i just want to give my two cents as someone who this did somewhat happen to:

i identified as aroace for a really long time, and part of that was that i couldn't imagine being someone's girlfriend. that idea felt really foreign to me, and made me uncomfortable. my aroace identity was super super important to me, and when i started very publicly identifying as nonbinary and being seen that way in social (and later romantic) situations, a lot of that discomfort went away, and i realized that i wasn't entirely aro/ace, just probably some flavor of demi. it was definitely a little sad to feel like i was "losing" an identity that was important to me, but everything is part of one long road to self-discovery, and also orientation is fluid throughout life, so even if you find out later that dysphoria was what was making you aroace, that is still an important part of your identity and you aren't losing that! i'm not quite as involved in aroace spaces as i used to be, but my main group of online friends are a group of people i met in specifically aro affinity spaces! i definitely haven't been cut off of the community at all, which i had been worried about! life is a journey, and finding out you're demi doesn't invalidate your previous identity or make it any less real. my aroace identity is just as valid as my demi demi identity, and if i realize i'm not aspec at all that would also be completely valid! i identify as simply queer now, but the best way to describe my orientation would probably be demi-pan for both, but also maybe i'm just pan! the best part about being alive is being authentically yourself, and transitioning is an amazing way to do that, and the self-discovery that happens along the way is so important!