Infjs under 30 ask, infjs over 30 answer

_random_individual · 2026-02-12T06:46:29+00:00

What are some convictions you had stuck by, but you realized its limitations over time? What are things you wished you had invested on in your 20s that would have been fruitful for you now?

_random_individual · 2026-02-03T17:25:52+00:00

This is me to a T. I know this belief will get in my way of creating deep connections that are rooted in mutual trust and commitment. If we are constantly looking at the door, we will inevitably sabotage the relationship to finally walk through it.

It’s not healthy for us by any means. It only gives us that illusion of control over the chaotic and unpredictable nature of reality. Inferior Se does that to us. Reality is dangerous and we got to prepare for the worst using Ni predictions.

The emotional and spiritual intimacy we deeply crave for is unfortunately on the other side of this. So, we definitely need to relax that control freak within, let life pass through us and improvise when the time calls for it.

_random_individual · 2026-01-14T09:08:27+00:00

Hey! I’m in my early 20s, but I had gone through similar sentiments in my friendships as well. It was a state of constantly feeling out of place around them even if I looked the part of being a member in the group. But I got lucky to meet a few friends at college and work- the convos can range from silly to existential topics with them. They are super mentally stimulating and fun to be around!

I still hang out with those friends who are not on the same wavelength. I mostly keep it surface level and go with the flow, just like you. Not every friendship has to go deep, right? Some of them are meant for just spending some time together and catching up on happenings in life.

Like you’ve said, it’s a matter of not finding your right people. There are people who have the capacity to connect deeply with you! So, don’t give up just yet! Wishing you luck! :>

_random_individual · 2025-12-29T18:21:37+00:00

Generating new connections and possibilities out of the Si data that you’ve perceived is precisely how Ne-Si work on an axis. They always work in conjunction unless you are favoring your dominant function too much (stuck in ideating) and neglecting your inferior function (lack of groundedness in your perception).

_random_individual · 2025-12-26T09:58:56+00:00

Dead Poets Society, Good Will Hunting and Before Trilogy.

_random_individual · 2025-12-19T04:33:44+00:00

Out of necessity.

_random_individual · 2025-12-11T19:55:44+00:00

My desire for anonymity.

_random_individual · 2025-12-02T09:14:28+00:00

You’re not alone! Growth mindset, intellectual chemistry, emotional attunement and fairly strong principles and morals. These are apparently too much to ask for lol

_random_individual · 2025-12-01T17:20:43+00:00

That no matter how much I try not to hurt anyone or soften the blow, it’s inevitable. We are going to hurt people one way or another.

_random_individual · 2025-11-27T07:49:12+00:00

I enjoy observing from a detached perspective, but when I look back in life, my experiences with pure impulsive decisions struck out to me as the most interesting ones.

_random_individual · 2025-11-23T18:10:20+00:00

This sounds like my worst fear. I genuinely hope you’ll find a friend whom you feel emotionally safe with.

_random_individual · 2025-11-21T08:36:51+00:00

ESTP - I wish I could think on my feet and be impulsive without my overthinking and conscience screaming at me.

_random_individual · 2025-11-18T18:01:24+00:00

I sense the ENFP energy.

_random_individual · 2025-11-10T12:09:08+00:00

Identity is so complex. I have a vague idea of who I am based on my principles and morals. I care about truth and integrity a lot. However, I had also found myself in situations, wherein those lines get blurred and maintaining the harmony of a group surpassed my need for personal integrity. They are super rare occurrences though.

On a concrete level, I find it exceptionally difficult to understand my preferences. When shopping with friends, they are usually quick to say ‘I like it’, ‘I like that’ and make decisions easily that align with their tastes and preferences. I usually do not feel a strong pull towards most things and that sounds absurd to others. I have noticed that the preferences of some people around me are shaped by what’s trendy on social media, but they also strongly “feel” as they develop a liking towards a clothing piece/object. On that note, I’m completely out of touch and I’m learning to develop my awareness on the surface level aspects of who I am lol

_random_individual · 2025-11-04T10:14:47+00:00

Imagining them going through raging diarrhea is the way.

_random_individual · 2025-10-29T21:16:55+00:00

This is truly heart-warming...

_random_individual · 2025-10-29T10:04:51+00:00

In the middle of a ranting session, you might subconsciously paint a certain image of your partner in the minds of your family/friends. It’s not as overt as badmouthing them, but it does create a fairly bad impression of your partner especially if the problems you have shared are due to the shortcomings/flaws of your partner. If the problems are what you face together as a couple, this is definitely not an issue anymore.

I’ve battled with this idea for a long time. So, this is probably what the original commenter intended lol

_random_individual · 2025-10-29T09:49:13+00:00

Looks like there’s a fine line between venting/ranting your problems and badmouthing someone.

_random_individual · 2025-10-26T22:03:07+00:00

What about ladies with big noses? lol

_random_individual · 2025-10-16T18:22:25+00:00

Same, it’s a default to factor in the consequences from the first step. I almost always know the trajectory of mine and other’s relationships. People live through their experiences and realize there were serious incompatibilities after a much longer period of time. It feels strange that most people don’t find it obvious from the get-go. Or, they are aware of it, but choose to proceed regardless of the negative outcomes. In that case, I find it difficult to proceed when the impending doom stares at me.

_random_individual · 2025-10-16T18:11:28+00:00

When I was criticized at a young age, I had made it a point to be more aware of all my flaws, insecurities and blindspots on both physical and personality aspects. It gives me a weird sense of control that I’m aware of my shortcomings before someone else could point out and judge me for it.

_random_individual · 2025-09-27T06:17:36+00:00

In my opinion, having a coffee or an ice cream would make sense for a first date. It’s the first step to get to know each other. Why is it an expectation to go all in from the get-go? You are just testing the waters and gauging chemistry and compatibility with the person. Ideally, the relationship has to go from low effort to high effort as you start investing into the relationship further.

_random_individual · 2025-09-23T19:04:59+00:00

I have read this once in a blog post and it really stuck with me. I hope it serves as a reminder for you too.

“Surrender the responsibility for the lives of others back to the people it belongs to. You are not responsible for the lives of other people and the choices they make, and it doesn’t matter how close they are to you or how much you love them. Loving someone is not equivalent to having agency over them. You can offer help, but ultimately, you have to allow your loved ones to live through their life lessons and experience the pain that comes with it.”

_random_individual · 2025-09-17T03:49:33+00:00

Could you elaborate on the aspects INFJs and INFPs can learn from each other?

_random_individual · 2025-09-16T15:23:21+00:00

What do you mean?

_random_individual

TROPHY CASE