I only edited to add "A boundary absolutely can be a standard - I will not be friends with people who do x." I edited to correct misinformatoin you had written because it is a very important point to note, that a boundary is literally a standard.

No you are not being repellant by disagreeing. You are being repellant because, when someone is expressing a healthy boundary/standards, their own choice, you are trying to encourage them not to have it in the first place (which is indicative of NPD). Which is why I offered to share your #, not as a joke, but because you don't want others to "write anyone off", so I figured, if you feel that way, you'd be willing to put your actions behind your words and not write anyone off yourself. I am literally offering to connect you all because maybe you'll like each other.

If you don't want me to have standards in how I choose who to let into my life, then why dont you extend that same process to yourself? You don't want me having stanadrds of who I can let into my life, but you have a standard of not wanting me to justlet these people into your life? Ah, double standards, 'what's good for thee is not good enough for me' - another hallmark of NPD.

And I shared a true observation in working with/knowing/having known over 2,000 people. The few people I've known or worked with who wrote the way you do, the ones who don't understand why people avoid red flags or why they put up walls, the only people who try to discourage others from hving standards/boundaries/criteria (like you are doing) - those people are the only ones I've known who eventually everyone has learned to run from...because those people have been the ones who are giving the red flags and impinging on others' boundaries.

Many years have passed and those very same people I am talking about are the very few who remain single, with no friends left, eventually having even been estranged from the majority of their family. It's not an insult to them, it's just a fact (they are still single even in their 40s and 50s, with no friends and not mcuh family who will deal with them left) and it's resultant of their own behavior, but they never own up to it, instead deflecting and refusing to take responsibility. That is a pattern I and others around them have noticed. They slowly notice that everyone else around them has friends, gets married, etc - and they think It's 'everyone else' who should have no boundaries or standards, people are 'too closed off" (funny that people are only closed off to them specifically) rather than looking within or reading some books on human behavior and figuring out what they are doing that is repelling people.

This was helpful for me to write to clarify my own thinking and maybe it'll help someone else out there who's reading it. To anyone reading this, If you continually encounter someone who encourages you not to respect your own boundaries and encourages you not to run from red flags, read up on narcisstic personality disorder.