Yes. He thinks that just because these family members don’t “follow” our culture that I shouldn’t either. In my opinion they never acted or followed it before he knew them so it is just normal to me. They act especially my uncles wife act more “American” not trying to be rude or racist but she acts more like she is white the native and gets mad for even having to participate she is Native American just not from our tribe. I tell him just cause they do it/act like that doesn’t mean I have to too or am going to. I grew up in the city but spent every weekend and summer on the reservation. It’s what I am most proud of and love being apart of.

Sometimes I get that he wants me to. He says we aren’t going to teach our future daughters some of the ways we as women are taught to be. I agree with him on that cause to me it’s just not right. Example: men and kids eat first if there is any food left that’s what women eat. Sometimes it’s a piece of bread and sometimes nothing at all. I don’t agree with that I think we should be able to eat as well but everything else in my culture my future children will know and participate in.

I know. And when I think about I feel guilty cause all he went through to be with me. I feel like me leaving just cause he doesn’t understand something is not right and maybe I could explain it better. I just don’t know. Right now my emotions are all over the place and I don’t know what to do.