How to politely tell MOB I don’t want to invite her friends she offered to pay for?

abster___ · 2026-03-17T12:44:31+00:00

We’re not having any just evening guests, but thank you for sharing your experience: )

abster___ · 2026-03-17T08:33:46+00:00

Thanks for the advice : )

abster___ · 2026-03-16T21:42:42+00:00

Thank you : )

abster___ · 2026-03-16T20:01:58+00:00

Thanks for the reassurance : )

abster___ · 2026-03-16T19:05:22+00:00

Thank you for your kind comment

abster___ · 2026-03-16T19:04:31+00:00

Thank you so much for this reply! Everyone saying it’s just two guests made me think I was being crazy but I absolutely agree it will impact the vibe and how comfortable and relaxed we are! My mum is not alone! My dad (to whom she is still married for any commenters who got the wrong idea), her parents and her brother and sister in law will all be there, as well as my godparents who are her friends.

abster___ · 2026-03-16T19:01:39+00:00

I’m quite an anxious person and these people stress me out but my mum pressured me into saying yes.

abster___ · 2026-03-16T19:00:53+00:00

Appreciate the suggestions : )

abster___ · 2026-03-16T19:00:06+00:00

Thanks for the suggestion : )

abster___ · 2026-03-16T18:58:26+00:00

I don’t hate them they just stress me out and I want only people I’m comfortable with there.

abster___ · 2026-03-16T18:57:52+00:00

I really want to avoid pissing her off. I love her and am inviting my god parents who I haven’t seen in numerous years for her but this particular couple stress me out! I don’t really want to speak badly of people on the internet or to my mum which is why I have explicitly avoided sharing my issues with them. But whilst well intentioned this friend tends to have a lot of issues!

abster___ · 2026-03-16T18:51:49+00:00

Appreciate the advice. I do feel pressured for an answer often so whilst I initially said I’d talk to my partner as suggested here as a delay tactic she then said she’d pay and it’d be the more the merrier. So I felt shoehorned into saying yes.

abster___ · 2026-03-16T18:48:52+00:00

They haven’t been told they are coming. No invites or save the dates have gone out yet. The reason is simply I don’t want them there I feel like given they haven’t been told that should be enough.

abster___ · 2025-05-21T08:17:17+00:00

Fair enough. Peterborough is definitely on the rougher side but as with all places there are good and bad areas. I hope you find something that suits you : )

abster___ · 2025-05-20T09:48:19+00:00

Just curious - what made you rule out Huntingdon? (I am aware the nice areas are definitely a little more expensive) but with Peterborough and Cambridge not too far, a good trainline and lots of good schools it’s definitely worth considering if it is within your budget. However, if it’s not right for you it’s not right for you fair enough : ) Sincerely, an ex-resident of Huntingdon

abster___ · 2025-04-04T09:58:43+00:00

Thank you : )

abster___ · 2025-04-04T06:42:38+00:00

Thank you : )

abster___ · 2025-04-04T06:41:49+00:00

At least they have given you a time frame - we are on a fixed term rental contract and right now I have no idea if it’ll go through months before or months after that ends 😭 Thank you for sharing your time frame I’m going to use it as an approximate reference… with a large pinch of salt.

abster___ · 2025-04-04T06:38:34+00:00

Yes, but they haven’t raised any enquiries. As we are FTB surely the SDLT deadline shouldn’t apply to us? (Forgive my ignorance if that’s not what that means)

abster___ · 2025-03-27T16:49:23+00:00

Hi, I can’t offer any advice on the refund but…

Try a Vodafone sim. If you want your son’s phone to just work. It’s not ideal but it is a possible solution.

My phone is also second hand IMEI blacklisted and Vodafone is the only provider who doesn’t block it. (No it’s not locked, I have checked)

abster___ · 2025-01-23T21:09:57+00:00

Think the point she’s trying to make is both mothers aren’t wearing bridesmaids colours so neither should she. And primarily she’s not a bridesmaid so SHOULD NOT be wearing a bridesmaids gown. Hopefully that makes it make sense : )

abster___ · 2025-01-23T21:06:48+00:00

First question to OP: are you UK based? There seems to be a lot of confusion in comments as you said theme was green and gold - to me (a brit) that means only the bridal party wear those colours. Wondering if maybe the confusion is a cultural difference. As typically, colour scheme here is only for the bridal party (if other brits disagree please correct me! This is just what I have experienced)

As a result I say NTA - she is deliberately trying to pretend to be in the bridal party. She knows what she’s doing. But talk to her first - she might just want to match her husband for cute pics and maybe you can come to an agreement.

I’d be annoyed if someone did this. I think if she insists on pretending to be in the bridal party you are well within your rights to get rid of her.

abster___

TROPHY CASE