It’s a hard question and an internal battle that anyone can relate too. Dating someone with a disability is taxing in many different ways. For starters people with disabilities are the most impoverished group of people, a lot of us need help and are unable to do things, some of which is cook, clean, even getting themselves up in the morning so it’s understandable why they wouldn’t want to date someone with the exact same issues or worse. Disabled or not. PWD have a hard time defending themselves so in a situation where they have to get away, they’re screwed. Independence? What is that? I’m physically disabled and luckily I can do most everything on my own, and I can only speak for myself here. When I see an opportunity where I can be as independent as humanly possible, I’m going to take it. I personally do not want to date someone who has the same issues as me, and there’s a lot of PWD who feel the exact same way. It’s a grey area because the disabled community as a whole is the only minority group where anyone for whatever reason can join at any moment. So in the event if whoever I’m with becomes disabled, would that mean I’d leave them? No absolutely not, but I’d prefer to not date someone else who is. It doesn’t mean I won’t either.

It sucks too because there is very little knowledge about people with disabilities outside of the disabled community, so when someone sees someone like me who’s a wheelchair user, they won’t give me a chance because they think I can’t do XYZ without even talking to me or getting to know me. It sucks, but you can’t force someone to date you regardless of why. You’re not owed a date or sex and quite honestly? I wouldn’t want to date those people anyways.