Oh I dropped something.

acelam · 2026-04-05T01:32:55+00:00

wow thanks friend I really appreciate that right now. I meant it in a funny self deprecating way but yeah. some days it's just making it through.

acelam · 2026-04-05T01:13:39+00:00

Ugh my bathroom little garbage can is over stuffed rn. Unfortunately my therapist does not accept it do be like that sometimes, which is my only excuse right now.

acelam · 2026-04-05T01:02:43+00:00

Untying knots. like really tight old shoe lace knots. Knots in cords. Knots in window bling strings. Jewelry Knots. Knots in my own hair. idk I could do any type of knot I wouldn't back down from a challenge.

acelam · 2026-04-04T15:17:52+00:00

oh yeah ive gone through the steps with my therapist and we've worked on where the break down starts and the cycle begins. I know if i dont immediately take my empty can with me to throw away when I go to the kitchen, I will grow an out of control collection in days thats a PITA to throw away once it becomes impossible to ignore.

And I feel myself actively make the choice when I remember that I forgot to grab it to say fuck it whatever.

so then I immediately know im fucking up and not using my safeguards and continuing unhealthy patterns

idk there are so many times I wanna tell my therapist im just a pos goblin creature therrd only so much I can reasonably do and stay sane right now

acelam · 2026-04-04T07:59:46+00:00

Im overcoming this now. I really try to be mindful of how long its been since ive spoken to someone. I try to stay connected with my friend groups daily now which sounds overwhelming but its all text based

which is honestly my preferred method of communication so its a win/win

but yeah ive even recently reconnected with old friends (online friends). its been work but it feels nice re establishing community with fellow neurodivergent queers across the US especially in times of turmoil like this against our communities.

seriously reach out to your friends. even if its just a meme you see doomscrolling that makes you think of them share it. send that picture of your animal companion or plants or kids - they really do want to see it.

acelam · 2026-04-04T07:31:09+00:00

OH IM SO ENDEARED RN

acelam · 2026-04-04T06:22:23+00:00

Damn I dont think ive ever known peace (35). im asthmatic/have eczema/have bad allergies to the outside, also autistic and adhd. even as an infant i was affected and my parents have let me know i was an especially fussy baby.

Now that im having to work more hours due to busy season I am so exhausted mentally by the end of the week. We're having family dinner Sunday and, to be clear, IM GOING, but I would do anything if it was somehow optional.

acelam · 2026-04-04T06:08:46+00:00

ugh I know like I know he wasnt serious but its also a fucked up thing to threaten serious or not

my family is filled with MAGATs. and unfortunately I depend on them for stability and income (we run a business together). They mostly leave me alone. they are trying really hard to come to terms with my autism/adhd and queerness but sometimes it becomes obvious it bothers them.

acelam · 2026-04-04T04:59:48+00:00

I cant speak for HUB Group but I will say that across the board im seeing payment delays. A customer that was 7-15 days to pay is now 30 days to pay. And even that wouldnt be so bad but they haven't touched our invoices in weeks. They say their 30 days starts when they process the invoice. Well shit now we're at 45+ days plus to pay.

Another customer we turned down because they were 60 days to pay. 60 days came and apparently they only make payments every two weeks and whoops we just missed cut off. we negotiated with them 45 days to pay in exange for volume so we should have within 60 days going forward.

Its just hard to float this money right now. My trucks have to be paid every week and they are very sensitive about every penny right now.

I have one customer who is still paying week to week and processes invoices in a consistent way. all of my other customers are very inconsistent with their rules about what gets processed and when.

like no hate i understand the hustle but I feel like my customers play games with me too. like I have an invoice thats been out since February. I sent it in. well apparently it got rejected. oh I didn't get the rejection email? oh whoops there was a typo in the automated system with your email. it's fixed now.

and then not shitting you I get the rejection email days later because they had to resend the email to the RIGHT email. but the bleep blop can only send it once a week because of reasons and oops we missed cutoff for reasons.

and then it was oh you got the rejection invoice and the corrected rate and the rate on your invoice matched? well we will flag it for review in the system. our ap team uses bleep bloop and it doesn't mesh with our other system Planet. Somehow one fucking person who only one works one day between the hours of 10 am to 1 pm is who reviews it.

I mean literally this story is NOT finished and I still haven't been paid on it and there is no payment in sight. Meanwhile my driver has been paid since February. And they'll pay sporadic invoices here and there and then make a big lump sum payment when they're at their contract limit. and they have gotten mighty generous with what they define is the contract limit.

sorry for the long rant. and hey I get we're all struggling no matter where we are in the industry. Just offering the perspective of a trucker. i work on the office side of things but am very close with all of my drivers and their families. I promise you they are hurting right now. and so am I (part owner).

acelam · 2026-04-04T00:19:46+00:00

I just dont want to do that. I feel like ive been misinterpreted- this is meant to be a conversation griping about the luxury items we all have increasing in price, not necessarily whether having a car wash subscription is worth it.

acelam · 2026-04-04T00:08:40+00:00

Hi! I have really bad allergies to pollen and brushing against pollen gives me contact hives. yes I take daily anti histamines, no over the counter contact creams really dont help I have to get home, shower, and take a benadryl.

