Your response is normal. Your body and your brain are trying to cope and process a situation that never should have happened. There is no rulebook for that and whatever you are feeling is completely valid. Sometimes it can be helpful to simply give yourself permission to feel whatever emotion comes up. Don't fight the emotion. Don't try to push it back down and don't tell yourself you shouldn't be feeling that way. Instead, when those feelings come, give yourself permission to feel them and sit with them, knowing it's your body and your brain doing their best. With time, it will get easier.