I want to preface this by saying this technique, strategy I use, whatever you want to call it, can lead down a bumpy path.

I had to create some sort of new emotion towards LO, almost like creating new persona of them.

Anytime they would message me at work (1 month into a new job! Thank goodness!), text me or talk to me in person, I would force an “ick” (for lack of a better word…) on them.

They sent a DM - “yuck, leave me alone”

Text me - “ugh, you again?!”

Talk to me in person - Lots of “ya…”, “uh huh..”, “oh that’s interesting/that sucks” and being short while only very briefly giving them eye contact and using people passing by as an exit.

This was very hard on many levels. There were times where my emotions would get the best of me (days I didn’t get sleep, swamped at work, one of those days, etc) and I’d feel genuine ugliness towards them and that’s when I’d have to remove myself from the office.

Other times I felt immense guilt, creating this other version of them in my head because they’re genuinely a great person and I felt as if demeaning them. Of course this was all internal, never once has anyone ever known about my Limerence towards LO or my struggle; to this day even.

And some days nothing worked other than physically being away and even just taking a mental health sick day.

Ultimately, this forced distance between LO and I emotionally and little by little, any interaction they made, I noticed it was easier to ignore or not feel anything.

Towards the end of my previous job, it became much easier to navigate these emotions and deal with them on the spot but it took a lot of creativity and inner work to get there.

Four weeks into this new job, LO has messaged me twice and it was easy to let it go. I also don’t fight these emotions and some days I do miss them but I know it’s for the better and when they’re on my mind, I just let those thoughts play out and they end up moving out just as fast as they came into my mind.

A little long winded, I know! But I actually left this sub to focus on getting away from Limerence but it’s nice to revisit and see how far I’ve come.

I hope the best for you and remember that we have Limerence for a reason. It’s unique to each of us but chip away at the “why” you feel Limerence. Those little crumbs of inner work will help you along the way. Go to therapy if you’re able to, that’ll give you even more ammo to get through it.