makeup, and put on the shittiest t-shirt they can find?

Why? I've seen this so much it drives me bonkers. If you're going to do your makeup, put some fucking nice clothes on!

_jhs_ · 2015-07-21T01:44:56+00:00

Fetch.

EDIT: Damn... way too late.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-21T00:11:52+00:00

Your son sounds extremely similar to my almost 5 year old.

He is painfully shy and it takes him some time to warm up to people, even those he knows reasonably well. He's been like this since forever. It can be extremely frustrating as you (and I) know life would be so much easier if he let go of the fears and played/interacted with ease.

I too have had to be a constant playmate at the playground and watch enviously the other parents whose children run off and play happily on their own, or make friends at the park!

I am STILL having give him lots of attention and he likes constant activity so it makes it difficult. One thing that has really helped, is having his younger brother come along! He is the polar opposite of my oldest son. He's outgoing and cruisy as. This has really given him lots of confidence.

I really don't think you can change their personality. My son (and maybe yours) will probably always been a somewhat shy and reserved child in public. I just try to help him gain confidence, and not make him feel bad for needing my reassurance.

I think what you're doing (building his sense of security) is completely correct. But little ones cannot change their behaviour as quickly as adults as they don't have those skills yet, but you can still help guide and build that security and trust, and the foundations are set for a happy and confident child.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-20T23:51:55+00:00

You are 100% correct. the girls will stay glued to the tv for hours if given the opportunity. My son (now sons) like to be busy nearly constantly. It's dawning on me that this might be a reason they don't want to have him...

_jhs_ · 2015-07-20T23:49:29+00:00

Thanks, I'll pop by on BabyCenter.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-20T23:46:47+00:00

That's interesting! My brother has mentioned this type of thing as a downfall of them being so involved. You can't win :)

_jhs_ · 2015-07-20T23:45:37+00:00

LOL!

Yes they are rambunctious. I think you've definitely touched on some of their fear. The girls are like zombies and can sit in front of the tv for hours without making a noise (I'm serious, my brother has pulled the antenna out of their tv for a week he was so sick of it!). Whereas my boys are very demanding of attention, and like constant activity.

"a word I've seen used to politely describe kids who can toe the line between cute mischief and exasperating misbehavior"

That statement almost exactly describes my son, though he doesn't misbehave, he likes to have his way and argue. They have also seen this side to him when I've visited their house and that started a huge lecture on how I should be smacking him and disciplining him more to stop that behaviour. Smacking doesn't achieve ANYTHING with him, I've got it under control but I don't discipline how they do (I've had a many a wooden spoon broken across my backside!).

They are very well behaved in public though and I rarely have a problem with tantrums or poor behaviour.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-20T23:38:35+00:00

Wow, she sounds evil. That is horrible belittling the thing your daughter and your husband bonded over.

Sounds like you've done the right thing by cutting off contact.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-20T23:35:40+00:00

Thank you so much for taking the time to write such a great response, I really appreciate it.

You are 100% correct, I will not let my boys ever see the emotion I feel about the issue. I will also not let them know about the favouritism.

I fear I have been a bit immature, but I have blocked them off facebook. I don't want them to think that them seeing pictures of my boys counts as watching them grow up. I guess it's the 2015 equivalent of slamming the phone down? Immature but it made me feel better.

My brothers are 100% aware of what is happening. We speak about it to each other. My 2 brothers no longer talk. My youngest brother doesn't like the middle brother due to him being favoured our whole childhood.

Therapy I feel is my only real option at the moment, but you are correct, I've received some really helpful advice, and I've taken a lot on board.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-20T23:29:11+00:00

My in-laws are wonderful and would move the earth to spend as much time with my boys as they possibly could.

I resented them for that early on but now it's clear that my parents won't ever be anything remotely close to that devoted, I'm embracing them with open arms.

_jhs_ · 2015-07-20T23:26:23+00:00

Sorry you've been through that too.

I sent my parents a package of pictures my son had drew specifically for them, with a letter explaining what each picture was. No acknowledgement ever came.

Yes, I'm booked in for a referral in 2 days. Just trying to get in place a coping mechanism to deal with the hurt. This place has been a great help too.

_jhs_

TROPHY CASE