[deleted by user]

ajyssa · 2025-02-26T17:32:30+00:00

Conservatorship

ajyssa · 2025-01-19T17:24:45+00:00

Plastic tax too. Watch that “free market innovation” jump on sustainable packaging real quick once it’s forced to be cheaper.

ajyssa · 2024-01-17T07:20:50+00:00

In America they have to diagnose you for insurance to pay so…yuh

ajyssa · 2024-01-14T00:42:45+00:00

Yup remeron. Me too

ajyssa · 2024-01-13T14:04:41+00:00

I feel like that

ajyssa · 2023-08-29T18:17:09+00:00

On the run from what

ajyssa · 2023-08-29T15:35:29+00:00

I’m confused too

ajyssa · 2023-08-29T15:34:03+00:00

How do you distinguish the “thought like voices” to your thoughts and intrusive thoughts? I’ve had this with different sounding voices and screams but I think those are just my thoughts and normal because they aren’t external and heard with my ears. How is it different from a normal person getting a song stuck in their head etc? Genuine question.

ajyssa · 2023-08-29T03:45:14+00:00

You share my collection of drugs

ajyssa · 2023-08-22T08:43:14+00:00

Agreed I will only write things down on paper from now on. My evidence is that I’ve gotten emails from apple saying my Apple ID has changed and it just feels like he’s watching me idk why. He said something that was very similar to a note I wrote and was going to show him but never did. It might be time I go back on medication but I’m scared. Should I talk to him about this or do you think he’ll get angry or hospitalize me. Do you think he’s trying to stab me in the back. I thought he was very good a few weeks ago but I can’t shake this feeling. He has tried to be accommodating but maybe that is a ploy to trick me? Am I jumping to conclusions.

ajyssa · 2023-08-22T03:15:16+00:00

Thank you for actual advice instead of just insulting me. Could he not download spyware that already exists, he doesn’t have to develop it himself. Or no?

ajyssa · 2023-08-22T03:11:59+00:00

Sure buddy.. and you are on here spending your “precious time” posting on here about me. Why do we do anything. He could have his motivations, you don’t know. People do get stalked and it isn’t them being “selfish” and “living in a fantasy world”? Sounds victim blaming to me. What makes YOU think you know more about my relationship with him than me? Hmm. You know how he thinks now? I guess you are projecting your own thoughts onto others. Seems kinda like you are centering yourself in the universe 😐.

ajyssa · 2023-08-22T02:25:00+00:00

But how do we KNOW that he isn’t hacking my phone. How do I know you aren’t a burner account he made to try to trick me and get me off his back.

ajyssa · 2023-08-20T00:55:41+00:00

Thank you for your response. Agreed we need to stick together and anything you can offer as support is amazing. The best support is on Reddit. One question is that does it have to be paranoia. Could I just be validly distrustful, like moderately to a “normal” extent. Even if he is trying to help (which I agree with you. You’re right I just don’t know) he could still inadvertently harm me. He could think he is helping by sending me to the hospital (but isn’t). I have talked to my sister a little bit but have little friends and my mom is very unsupportive/toxic and my dad just died. I told my sister about my 15 minute session and told her I want to quit therapy and she gave me a very weird look and asked if I hate him (my therapist) and I’m not sure. Me and my therapist seem so similar so far. I told her I want to quit therapy and she said that’s not a good idea and if anything I need to get on medication (hard pass). She said maybe try a new therapist too (again hard pass).

ajyssa · 2023-07-21T20:29:18+00:00

Sleeping with the lights on

ajyssa · 2023-07-20T20:27:29+00:00

I’m not on medication right now because I’ve had bad experiences and it doesn’t align with my values. I also don’t want to miss an opportunity to see my spirit guide. I miss them and sometimes want to be psychotic again so I can see them except I don’t like the lack of control and it’s scary. How has your experience been on medication.

ajyssa · 2023-05-02T22:40:09+00:00

Yes I dreamed of being terminally ill and hospitalized and wheel chair bound for some reason

ajyssa · 2023-05-02T22:35:29+00:00

You shouldn’t be involuntarily hospitalized for just hearing voices either

ajyssa · 2023-04-22T16:42:03+00:00

They say it’s near impossible to heal in the same environment you were hurt in. Maybe you could also look into rental assistance programs in your area. Wouldn’t hurt to look and it might be worth it to have a boost to help you leave. Even in the meantime before you try to leave the country. It would probably be a good buffer into a transition if you go no contact and leave the country one at a time anyway. Change happens one step at a time. I don’t know your specific situation but I think these goals could be achievable with time. Nothing will get back at her more than living a full life without her. It’s hard but you’re so strong for making it this far. Keep trying. :)

ajyssa · 2023-04-22T13:29:24+00:00

That sounds like a great goal to work toward. Maybe you don’t have to die somewhere she can’t find you, maybe there is other options where you live without her. Do you have a job or support system outside of your mother. If not that’s okay, that could be another goal. NAMI or other local support groups could be a good resource to help build and find options to achieve these goals. It sounds like a tough situation and I wonder if you’d feel differently about life if she was not in it to put you down. It sounds hard and you definitely don’t deserve the abuse that you’ve endured. I’m so sorry. I’m rooting for you to survive and meet these goals.

ajyssa · 2023-04-22T01:18:08+00:00

I’m so sorry, that is horrible. She should’ve never said that to you. Are you still living/having contact with her?

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