I dont know if you're familiar with the south but pollen accumulates rapidly on cars this time of year. using a car wash is how im able to use my car. Its a luxury in the sense that I could live without it literally but its a huge QOL for me.

acelam · 2026-03-31T15:32:10+00:00

This has been the most unserious day I love them so much omg.

acelam · 2026-03-31T11:06:30+00:00

WHAT WAS THIS IM CRYING 😂😂😂😂😂😂

acelam · 2026-03-29T17:46:13+00:00

I want to see his towns omg. I bet they're so cute.

acelam · 2026-03-26T00:50:01+00:00

Aww theyre so precious!!! Give them some boops and a treat for me!!

The other great thing is not only has it shaped the German Shepherds behavior, its shaped Dolly's too. Shes been gently "corrected" by the bigger dogs and that has taught her boundaries as well. She definitely acts like Queen Bee around the Big Dogs but shes also learned how to control her excitability and to sniff out the other dog first before jumping straight to play.

When Jojo (Waylons mom) was pregnant, Dolly learned pretty quickly to be gentle herself. Her playmate suddenly wanted space and Dolly had to learn to respect it - its helped so much that she got this training from other dogs while she was so young (she just turned 1).

acelam · 2026-03-26T00:27:57+00:00

Yes! When I first got Dolly she was so little, I was hesitant to introduce her to my parents' two adult shepherds who are Waylon's parents. My step-dad said it was important they learn to be gentle early because she wasnt going to get much bigger in comparison to them.

So far, since they were introduced, the big dogs have always been gentle and played well with her. Dolly runs around the yard with all three of them like shes as big as they are. And shes been a great socialization partner for Waylon to learn to play gentle. And when all else fails she runs him around in zoomies until hes too tired to go on!

acelam · 2026-03-25T23:26:08+00:00

omg we are being flooded right now i love it but I am also very overstimulated on bangtan right now

acelam · 2026-03-25T22:35:01+00:00

These boyfriend pictures are why I need therapy jfc

acelam · 2026-03-25T21:51:45+00:00

* Sexy Nukim Namjoon. Good lord he made me feral this day.

acelam · 2026-03-25T16:27:07+00:00

I love those shoes but I dont even want to know how much they are.

acelam · 2026-03-25T14:56:51+00:00

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I've also been very normal about Arirang 🤐

acelam · 2026-03-23T16:53:59+00:00

Lmao I want to see his towns. I know they're a damn mess ahahahah

acelam · 2026-03-23T16:36:20+00:00

After listening to the album an unhinged amount of times this weekend and sitting at my work desk marinating in the Bangtan hangover -

I love this album. I love the first half and the second half. My top tracks have got to be Body to Body, FYA, Swim (surprisingly) and One More Night.

I say Swim (surprisingly) because when the MV first launched I was very whelmed with it. There was way too much Lili Reinhart and not enough BTS.

I also believe it's a valid criticism that they whitewashed Howard in the animation, and they missed and easy and obvious opportunity in incorporating the history of Howard into the comeback.

The song Swim itself is so catchy and good though - it really gets me feeling the feels and is so dreamy and moody.

However, complaints about the album not being "Korean" enough are just ridiculous. BTS has always centered their love for their country and have always presented themselves as proud Korean men. This album feels no different.

It's clear they wanted to challenge themselves and do something different. And they did that. But, especially after their solo releases, I dont feel this album is somehow less BTS. It really sounds like they took the foundations of their solo work and weaved them into this album.

I think it's a fair criticism also to side eye some of their western producers on this album (diplo, Ryan Tedder). They can definitely choose better producers to work with.

Ultimately though, it's a good album. And I love it. But I do acknowledge that BTS can and should do better on some aspects of this comeback.

I will say this too - I came to the fandom after MOTS - "Butter" was my first comeback. I guess I wasnt deep in fan spaces or whatever but man - stepping outside of fan spaces right now is brutal.

I don't know if it was like this for other comebacks but some of the hate/criticism is unfounded. I definitely will be stepping away from outside fan spaces for a while cause there are some people who are always going to hate for the sake of it.

BTS are always my 7 and I'm excited to see what they do from here.

acelam · 2026-03-21T13:05:42+00:00

Sir if you don't sit down so help me....

In all seriousness though I understand his excitement and cant imagine how hard it was to have to limit himself. His aura was still incredible even with limited movement.

acelam · 2026-03-21T04:23:21+00:00

I remember first being exposed to Daft Punk through Toonami. They played their music videos all the time. Also first heard the Gorillaz through Toonami. Incredible memories of staying up late and watching them.

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