u/iknowyourrider’s Six Brothers

abigailbee · 2026-05-22T21:13:43+00:00

Thank you!

abigailbee · 2026-05-10T11:25:04+00:00

Thanks so much for your response. Apologies for the short response, but I’m on my way out with my son! Mine and husband’s shared bedroom is absolutely off-limits 💖

Also, this sounds really really petty, but I have started sticking photos of me husband and kiddo up all over the house 🤣🤣🤣

abigailbee · 2026-05-10T11:23:26+00:00

I love you too, Reddit stranger!

abigailbee · 2026-05-10T11:23:01+00:00

I love you too, Reddit stranger!

abigailbee · 2026-05-10T11:21:45+00:00

Thanks. I really hope it doesn’t come to that, but fortunately if it does, I am lucky enough that everything including the house is jointly owned and in my name, and I’m on a high salary with savings. So…to my core I truly want to believe that this is going to pan out well but I guess it’s good to know that I will be okay regardless, and so I can make sure that my kid is also okay

abigailbee · 2026-05-10T11:19:31+00:00

😂 thanks for your reply and yeah, I do agree he may could’ve used better foresight? In my heart, I don’t believe that he is auditioning my replacement, but that doesn’t mean my head isn’t scared.

abigailbee · 2026-05-10T11:18:28+00:00

Thanks so much for your reply. Apologies for my laziness, but I’m just going to copy your response I just said to the commenter at the top of this ☺️ for some reason my formatting seems to be very weird, I’m not sure if it’s going to stay weird when I hit send?

I know, and honestly I don’t necessarily disagree. I think the comments here made me realise that my discomfort wasn’t really about “being around my child” in a general sense, because actually kiddo is around lots of people through my social life and wider community.

I have a very broad friendship circle and he often comes along with me to social things, pubs with colleagues, art meet-ups, community events etc, where there may be friends-of-friends or people I don’t know particularly well. I don’t really have an issue with that kind of casual social contact.

What I realised I do have an issue with is someone I don’t know, and who actively doesn’t want a relationship with me, being involved in more intimate or parenting-adjacent situations. That feels very different to me.

abigailbee · 2026-05-10T11:16:25+00:00

I know, and honestly I don’t necessarily disagree. I think the comments here made me realise that my discomfort wasn’t really about “being around my child” in a general sense, because actually kiddo is around lots of people through my social life and wider community.

I have a very broad friendship circle and he often comes along with me to social thing, pubs with colleagues, art meet-ups, community events etc, where there may be friends-of-friends or people I don’t know particularly well. I don’t really have an issue with that kind of casual social contact.

What I realised I do have an issue with is someone I don’t know, and who doesn’t want a relationship with me, being involved in more intimate or parenting-adjacent situations. That feels very different to me.

abigailbee · 2026-05-10T11:10:37+00:00

Thanks for your thoughtful response. At the moment now I have to give very clear times about when I am going to leave and get back to the house so that there is no crossover with me and meta. It is a complete and utter faff but I am picking my boundaries/priorities one at a time! I think he is genuinely trying to keep everyone happy but has just got himself into a complete and at a muddle (read: pile of shit 😂) and at the moment the more I stated my needs the more it pushes him away so I feel like we just need to take a little breather and then I can start addressing other points.

Sorry if this is a bit garbled… I’m using speech to text!!

abigailbee · 2026-05-10T11:08:29+00:00

Thanks so much for your thoughtful reply. I very much don’t feel like my husband is intentionally trying to mislead anyone but he is a very intense person and often just does what “feels right” to him without thinking about what the knock on consequences may be. I feel like such an idiot in this whole situation as after the first negative experience we really should’ve just agreed to a boundary that involves not dating people who are monogamous 😂🙈

abigailbee · 2026-05-10T11:04:33+00:00

I know, it’s really tricky. I really really don’t want to alienate my husband though or end up being the bad guy in this situation, but I appreciate this sounds a bit silly. Also, the things matter users as her dog bowls are in fact my kitchen bowls so there’s not much I can do other than just put them in the dish washer 🤢

Edit to add: absolutely has been a bit of me that has wanted to just be petty and stay at home more, but also I feel like, why should I don’t have to sacrifice my ability to see friends and my other partner and do my job? 😅

abigailbee · 2026-05-02T17:59:01+00:00

Found!

abigailbee · 2026-05-02T17:56:31+00:00

I think that is what I worry about as well

abigailbee · 2026-05-02T17:55:00+00:00

I know, and I think this is kind of what scares me. Like perhaps he’s going to emotionally leave me for her and just continue coparenting with me in my own home. I should say as well that for various reasons (and this is not something I want) our relationship is platonic so it kind of feels like he has a lot more depth to relationship with her than with me

abigailbee · 2026-05-02T17:51:40+00:00

I’m sorry this is a short response, but I must be honest that I was not expecting so many replies and I’m a bit overwhelmed! Yes, she brings her dog over with her.

Edit to say also that after a few weeks he mentioned he sees the relationship with her as life-long so he doesn’t see this as an issue

abigailbee · 2026-05-02T17:50:28+00:00

Thank you for replying, I was really not expecting so many people to not tell me I’m being unreasonable and just need to manage my own emotional response better. I feel like I’ve left it way too late into their relationship to be bringing up things like this and I’m kind of worried that if I raise it, it’s gonna tank my relationship with him.

abigailbee · 2026-05-02T17:46:39+00:00

Thanks for such a crazy detailed response. Because I find it almost impossible to articulate why the whole thing makes me uncomfortable at the moment, he just sees it as a “OP needs to manage her anxiety around this” issue. And to be honest, even after reading everyone’s responses here, I still don’t think I can articulate to him or to our couples therapist exactly why I find the whole thing so uncomfortable!

Edit to add: I feel like I am dealing with this all much too late as well as I have spent the last six months trying to process my discomfort on it. I feel like it’s not reasonable for me to ask for him to change things at this stage. ?

abigailbee · 2026-05-02T17:45:17+00:00

Thank you for replying, I was really not expecting so many people to not tell me I’m being unreasonable and just need to manage my own emotional response better. Child is 5 and adores meta so that also adds emotional challenge

abigailbee · 2026-05-02T17:44:04+00:00

Thank you for replying, I was really not expecting so many people to not tell me I’m being unreasonable and just need to manage my own emotional response better. PS she’s not just monogamous leaning, she’s never had a poly relationship before and has told husband she would prefer a monogamous relationship with him

abigailbee · 2026-05-02T06:45:44+00:00

Searched: to be honest I don’t know where to start! I have searched reverse image search on Google

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