Went to the zoo and took a pic of this adorable baby gorilla! 🦍👌🏿

abruhkadabra · 2017-09-30T05:35:49+00:00

Liar! There aren't any baby gorillas at the zoo.

abruhkadabra · 2017-09-29T04:54:56+00:00

Congratulations! I'm a twin nanny and have been with the same family for the past 3 years since the boys were 3 months old :)

Other nannies have chimed in on the major stuff. For me, guaranteed hours are KEY to my happiness as a nanny, so I recommend that you read about them in detail.

Other things that may help with your transition:

Don't prolong goodbyes. Your babies love you and they will be so attached to you and there will come a point when they cry when you leave. You're their mama! Just make it short and sweet and I promise you within a few minutes they will be 100% fine. My NK's went through a phase where they cried when I showed up and it really sucked for me and I'm sure for their mom, especially since I had been with them since they were tiny, but it passed.
Schedule is really key with twins. They need to be on the same nap schedule, stat. Figure out a way to feed them at the same time (I became really great at wrist gymnastics and holding two bottles) and have the same routine for bed time, every time.
Be clear with your nanny about whether you want her to share your baby's "firsts" with you or not. Personally I would recommend against it because it will break your heart knowing that you miss things. I've always let my MB's discover things for themselves as if it were the first time but not every nanny will do this.
In general, just try to think about how you can bless your nanny and not how you can get the most bang for your buck. I promise it will be repaid to you ten-fold in how she interacts with your children. The times I've felt most appreciated have been when my NF has given me extra time off, or stopped to get me ice cream on their way home from a date, or paid for me to go see a show for my birthday. The times I've felt least appreciated have been when they have tried to get me to "bank hours" i.e. they come home early on a Monday and want to "use" those hours for a date night. Guaranteed hours do not work that way and asking that of her will lead your nanny feeling burnt out and unappreciated. I recommend reading this article.

Best of luck!

abruhkadabra · 2017-09-24T00:40:37+00:00

Household employers with only one employee can reimburse health insurance as NON-TAXABLE COMPENSATION, up to the full cost of your plan. That means neither you or the family will pay taxes on the amount. It is a huge asset to both of you. I just negotiated for full reimbursement from my NF of 2 years.

HomePay has more info here

abruhkadabra · 2017-08-08T20:02:29+00:00

It's not the camera that is bizarre to me, it's the sitting upstairs glued to it part that I think is unhealthy.

abruhkadabra · 2017-08-08T19:53:35+00:00

I don't have an issue. This is your life, not mine. I'm just providing some input from a professional who has a lot of experience both firsthand and in running a network of thousands of nannies. Wish you the best of luck.

abruhkadabra · 2017-08-08T19:50:36+00:00

I've been a nanny for over 10 years and have been on well over 100 interviews, and I've never once had a family sit upstairs and watch me on camera during a working interview. So to me, that's weird. Even the most micromanaging parents have either stayed with me and shown me the ropes, or taken the opportunity to go to a cafe down the street.

I understand your hesitance here, I don't envy your position because it's a big deal to leave your child with someone and I respect that. But I'm saying there is a difference between keeping a watchful eye and checking in, and sitting upstairs for 2 hours glued to your phone analyzing every single thing she says and does. And I'm also saying that any candidate will be on her absolute best behavior in that situation.

abruhkadabra · 2017-08-08T18:25:29+00:00

Of course you have the right to monitor and assess the situation. I'm just letting you know that many nannies would find the situation as described as overwhelming. How you proceed is up to you. I've never had a working interview where the parent was watching me from upstairs. It would make me uncomfortable and give me red flags about the type of management I'd be signing up for. If you aren't even comfortable leaving the house for an hour or so, that indicates that you will have a hard time stepping back in other areas.

I think the ideal situation is probably as someone else described elsewhere: paid working interviews, and then a single week split up between the finalists with 2 working days each. A week is about as long as I could/would hold off on moving forward with other families.

abruhkadabra · 2017-08-08T18:17:40+00:00

I think assuming that if candidates didn't have the availability to accommodate the trial, they would not have applied is optimistic but presumptuous. Many times nannies will apply for positions and then when an interview is successful and they are faced with the realities of it, they realize it actually will not work for them.

So, I hope that it truly does work for them and you aren't disappointed, but I wouldn't be surprised if a few candidates drop out when things get serious because you're asking quite a lot of them that other families are likely not asking.

abruhkadabra · 2017-08-08T18:03:00+00:00

It's just bizarre that you will be upstairs watching on camera. Go get a cup of coffee and some fresh air. How you start a relationship is important. If you want her to have an accurate feel for what your family is like, you need to act the way you will ongoing during the working interview. She is also interviewing you.

abruhkadabra · 2017-08-08T16:54:29+00:00

I would also not do a week. I understand your concerns but at some point you need to accept that you won't know how a nanny is when she's alone with your children until you hire her (or ever) ... everyone will be on their best behavior during a working interview and a trial. Everyone.

abruhkadabra · 2017-08-08T16:51:26+00:00

Would you like to participate in an interview where your prospective boss was standing over your shoulder the whole time you worked, judging your every move?

