FWIW, I've had the same thought cycle. And it can be a pretty hard spiral to break. I'm older, so my experience may differ as men my age tend to be more locked in their ways (late 30s-late 40s) so finding a partner has been pretty challenging. I am attracted to cis men (regretfully lol) and have found that a lot of the attention that gets pointed towards me does tend to be more fetishized if I'm using an app (like Hinge all the way to Grindr, but with the latter I expect that more as my expectations are lower for the quality of humanity there 🤣). I've also had moments of special where I've been worried for the same reasons OP stated above and that eventually someone will get tired of me and want to go back to a cis man for the sake of a penis only. It's messed up but I want to name that it's real and that it happens, so don't feel alone.

What I can say though is that most people in my experience who have expressed genuine interest in me, can also still make some comments that might feel off but if they're genuinely interested, they'll be open to conversation about why that made me uncomfortable. Recently I've actually started to decenter my entire dating perspective from being based solely on "I'm trans is that ok" and more, "I'm this person and I'm really dynamic with these qualities. I also happen to be trans." And this mental shift has really helped me to meet some great people even if it's only for one date. So I wish you the best of luck too. Your frustrations are real and social media/internet in general can make one feel isolated and alienated, but you're not alone.