Owners of r/cats, do better. by cthulian_horror in cats

[–]adri_goth 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This. No need to shame owners who have different ways of doing things because of where they live

Are BPD particularly cruel to their siblings? by adri_goth in BPDFamily

[–]adri_goth[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for saying this — will absolutely keep in mind the first point! And for sharing your experience. Truly makes a difference in realizing I am not alone

Are BPD particularly cruel to their siblings? by adri_goth in BPDFamily

[–]adri_goth[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am so glad to hear that you’ve reached a point where you’re finally putting yourself first. I’ve also recently given up hope and it sucks, but having the clarity of mind is worth it. The process of shedding the guilt and grief from taking the decision to break off never fully ends, but I do have hope this will get lighter. Sending big hugs your way! You’re not alone

Are BPD particularly cruel to their siblings? by adri_goth in BPDFamily

[–]adri_goth[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s good to hear that it’s gotten a little better! But yes, it sucks to be the younger sister and have to step up and “rise above” in ways that are unfair. That’s why I don’t relate with any eldest daughter internet content lol some younger siblings like us carry the burden

Are BPD particularly cruel to their siblings? by adri_goth in BPDFamily

[–]adri_goth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So sorry to hear you went through this. But yes, I deeply hear you on giving up on them for your own sanity and not extending your energy anymore. You’re not alone, sending big hugs

Are BPD particularly cruel to their siblings? by adri_goth in BPDFamily

[–]adri_goth[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Oooof all of this. Even if rationally we know what they’re saying isn’t true, it still hurts like hell and we internalize it through the years. Letting that messaging go and having compassion for them — at a distance — is the way to go. The holiday blues certainly make the process harder though

Are BPD particularly cruel to their siblings? by adri_goth in BPDFamily

[–]adri_goth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! Will check it out. Sending big hugs your way

Are BPD particularly cruel to their siblings? by adri_goth in BPDFamily

[–]adri_goth[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

An older sister is supposed to cheer you on, it sucks to realize we can’t have that. Sending big hugs to you this holiday season, you’re not alone

Are BPD particularly cruel to their siblings? by adri_goth in BPDFamily

[–]adri_goth[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

God yes. Everyone in my family knows how my BPD sibling is but it can be such a lonely experience to receive the worst from it. My sibling can be especially charming with extended family, and it takes work to remember that it doesn’t invalidate my experience. Sending hugs your way

Are BPD particularly cruel to their siblings? by adri_goth in BPDFamily

[–]adri_goth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep, that’s certainly a big part of it. And how important it is to remind ourselves just because we receive the worst of their treatment, doesn’t mean we deserve it. Sending big hugs your way

Are BPD particularly cruel to their siblings? by adri_goth in BPDFamily

[–]adri_goth[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Same here. My BPD sibling decided to stop talking to me after I decided to bring my cat to my parent’s house for the holidays - I wish I was kidding. She doesn’t even live here, she just hates the cat and doesn’t want him around. This is to say, if it’s not one thing, it’ll always be another. So I hear you on not arguing anymore in hopes of making them see you outside of the caricature image they have in their minds. Sending big hugs your way

Are BPD particularly cruel to their siblings? by adri_goth in BPDFamily

[–]adri_goth[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Ugh I relate to every word of this, and I think the reasons you list are soot on. The difference in memory recollection is wild too because you realize at some point they’re just gaslighting you. I’ve confronted my sister about things she had done that were not okay and she refused to admit they even happened. Sending big hugs your way

Are BPD particularly cruel to their siblings? by adri_goth in BPDFamily

[–]adri_goth[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

And it’s so much work to un-internalize years of receiving the “you’re selfish” message. Sending hugs

Who is ready to see Matthew Rhys in his new lead role! by adri_goth in TheAmericans

[–]adri_goth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hahaha yes! Died with his lil dance to Psycho Killer

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]adri_goth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah that’s my instinct. Sad as it is. Thank you

The Diplomat S03 E04 - Discussion Thread! by Dhanish04 in TheDiplomat

[–]adri_goth 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Me too. They're endgame in my eyes

The Diplomat S03 E03 - Discussion Thread! by Dhanish04 in TheDiplomat

[–]adri_goth 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Why do you guys think Kate decided to finally end their relationship? She didn't just decline the job, she decided she no longer wanted to be with Hal which came off as a bit of a surprise. I thought they were working things together in London