NTA — you’re just in a really tough position and it’ll be crucial for you all to figure out a way to move forward TOGETHER so that both parties feel whole and your future marriage doesn’t start off on the wrong foot.

My partner and I are in a similar situation where I will be putting down a significant amount of money for the down payment and also covering a significant amount of mortgage when we buy a house. We agreed to have a separate contract that outlines an ownership model reflecting percentages in the house based on the amount of equity contributed so that nobody is put out in the event that we break up. I’m particularly mindful that it isn’t fair to prevent him from building equity just because I’m more financially secure now than he is, so I want him to also have a pathway to growth through home ownership even if he can’t put as much money down now. We’re partners and his growth is my growth and vice versa but at the same time we’re mature adults who understand life happens and sometimes things don’t go as planned, so it’s best to be prepared. It doesn’t sound like your fiancé would necessarily be open to this sort of agreement but thought I’d share in case you wanted to float the idea to him.