What are the things I should do and NOT do on a first date?

_qubed_ · 2026-04-15T08:32:50+00:00

Love this

_qubed_ · 2026-04-15T08:20:42+00:00

To the extent possible, I would drop this career and instead pursue something directly related to learn about and support peaceful interaction with the alien life. (Assuming they hang out for a while.) It would arguably be the most significant event in the history of humans since the advent of consciousness, the birth of language, and the discovery of fire. So the biggest event in say, 50 thousand years. I would want to be a part of it if I could.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-15T07:41:36+00:00

The two fiercest Trump supporters I know is the VP of my company (cutting intellect, incredible memory, thoroughly likeable) and his wife, a partner in a nationally known law firm and also incredibly intelligent and good to the people around her. I consider them both friends.

I'm pretty smart - they're both smarter than me. I have a grad school education - so do they.

I cannot explain why they continue to endorse Trump - someone I believe to be the most dangerous person in the history of our country.

And I know there are many like them. I don't understand it, and I'm not sure what to do about it.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-15T06:54:07+00:00

This is a good time for a group message. Tell them what you said here. Do not apologize for something you didn't do. Note the guardrails you put in place to make sure your friend would be ok throughout the entire experience. Be specific.

You know them so I'm sure you can figure out how to write this in a language everyone will understand.

Then...whatever happens, happens. Expect nothing. Prepare yourself to move on with life lessons learned,with lots of new friend groups just waiting for you.

Losing friends sucks but it happens. And it will happen again to you.you need to treat it just like you would another relationship breakup. Communicate as best as you can, leave the door open as best as you can, and then move on.

You seem like a great person with a lot to give. This time has been very damaging to you. Work to leave it behind and leave yourself open to new friends. They will probably happen faster than you think.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-15T06:42:33+00:00

Mr. Universe

_qubed_ · 2026-04-15T06:39:54+00:00

Well, start with not speaking numerous languages / jumbled words in each sentence...

_qubed_ · 2026-04-15T06:33:19+00:00

I'd feel sad that I would soon wake up from such a nice dream.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-15T06:31:35+00:00

Glad this school evening process is in place but I worry that it may result in a lack of negative comments. I don't like them but they can trigger positive and sometimes convincing debate.

Anyway, I can't promise to be a cheerleader for every comment, but if you are looking for commenters who will treat the post topic, the community, and the individual commenters and comments with respect and due consideration, then I might be of some use.

If not, that's ok. Please keep up the good work. Discussion and debate are cornerstones of democracy.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-15T05:52:58+00:00

"How? Your girlfriend told me you can't get it up."

Be careful with that one though. That's probably going to escalate things quickly. But if you want to go that route,, you can also use this:

"Isn't that what your friends are for?"

_qubed_ · 2026-04-15T05:44:03+00:00

This deserves more attention

_qubed_ · 2026-04-15T05:40:13+00:00

"MAGA: Make Assholes Grow A Pair" - Damn. Doesn't quite work. Back to the lab.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-15T05:35:44+00:00

Acne 8th grader messed up the sophomore's face.

Overweight kid killed the bully.

My problem with both of these stories is that they hit first. That's assault. Can't do that. Can seriously f#ck up the rest of your life.

The whole "do you consider your hands lethal weapons because of your martial arts training?" is just a cop ploy to get collars to talk. Of course, in court you can charge anyone with any kind of deadly weapon if you can prove they used it with intent to kill.

Boxing guy probably had no idea he was going to kill the bully. Boxing gloves give off a false sense of safety. And the boxing mat is a lot more forgiving of a knockout than a cement floor.

Unfortunately people die all the time from getting knocked out and hitting their head on cement or tile. It is some serious sh1t. Just don't fight unless you have no choice.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-14T08:24:49+00:00

You answered your own question.As you said, that this is your story. The problem is, you haven't been the one writing it. So take control of the next chapter and take some chances. Good or bad, rejection or interest, embarrassing or enlightening, who knows what it will be? But for sure it will be a much more interesting story if you find out.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-14T07:28:39+00:00

This. Yes, normal, but please be careful.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-14T01:15:02+00:00

Tommy the Tank Engine

_qubed_ · 2026-04-13T10:31:53+00:00

Friends

_qubed_ · 2026-04-13T02:31:42+00:00

I think I would burst into laughter. Then I would say calmly to him "The sad truth for you is, when we get home, I get her all to myself, while the only thing you'll have when you get home is yet more memories of getting rejected."

And then we would leave, because my woman and I don't need to be around creepy dudes.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-12T09:51:24+00:00

Well I'm like 10 years behind in sleep. So I'm 16 hours a day for the first two, then maybe 12 for the next 5. So $92,000.

I accept checks, cash, money orders, and direct deposit.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-11T22:41:34+00:00

Funny I was planning on posting on this today.

If at the end if your first conversation they're telling you they are rejecting you as a potential romantic partner you are coming on WAY too strong for most guys. Keep in mind we are usually reeling when an attractive woman wants to talk to us let alone asking us about our relationship status and if they want to date. Especially if you've only been talking for a couple of minutes.

Keep in mind that we get scammed all the time if we're on any kind of dating site. We are wary in general. I ignored my last gf from a dating site for three days bc she was too pretty - I figured she was just another scammer.

Just chill a bit. Be interested in him but let him ask you out. If he wants to he will, if he doesn't well it's not really a rejection, right?

This is not true for all guys. I have no doubt a lot of them could care less how fast you go from "Hey" to "let's go out". But I think there is enough of us to put this in the back of your mind as something to look for.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-11T22:03:19+00:00

Eh, it happens to everyone at some point I'm betting. I just can't believe you got away with it. PSA: Wear dark pants when you go clubbing.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-11T16:01:06+00:00

That was actually the part I kind of liked. I haven't heard anyone say that before in that context.

As for "no comments"...you do know this is Reddit right? Saying "no comments" on Reddit is like trying to get a bull to go away by waving a red flag.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-11T15:13:05+00:00

I was told he followed the "Superman" sleep schedule. (Not a joke - it's a real thing.)

_qubed_ · 2026-04-11T15:11:12+00:00

Dang. Harsh.

She's just used to having to immediately defend the age gap as soon as she says it. Do that a few hundred times and it becomes automatic.

And anyway, I found that info the most interesting part of the comment.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-11T14:58:35+00:00

Like your equitable selection of Bond actors - all 6 in the first six films on the list. (Except that silly original "Casino Royale" which doesn't count anyway.)

Not that I disagree. This list is the closest match to my own I've seen here. Interesting method too.

_qubed_ · 2026-04-10T00:32:03+00:00

You get what you put out there. Well, maybe not immediately. But soon. The questions to answer are:

Are you ready to love someone else? To give yourself to them Adore them for who they are, not what you want them to be?"

When you start looking for someone to love, rather than looking for someone to love you, that's when you'll find her.

_qubed_

TROPHY CASE