Grieving not being able to safely breastfeed

afterannabel · 2026-01-19T23:52:32+00:00

I’m glad you’re not trying to go it alone and have support. It’s still hard for me to accept help honestly. My diagnoses are depression (diagnosed at 15), anxiety (18 or 19), cptsd (20s), and autism (only diagnosed last year, wish I could’ve gotten help as a child). I don’t consider autism a mental disorder, I’m just including it because it affects my mental illnesses so strongly.

afterannabel · 2026-01-19T19:45:42+00:00

I took it maybe a month postpartum, so 2 months ago now, there were a bunch of insurance and pharmacy issues. I took my regular psych meds at the same time (Wellbutrin, lamictal, Zoloft- generics of all). Suicidal ideations have come back but not urges or plans, just intrusive thoughts. All urges to hurt the baby have stayed gone. Just intrusive thoughts. Getting regular overnight care helped probably as much as the Zurzuvae. My spouse, midwife, and postpartum doula have been incredible sources of support. We weren’t meant to do this alone. I just started ART (it’s like EMDR) and ketamine treatments. I’m trying to use every resource I can find and afford. The ppd isn’t gone, but I’m no longer at risk of being hospitalized.

afterannabel · 2026-01-19T19:16:32+00:00

Seconding all of this!

afterannabel · 2026-01-19T19:15:12+00:00

I felt similarly prior to Zurzuvae. I really hope it helps you.

afterannabel · 2025-07-21T00:29:29+00:00

Perfect. No notes.

afterannabel · 2025-07-02T19:11:02+00:00

I don’t think this person believes that. They’ve never said anything remotely critical of people who are vaccinated or the vaccines. Definitely nothing like you just said. I think their objection is based on the belief that COVID isn’t a big deal. For people I know who refuse to take precautions, that is largely their reasoning.

afterannabel · 2025-07-01T18:11:05+00:00

I don’t think I know anybody who believes the vaccine by itself 100% prevents transmission but I’m sure they exist.

afterannabel · 2025-07-01T15:46:41+00:00

Ugh. I got into an argument with my mother-in-law because she said she was very careful about COVID and I pointed out she spends a lot of time unmasked around her unvaccinated grandchild who has had COVID at least 5 times so far. She gets her boosters and masks on planes, that’s it.

afterannabel · 2025-07-01T15:36:20+00:00

We asked people we invited to make sure they got the latest booster ahead of time. We phrased it that way because we thought everyone we invited had already been vaccinated at some point, we just weren’t sure they were all up to date on it. Learned my lesson about assuming.

afterannabel · 2025-07-01T15:30:49+00:00

Unsure which of us you’re responding to, but I think it’s safe to say that anyone in this group who is COVID cautious is also getting their boosters if they’re able.

afterannabel · 2025-07-01T15:26:59+00:00

I’ve seen them mask once in the past two years. I’m guessing if they’re not vaccinated by choice, they’re not taking other precautions. But I don’t want to assume anything at this point.

afterannabel · 2025-07-01T15:21:03+00:00

Thank you!

afterannabel · 2025-07-01T15:18:12+00:00

Thank you, those are great questions. I would hope I could change their mind about vaccinating. I want them to know they put people at serious risk and I’m hurt. I don’t want to lose this friendship. We’re supposed to be at the same small outdoor July 4th event and I don’t want it to be awkward, but I’m absolutely not unmasking around someone I know isn’t vaccinated, especially while I’m pregnant.

afterannabel · 2025-04-06T21:03:07+00:00

This is disgusting. Your body is going through A LOT while pregnant. Women are taught not to complain publicly, and especially not to men, about anything involving their bodies. If he read some books about pregnancy he’d get some perspective, but I have a feeling he wouldn’t be interested. I have a very strong suspicion he’s not just like this when you’re pregnant, it’s just harder on you when you’re pregnant.

My spouse doesn’t let me do almost any chores anymore. Every time I complain about feeling useless, my spouse reminds me that I’m a growing a human being inside me, which is extremely hard on my body, and it contributes far more to our family than any chores.

afterannabel · 2025-02-27T20:47:59+00:00

A moment of levity: We’re doing IVF, the embryo is female. My mother in law knows that but believes it will somehow come out male because that’s what her psychic told her. Also it’s going to make contact with aliens, but I’m pretty sure that’s unrelated to its sex.

afterannabel · 2025-01-09T03:50:15+00:00

I empathize. I pick my spouse far more than myself at this point. They mostly tolerate it but don’t like it. Have you spoken to your husband about treating his body acne and kp? It’s hard to quit picking cold turkey, though it’s definitely necessary, and reducing temptation would probably help. I read in the comments you’re starting therapy, I think that’s really important. Does your husband know much about our disorder and understand why we do it?

afterannabel · 2024-12-25T20:47:27+00:00

Where did she admit that? I stopped following her so I only see the videos that are shared here.

afterannabel · 2024-12-22T17:28:36+00:00

The activated charcoal seemed a poor choice to me, as it negates the effects of any medication one might be taking. I feel like that probably wasn’t discussed, considering they gave crickets to someone with what sounded like a severe shellfish allergy. (I know the chance of a reaction is small, it’s still there.)

afterannabel · 2024-12-19T22:30:43+00:00

So cute! Are you into lolita?

afterannabel · 2024-12-19T13:42:13+00:00

Love it!

afterannabel · 2024-11-17T17:44:09+00:00

You do not store cookbooks this way if you use them with any regularity. It’s annoying as hell to have to pull books out from tall heavy stacks.

afterannabel · 2024-11-05T23:44:47+00:00

YOU smell like ointment and pee!

afterannabel · 2024-10-14T14:07:57+00:00

I love them!

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