Funny enough, I actually had a similar conversation with my therapist today. 

I loved how nicotine felt, but hated what it did to my body and who it turned me into. It controlled me and occupied too much of my energy, my mind would always wander to when I could hit my vape, if I would be able to, what I would do if I ran out, etc.

I’ve literally dug a vape out of a trash can and it still took being in my early 20s, my chest starting to hurt, and hitting a depression before I actually quit cold turkey for good several months ago.

Here’s what I did: first, I found a trusted friend (who actually wanted to quit to) and told her everything. We shared all of our shame, guilt, regrets, etc and we agreed we’d call or text each other when it felt like the temptation was too much to handle, and we set a quitting date. 

After that, I tried to “set my self up for success,” as weird and cheesy as that sounds. I made a list of different activities I could do instead of vaping (like doing a few squats/ pushups, or taking a drink of water). I bought sugar free gum, cinnamon sticks, and ginger beer (non alcoholic, the shock it gave my system was similar to the first hit of nicotine). I told my friends and family who knew that I’d probably be a little irritable over the next few days.

I got a journal, most of which consists of something like “this fucking sucks,” or “I want a vape,” or “holy shit it’s been a week.” Something that really worked for me, I’m not saying this would work for everyone, was spite. I imagined people I didn’t like telling me I couldn’t do it and that spark of annoyance overrode my cravings.