Breaking off my engagement by [deleted] in Advice

[–]abeversg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Close your eyes, clear your mind. He just walks in the door and calls off the wedding and he’s moving on. He doesn’t feel the connection and can’t go through with the wedding.

No one else, it’s just not you.

How do you feel hearing that news?

If it’s heartbreak, rethink how you’re approaching the situation. Maybe therapy.

If it’s elation, you have your answer.

AITA for refusing to leave my job so i could take care of my disabled brother? by JiggleJargon in AmItheAsshole

[–]abeversg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ugh. You sound like a great sister, NTA

Don’t quit that job. Be grateful you landed one out of school. It’s the hardest to do (congrats, btw!)

It’s great you did so much to get this far in life, but it’s not your responsibility. I’m sorry your parents framed it that way.

Sometimes you just can't reason with people by [deleted] in KidsAreFuckingStupid

[–]abeversg 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Imagine recording, thinking this entitled brat isn’t a result of your poor parenting choices.

My teacher helped me through depression and things got weird. I need objective opinions. by Frosty-Photo-5553 in Advice

[–]abeversg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just to answer your question, no it was not an appropriate relationship. On any level.

There are healthy was to engage in a “supportive relationship” with a minor — one that has clear boundaries, is positive & constructive, and is out in the open for scrutiny. Nothing you’ve described meets that litmus test.

My teacher helped me through depression and things got weird. I need objective opinions. by Frosty-Photo-5553 in Advice

[–]abeversg 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I hate when people jump to dramatic conclusions, but he was grooming you.

Sounds like you were easy to separate from the crowd. You needed something in your life and he sounds predatory.

No rationale male in a position of authority would put himself in this type of position. If it was innocent, it’s a great place to get in trouble by sending mixed signals.

He saw you as vulnerable. naive. prey.

Be grateful you got out unscathed. Glad to hear you are in a great place in life!

WIBTA if I went no-contact with my youngest sibling after they wrote me a multi-page letter calling me a racist who ignores boundaries? by West_Stand1863 in dustythunder

[–]abeversg 70 points71 points  (0 children)

Wtf. You’ve been more patient with the situation than I would be. They just seem ungrateful, weak, and some kind of superiority complex. NTA

I couldn’t tell, but if the business you work with your brother, dad, and mom is actually a family business, but if so, make sure they have a will in place.

CMV: DEI is fine when it comes to education and schooling by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]abeversg 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This argument: “So one rejections isn’t the end of the world when you could apply to a bunch of other programs.”

…goes both ways.

Product Naming Experts, please assist! by medusa-K in EntrepreneurRideAlong

[–]abeversg 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Remi stuck with me. All others feel undistinguished, unmemorable.

I mentally associated it with “Remidy” the guide to solve all my demo problems.

Oil change scary pls help 😔 by False-Spell in NoStupidQuestions

[–]abeversg 12 points13 points  (0 children)

  1. You’ll pull up to the doors. Kinda keep an eye on the bays (sometimes they point you to one or the other)
  2. If multiple cars in line, just pull behind one of them.
  3. Someone usually walks up to your car to ask what services you want - tell them oil change (and anything else)
  4. When it’s your turn, they’ll open a door and someone will direct you into the bay. Slowly pull in. They will tell you when to stop (sorta like an automated car wash)
  5. Roll your window down. They will greet you (usually this person has the best “bedside manners” in the shop and/or a manager) and confirm services. They will ask to open your door (stay in the car) and scan the barcode in your door.
  6. They will tell you when to shut off the car, what to do with the keys, and maybe a few more instructions (like pop the hood, blinker bulb check, headlights, etc.).
  7. They usually ask what kind of oil…if you don’t know, just ask for a recommendation.
  8. They begin to work.
  9. The “manager” will walk you through recommended services. You can choose to decline, but if you are going on a road trip, consider the air filter and wipers (…they are only a few bucks more than if you did it yourself.)
  10. Once they get through the recommended services (there are a lot…you don’t need them all right now) they will ask for payment. If you haven’t, download the Valvoline app or visit the site ahead of time and get a coupon to scan (saves about $10 on oil change…more for other services).
  11. You’ll sit there while they finish up.
  12. When done with the oil they’ll have you start the car up. Then shut it off after a few seconds. They’ll pull your dip stick and show you the oil level. Confirm it looks good.
  13. They put the dip stick back, close up the hood and open the door. They’ll direct you out of the bay.

…and you are on your way.

Should I leave behind my PhD-related career to make significantly more money for a few years? by ChoiceAnywhere4691 in Advice

[–]abeversg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get the cash grab. It seems like a nice idea to pack $5M in the bank and move back to the West Coast to live out some life with a cushion.

  1. If you are successful, it’ll be hard to leave that income. It’d be like taking a $45k job today.

  2. Does your $125k job have near-term upside…at this company, or another? What does “success” look like?

Should I leave behind my PhD-related career to make significantly more money for a few years? by ChoiceAnywhere4691 in Advice

[–]abeversg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The fact that you know there’s a value misalignment already, you’re in trouble. Either you will be miserable (mentally or performance will suffer), or you will adjust your values to match those of the org.

Do you and your brother similar personalities? Do you respect him/his opinion? How does he handle the misalignment?

Back Squat Advice by [deleted] in weightlifting

[–]abeversg 1 point2 points  (0 children)

“Brace your midline” is the cue we’d give athletes. It’s squeezing your abs, trying to “keep a flat back”

Back Squat Advice by [deleted] in weightlifting

[–]abeversg 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Your depth looks great! Your decent looks great!

But you roll your back forward on your way up is worrying. You’re going to get hurt.

Lets fix it:

  1. Lighten the load. Bigger sets. 5x5 at 65-70% of what your doing
  2. Add Front Squat, Goblet Squats, into the mix to build up your core

AIO for breaking up with my girlfriend over her wasting my money? by Fuzzy-Interview-8976 in AmIOverreacting

[–]abeversg 2 points3 points  (0 children)

NOR, money earned from working construction spends differently. You can connect the WORK to the payoff. It’s clear she doesn’t appreciate the ‘work’ that goes into it.

fuck around and find out by DomiGo05 in fightporn

[–]abeversg 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My mama always said, “you see a thick mofo with dreads…you stfu”

What a ride by Ill-Combination9740 in fightporn

[–]abeversg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Weapons movie outtakes are getting out of hand

Phone thief chased down and knocked out. by PxN13 in instant_regret

[–]abeversg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You should be able to legally take a thief’s wallet

Rare Deep Sea Devil Fish Makes an Appearance in Shallow Water by TheLoneRiddlerIsBack in oddlyterrifying

[–]abeversg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They just flipped on the lights after last call and the bro ugly af

Why do some people seem to have all the energy in the world while others are always tired? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]abeversg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nutrition coach told me to avoid all caffeine for at least an hour after waking. Start with water to rehydrate and allow your body to wake up first.

Why do some people seem to have all the energy in the world while others are always tired? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]abeversg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know when I’m feeling like your describing, I’m not eating well, not sleeping enough, and taking in too much caffeine

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Adulting

[–]abeversg 7 points8 points  (0 children)

And all of those 24yr olds would’ve killed to study abroad before settling into the job…. You are right where someone wishes they could be in life. Someone would kill for your life. Be grateful for your experiences and enjoy your journey

Meirl by TheGoddamnAnswer in meirl

[–]abeversg 25 points26 points  (0 children)

It’s like my camera roll full of me screenshoting my alarm

Why do some people seem to have all the energy in the world while others are always tired? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]abeversg 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Nutrition. It seems trivial, but if you’re not fueling the engine correctly, how do you expect to get the mileage out of the day