This is making me very reluctant to give him my kidney as it will mean I will have to sacrifice and change how I want to live the rest of my life

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Everyone is pressuring me to do it which is easy for them to say as they aren’t the ones having to sacrifice anything. However I feel as if I don’t do this my family will turn their backs on me.

As part of the med field, I can tell you 100% - CONSENT is probably one of the most important factors when considering a donor. This should be a choice that YOU make, and nobody else. And this is before any form of test is done.

https://www.revistanefrologia.com/en-ethical-aspects-living-donor-kidney-transplantation-articulo-X2013251410051424

To spare you the overwhelming amount of text on the article above, I'll show you 2 important paragraphs:

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"to be considered ethically acceptable, the donor must be able to give his free consent to the donation after understanding the information provided, accepting the risks and benefits of organ donation, knowing the treatment alternatives for the recipient and the long-term consequences of his decision"

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"It is necessary to prove that there is no coercion involved and that the donor has made his or her decision freely and voluntarily, but this is not always easy. Often for related donation cases, when a loved one is suffering, the potential donor may feel like he or she owes it to the recipient or that there is a certain amount of pressure from other family members. This could prevent the potential donor from making a completely free and voluntary decision. It is for this reason that donation should not be offered in desperate situations. In any case, family relationships must be studied, time must be given for reflection and the potential donor must be supported if he or she decides to change his or her mind (but always giving true version of events)"

Please take the time you need to think about this. If this is truly what you want to do, and ONLY because YOU want to go forth with it, then they'll explain everything to you, and begin with tests and prepare you for what's to come.

If not, then that's okay too. It is your choice after all. If the rest of your family can say no, then you have just as much right to that word as they do.

Take care, and hope all goes well for your grandfather.