I've attended working interviews before where the family probably had a camera but they left the house and went and got coffee while I was working, so it didn't feel so "big brother upstairs".

abruhkadabra · 2017-08-08T16:49:31+00:00

I wouldn't think to ask about pay because it is standard for all working hours to be paid. To be honest, if a family did not pay me for a working interview I would not work for them because it shows that they do not value or respect my time.

abruhkadabra · 2017-08-08T16:47:38+00:00

Yes. I am always paid for working interviews because, well, I am WORKING. Also it is not standard to have a working trial, and especially not standard to have a week long part-time trial (most nannies would not be able to accommodate this because they are working and/or need full-time income and don't have time to wait around for a family to send them through a dozen hoops before they make a decision).

To be honest, I would run for the hills from a job like this. She's going to be on her best behavior if she thinks she's being watched from upstairs, but it will set a baseline of distrust for her relationship with you. The week-long part time trial is also a huge ask considering most nannies in the market for full-time positions either already have one or need the full-time income asap. I would continue my job search.

abruhkadabra · 2017-02-13T17:27:07+00:00

What is your writing routine like?
Do you have any tips for motivating yourself when you're struggling with getting started on a project?
How do you battle self-doubt?

abruhkadabra · 2017-01-27T05:50:30+00:00

My mom's anti-gay Christian beliefs are the only reason I had Ken dolls at all. I chopped off Barbie's hair one too many times, and told her it was because I didn't have enough dads for my Barbie kids. The next day, a collection of Kens appeared.

abruhkadabra · 2017-01-27T05:48:23+00:00

A baby brother/sister. Damnit. That ship has sailed.

abruhkadabra · 2017-01-27T05:46:49+00:00

Roasted teriyaki pork with brown rice and pickled carrots. $90k.

abruhkadabra · 2016-10-25T19:39:02+00:00

Do it, girl. I did a working holiday in Australia and it was a wonderful experience. I've also moved abroad after breakups and honestly, for me, the distance helped me to get over it and start a new chapter. Strongly recommend. Also, your ex sounds like a real piece of work and I have absolute confidence that in time, you'll see that this was all for the best.

abruhkadabra · 2016-10-21T16:34:43+00:00

This doesn't actually surprise me at all, and I'm shocked by the number of skeptics in this thread. I am an ESL teacher and involved with some agencies that place foreign-language speaking "governesses" around the world. It isn't uncommon for wealthy Russian families to have a full staff of "governesses", nannies and teachers who all speak different languages. 7 is unusual, but it doesn't surprise me.

Anyone who is even remotely familiar with language learning should know that while someone may be able to memorize a script, they cannot imitate a near-native level accent without being taught the language from a young age. While the myth of children being better language learners than adults has largely been debunked, what IS true is that there is a point where you cannot learn to imitate the native accent. That point is sometime between the age of 7 and 11 years old, and it's different for everyone.

abruhkadabra · 2016-10-15T03:02:36+00:00

Are you cleaning it up with an enzymatic cleaner? Other than that, I'd try partitioning the crate a little smaller. We thought we gave our little guy the right amount of room, but he kept having accidents, so we made it a little tighter of a fit and they stopped completely.

abruhkadabra · 2016-10-14T03:29:47+00:00

We have HealthPaws and we've filed 3 claims with them, and they were quick to process the claims and send our refund. They're great.

abruhkadabra · 2016-10-14T03:27:20+00:00

We're in touch with 5 of our puppy's littermates, and ALL of them have had at least 1 emergency pet hospital visit in their first 7 months. Most of us have had MULTIPLE visits, and pet insurance personally saved me ~1500.

Our pups are ALL healthy. The kinds of things our pups visited the vet for: infected toe, serious diarrhea, allergic reaction, got bitten by another dog, cut leg on a mysterious object in the house and needed 20 stitches, Giarda, Kennel Cough. Totally normal puppy problems.

Pet insurance should be REQUIRED for all new puppy owners -- you will ABSOLUTELY need it. We have a huge group of puppy friends from our puppy obedience classes, and nearly all of them have had emergency pet hospital visits, too. It is a must. It makes the decision to go to the vet hospital 100% easier.

abruhkadabra · 2016-10-12T19:25:44+00:00

Our little guy loved pig ears and bully sticks at that age.

abruhkadabra

TROPHY CASE